lovehurts05 Posted June 29, 2005 Share Posted June 29, 2005 Do you any you believe in what goes around, comes around? For those who have been dumped in a relationship, has this happened to you? Link to post Share on other sites
lindya Posted June 29, 2005 Share Posted June 29, 2005 Even if the law of karma doesn't apply, human nature will generally ensure that what goes around eventually comes around. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
miss-gonewest Posted June 30, 2005 Share Posted June 30, 2005 LH's I wish I could give you some great real life stories, but unfortunately I only have those ones that I have imagined. In fact I think most of my ex's are happy now. But I don't really care - if I don't think about them, then it doesn't bug me. I'd love to hear some stories tho, if anyone has any? Link to post Share on other sites
Author lovehurts05 Posted June 30, 2005 Author Share Posted June 30, 2005 I would like to hear some stories too, regarding "what goes around, comes around" especially if you have been dumped in the past. Link to post Share on other sites
flsgirl Posted June 30, 2005 Share Posted June 30, 2005 Well, here's my story... My b/f of 3 years dumped me two days before we had to be in a wedding together. He moved with me across the country from our home town to pursue career opportunities. Well, it turned out he hated it where we moved (even though he never gave me any indication and said he loved it when I asked him if he was happy). (Side note) He had always been really good to me. We had just rented an apartment before he decided to leave. I know he also had an engagement ring for me. So he flew back to our home town to be in his sister's wedding. I was going to join him three weeks later to be in a wedding for our best friends. Then he dropped the bomb on me. I wasn't even expecting it. He told me that he got a job back in our hometown and was moving back. He didn't ask me to come. I found out too that he was posting his profile on dating web sites. Let's just say being in the wedding together was AWFUL! I drank an entire bottle of wine just to get through it. We left on really bad terms. I thought I was going to die. The pain that I felt was that awful. I was in therapy, on anti-depressants and was reading every self-help book imaginable. Slowly I began to feel better. Thank god for good friends. It took me about a year to actually want to talk to another man. Fast foward two years from our break-up and he's now the one calling me and telling me how miserable he is. He has no self-esteem and hasn't had a date in two years. He always tells me he regrets it. He hates his job and was living with his mother for a while (he's 26 years old). I feel bad for him. Yes we are friends now. Since him, I've dated a couple people, have been promoted at work, have great friends and am taking new classes. It's pretty amazing how I've changed and became a new person. But yes, I seriously do believe in karma. He treated me horribly in the end and two years later, he's miserable. This isn't going to happen to everyone, but it does happen. For those of you going through a really rough break-up, it will get better. It takes a lot of time. Just focus on bettering yourself and eventually you won't care what the other person thinks. And more than likely you're better off without them. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Pocky Posted June 30, 2005 Share Posted June 30, 2005 Originally posted by lovehurts05 Do you any you believe in what goes around, comes around? For those who have been dumped in a relationship, has this happened to you? I believe life balances out. And while the dumped may only want to see things from their own perspective and is hoping for revenge against the dumper, the dumped should realize that the law of karma isn't easily understood and it's possible that the balancing out was the dumping. Who's to say the dumped isn't the one with the bad karma? Link to post Share on other sites
ConfusedInOC Posted June 30, 2005 Share Posted June 30, 2005 Originally posted by lovehurts05 Do you any you believe in what goes around, comes around? For those who have been dumped in a relationship, has this happened to you? Absolutely! Link to post Share on other sites
Jeannie Posted June 30, 2005 Share Posted June 30, 2005 Absolutely. Last time I broke up with my ex I said a little prayer that God would show him some "humbling" experiences. My ex was very arrogant and selfish - thought he was bulletproof. When I got sick he'd say "Huh, you're sick eh? Well I never get sick I take care of myself". He bragged about buying this big work out gym which he had installed in his garage - he was gonna "buff up". Then he treated me like crap and we broke up. Weeks later he called and not only did he buy his new at home gym but the first day he pulled a muscle trying to work out then he got sick as a dog with an upper respiratory infection that kicked his butt for 3 weeks and someone plowed into his truck and his a/c went out in his house. I do think overly arrogant people get their paybacks. Link to post Share on other sites
Bellona Posted July 3, 2005 Share Posted July 3, 2005 Also take heart in the fact that, although it may look like someone has it all together, that could be a BIG act. No one has all their ends tied up so tightly. They may not realize the wrong they've done now, but it hits them years later. I had an ex come visit me about 4 years after our break-up. I had moved on, wished him no harm, but he felt like a douche bag for how he had treated me earlier. Karma is a fact, but we don't always know when it's gonna hit... Link to post Share on other sites
Tony Posted July 3, 2005 Senior Moderators Share Posted July 3, 2005 Breaking up should have nothing to do with karma or "what goes around comes around." Breaking up with someone is an act of kindness and compassion. It's a way of saying "I'm really sorry but you're not the one for me and I really don't want to waste anymore of your time." Of course, how it's done is a matter to be considered but there are no easy ways of telling someone who cares about you that you don't feel the same. Most often it's just as painful for the dumper as it is for the dumpee. Getting dumped is an important part of the dating process. If nobody got dumped, most people would be dating or married to the WRONG person and there would be a lot more of the ultimate dumping, which is divorce. It's very sad for the dumpee and hard to leave and let go of someone you love. But I really don't think that in the context of romance that love really exists unless it's mutual. If it's not mutual, the very best thing that can happen is a break up and freeing both parties to seek the ultimate and real thing. Link to post Share on other sites
Rosalind Posted July 3, 2005 Share Posted July 3, 2005 Do you believe....dumpers get what's coming to them? I'd sure like to think so...BUT - the reality is : the dumper has moved forward with their life, are quite happy, and never even give the dumpee a second thought. The 'what goes around comes around' theory is what we dumpee's like to THINK will happen, it gives us some comfort. I'm sorry , this probably isn't what you wanted to hear. Link to post Share on other sites
VirginiaBob Posted July 3, 2005 Share Posted July 3, 2005 "Do you any you believe in what goes around, comes around? For those who have been dumped in a relationship, has this happened to you?" No, not directly. Usually, if a person is a serial dumper though, they have serious emotional problems and will never really be happy anyways. Some of them actually get off on watching others in pain. And if they ever get married, the next poor schmuck has to deal with it. Expect an unhappy marriage for them or a divorce. But it's not in direct effect from what they did to you that "they'll get thiers", but it's just thier general state of mind. But what does come around is that you will be rid of this toxic person and will find someone who actually appreciates you for who you are. Thank God you didn't marry this deranged freak that dumped you. Get ready to actual be in a real marriage with actual moments of happiness and true love. Link to post Share on other sites
greenhorn Posted July 3, 2005 Share Posted July 3, 2005 Originally posted by lovehurts05 Do you any you believe in what goes around, comes around? For those who have been dumped in a relationship, has this happened to you? I don't think this is true. Those who are dumpers they always get some thing by their act and they are always happy. Atleast this is what I saw in my personal experience and I was dumped. Link to post Share on other sites
lindya Posted July 3, 2005 Share Posted July 3, 2005 I think there's a lot in what Tony said. If a person really doesn't want to be in a relationship, then it's pointless to remain in it purely to avoid hurting the partner - and I'd hope that people aren't subjected to punitive karmaic laws purely for ending relationships that they aren't happy in. "Soulmate" level love is a precious commodity, and we can't hope to get it in every relationship. A bit of respect, on the other hand, shouldn't be too much to hope for. Where the dumping is performed brutally, without any consideration or respect for the dumpee's feelings - or where it's preceded by disloyalty, cheating and lies on the part of the dumper - then it doesn't seem unreasonable to hope that karma might even the score at some point. Link to post Share on other sites
smile95 Posted July 3, 2005 Share Posted July 3, 2005 well I dated a guy from age 19-23. I thought he was great. Until I found out he cheated witha womanwho was 40.Then left me for her. I fought to get him back and did. Then dumped him. To this day, he calls me telling me how sorry he is and how he hurt me and how he has not dated anyone since and loves me and wished he never hurt me and is prob going to be single forever becasue no one compares to me(blah-make me sick) He deserves to be single for what he did to me! Well, not really forver, but he is getting what he deserved. THe good thing is.....he learned a lesson and may be one of those who never cheat again. Good for her I guess. Link to post Share on other sites
VirginiaBob Posted July 3, 2005 Share Posted July 3, 2005 "well I dated a guy from age 19-23. I thought he was great. Until I found out he cheated witha womanwho was 40.Then left me for her" talking about trading down. a 23 year old or a 40 year old woman. Hmmm, not much of a choice there. Link to post Share on other sites
smile95 Posted July 3, 2005 Share Posted July 3, 2005 she was a body builder and looked about 20! Link to post Share on other sites
VirginiaBob Posted July 3, 2005 Share Posted July 3, 2005 but still, she couldn't have too many years left in her. and probably had a vagina that was extra wide from experience at that age. Link to post Share on other sites
smile95 Posted July 3, 2005 Share Posted July 3, 2005 lol- ya she did have 2 kids! Damn where were you when I was devestated about her!!!!! I could have used that comment back then! Link to post Share on other sites
lindya Posted July 3, 2005 Share Posted July 3, 2005 Originally posted by VirginiaBob but still, she couldn't have too many years left in her. and probably had a vagina that was extra wide from experience at that age. Rather ironic that a couple of posts ago you were decrying "toxic people". Link to post Share on other sites
VirginiaBob Posted July 3, 2005 Share Posted July 3, 2005 hmmm, i don't see the correlation. Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted July 3, 2005 Share Posted July 3, 2005 but still, she couldn't have too many years left in her. and probably had a vagina that was extra wide from experience at that age I see you're back. AM will have some competition. Link to post Share on other sites
smile95 Posted July 3, 2005 Share Posted July 3, 2005 Am I the only one who is lost here? Did I miss something? Link to post Share on other sites
VirginiaBob Posted July 3, 2005 Share Posted July 3, 2005 hehehe, oh yea. married now though. Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted July 3, 2005 Share Posted July 3, 2005 Beth, you're a newbie. So yes you missed a lot. Link to post Share on other sites
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