Tgbyhn Posted July 23, 2016 Share Posted July 23, 2016 I've been with my partner for 2 years, and I think I'm emotionally abusing. I'm very insecure in the relationship, I have trust issues, I'm overly jealous, I can get angry easily and shout. I find it hard to feel happy for him when he does something I disagree with - but isn't wrong - and I usually just get angry. He's an amazing guy and doesn't deserve this. I feel so ashamed. I really need help but i don't know where to go? Any help would be appreciated, thankyou Link to post Share on other sites
anika99 Posted July 23, 2016 Share Posted July 23, 2016 It is misery to be with someone who is jealous, insecure, angry and untrusting without provocation. I had one partner like that, he was the big love of my life, but ultimately his behaviour destroyed our relationship. It's impossible to have a healthy rewarding relationship under these conditions. You really must get therapy. You will never be happy in any relationship until you resolve this so do it for you not just for the sake of your bf. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
LightWave93 Posted July 23, 2016 Share Posted July 23, 2016 I commend you for being able to admit your shortcomings. I know people who exhibit the behavior you describe but turn it around to paint their partners as the abusive one. Seek therapy. As you are self-aware, you will go a long way in no time. Link to post Share on other sites
Miss Peach Posted July 28, 2016 Share Posted July 28, 2016 It is misery to be with someone who is jealous, insecure, angry and untrusting without provocation. I had one partner like that, he was the big love of my life, but ultimately his behaviour destroyed our relationship. It's impossible to have a healthy rewarding relationship under these conditions. You really must get therapy. You will never be happy in any relationship until you resolve this so do it for you not just for the sake of your bf. This. Same with me. I couldn't stay in that relationship and went through a lot to get out of it. In addition to therapy, you need to work on changing your behaviors and thinking. Therapy can help but for me it was too slow. I found reading, thinking, and writing helped speed things a lot. You need to learn about how to trust, who to give your trust to, and to stop hurting your BF for whatever happened. Was there something that triggered this level of insecurity (i.e., absent parent, ex who cheated)? Maybe something like an unsent letter may help release some of that baggage. Another thing I'll mention is Borderline Personality Disorder. People with BPD fear abandonment and will often express that through things like extreme jealousy. I'm not saying you are BPD but some of the symptoms may resonate with you and help you understand why you feel that way. BPD tends to impact women more than men. Link to post Share on other sites
turnera Posted July 28, 2016 Share Posted July 28, 2016 You can't change this without consistent therapy. At least monthly, if not twice a month. Will you go? Or do you really not want to change all that much? Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts