leaving the man you love?

[lara0102]

My relationship with my husband is like a dramatic novel filled with ups and downs.

 

He can be very romantic, sweet and we often have good times together and fun. We are also intimate almost daily.

 

Before some years he was violent and possesive, i left him for one year because i was pregnant and didnt want our daughter to be with that and he hasnt gone back to his old ways since.

 

Only a bit jealousy here and there and he has a new habit now, drinking almost everyday from 4 beers and up and sometimes he smokes weed which i think is a serious deal.

 

When i try to leave, i miss him and i still love him so its difficult and i dont want to keep going back and forth. he wants me after all that and keep saying he loves me no matter what. And it is difficult for me to let pur past go and many things annoy and i become nagging and not so nice to him at times.

 

i just a good home for our daughter, she is such a happy girl. i dont think weed is part of that. and before it was the abuse, now its this and tomorrow maybe another thing there is almost always something. but there is also good things and isnt the best to be together as a family and we have both tried hard to be together. our relationship is a constant souce of headache. him and i have loved him many years and i probably always will and he was my first.

 

how to leave a man you are in love with when it just aint working..

[lbjanieb]

I'm concerned about you because you're absolutely right about the drinking and marijuana going nowhere. Not to mention what that environment will mean to your child. Even if he never got busted for it just having it around will affect her. But you should never put up with violence or even the threat of it. You have a say in how your life goes so you don't have to allow those negative elements in your life. But I get it, it's not easy when you're emotionally attached to someone. And I wouldn't say you should just throw a marriage away either. Would he consider counseling? Does he think he's happy like this? Even if he doesn't want counseling I think it's important that you get some so you have support and someone to help you think straight and sort it all out. It definitely won't be easy but think how much harder it would be say five or ten years down the line. Asking him to change seems mean or controlling but it's not if it's done out of love and wanting the best for him, too. Praying for you...