Ilovemylabradors Posted July 21, 2016 Share Posted July 21, 2016 (edited) I'm hoping someone can shed some light on this. I've been friends with a man for 2yrs, let's call him G. He is married, I am too. He is not happy with his wife but wants to stay because that's what he's used to. He says he doesn't love her. I love my husband but his sex drive is low so he has said he wouldn't blame me if I slept with someone else. G and I meet several times a week and have a great connection. A year ago, we kissed but then I felt too guilty so I told him I couldn't see him again. Then of course I missed him and he was upset so we started seeing each other but agreed to not touch. Naturally, this didn't last... In the last 7 months we have kissed 3 times and had sex a month ago. The sex wasn't great for me as he came too quickly. He is now saying we shouldn't have sex because it comes with too much emotional baggage. But he keeps changing his mind. He says he has feelings for me but wont say what they are. He says my friendship is very important and he doesn't want to lose me. He also said he wants me very much and that I'm 'distractingly sexy'. If he wanted a bit on the side, to be quite frank, he could have that with me. Why is he hesitating? Edited July 21, 2016 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Link to post Share on other sites
Zahara Posted July 21, 2016 Share Posted July 21, 2016 Guilt. He is cheating and it weighs on him. Even worse having sex with another woman and the possibility of creating deeper bonds -- he isn't able to carry that heavy a burden. He doesn't love her. He is not happy. All sounds like excuses -- textbook cheater MM. How do you feel about how this could potentially affect his wife? It's one thing your husband is fine with you having sex with others -- maybe you and your husband should seek open relationships with couples that are in the same boat -- rather than you seeking sex from a man this is married and very conflicted and the potential of hurt all around. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted July 21, 2016 Share Posted July 21, 2016 Just what you need, another man who isn't good in bed. I'm afraid guilt is just going to eat him up, and good for him. If he needs a shoulder to cry on, why not try marriage counseling instead of dabbling with a married friend. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Lois_Griffin Posted July 21, 2016 Share Posted July 21, 2016 The sex wasn't great for me as he came too quickly. He is now saying we shouldn't have sex because it comes with too much emotional baggage. But he keeps changing his mind. LOL. He changes his mind when he gets a hankerin' for more strange. It ain't rocket science. He says he has feelings for me but wont say what they are. That's because they're below his belt. He says my friendship is very important and he doesn't want to lose me. He also said he wants me very much and that I'm 'distractingly sexy'. If he wanted a bit on the side, to be quite frank, he could have that with me. Why is he hesitating? He wants the 'bit' but not the drama that comes with it. He's afraid you'll become a stage-4 clinger and after all, he wants to stay married because he's too much of a coward to live in his own place and have to wipe his own ass, so he wants to stay right where he's always been. But have a bit on the side. You got yourself quite a prize there. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Lois_Griffin Posted July 21, 2016 Share Posted July 21, 2016 Guilt. He is cheating and it weighs on him. LOL. Doubtful. Opportunists like this don't feel guilt. Link to post Share on other sites
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