SevenCity Posted July 24, 2016 Share Posted July 24, 2016 If you read my story, I'm currently trying to work things out with my ex. In the meantime, I'm going a little nuts. I've been in RLs for the better part of 30 years and don't remember what it's like to be alone. Friday and Saturday nights are the worst. I am a home body and an introvert so meeting people has not been a goal in my life; she was all I needed (I seem to only be extroverted when picking up women). I'm in my mid 40s and lost touch with friends for various reasons (my closest ones proved untrustworthy). The only close friend I have is married and out of state. My family has all moved away as well. Where can I go as a single guy by myself as not to appear like a desperate loser? I cringe at the thought of going to the movies by myself and watching all the other couples on dates practicing what I failed at. I don't drink so bars are not really appealing. I don't think it's the best time to pick up drinking either. So far I've just been watching movies at home but that is getting old. During the day I try to go out to the store just to keep myself busy and it helps to be out of the house. What type of things can I do on a fri / sat night to pass the time and perhaps meet people my age? If it ends up that my ex will not come back I will concentrate on dating, but for now I want to let things run their course. Link to post Share on other sites
NIGHT1985 Posted July 24, 2016 Share Posted July 24, 2016 I have friends and I still occasionally go to the movies by myself. I'm also an introvert and really didn't need to spend a lot of time with my ex or my friends. But now that I'm single, I'm constantly lonely and wish I had her back. I wish I gave her more of my introverted time when we were together. As far as suggestions for you, try joining a meet up group. There are groups for introverts to get together once or twice a week. If not an introvert group, you'll find several different kind of groups that you can help you expand your hobbies and interest. There's a local one for me called "movie lovers"'where they all get together and go watch a movie and then discuss it. I'm sure your local area has similar groups Link to post Share on other sites
Author SevenCity Posted July 24, 2016 Author Share Posted July 24, 2016 I have friends and I still occasionally go to the movies by myself. I'm also an introvert and really didn't need to spend a lot of time with my ex or my friends. But now that I'm single, I'm constantly lonely and wish I had her back. I wish I gave her more of my introverted time when we were together. As far as suggestions for you, try joining a meet up group. There are groups for introverts to get together once or twice a week. If not an introvert group, you'll find several different kind of groups that you can help you expand your hobbies and interest. There's a local one for me called "movie lovers"'where they all get together and go watch a movie and then discuss it. I'm sure your local area has similar groups Thank for the ideas! I'll look into that. Too bad we are likely not in the same location as we could hang out. Link to post Share on other sites
sorano Posted July 24, 2016 Share Posted July 24, 2016 when my ex broke up with me, friday nights and the weekends were tough. I was so depressed it was crazy. Its getting way better. I know its got better because I can STAY HOME ALONE on the weekends and not care. Thats good progress. Friday nights I go to the gym. I don't go to work on the weekends so I start my workout at 830 pm. week days I usually workout for an hr. But, friday nights, I train later, and I stay there untill 11 at night. I talk to my friends, take my time, weight train and do cardio. Just relax and enjoy. The gym is empty on friday nights so I enjoy it so much. I come home, eat my post workout meal and watch tv. I am content. saturday nights I go out now. I stopped for a bit but something just triggered my emotions about my ex and I go to a lounge by me and have drinks. Gin and tonic or some craft beer. Its a nice classy place. since its in a nice area, very rich area, I go out side, walk around the shopping area and smoke a cigar after my drinks. My friends and I have drinks and smoke cigars. Link to post Share on other sites
bummer Posted July 25, 2016 Share Posted July 25, 2016 Read. Workout. Explore those weird thoughts in your head. Link to post Share on other sites
mammasita Posted July 25, 2016 Share Posted July 25, 2016 Second meetup.com I joined a few groups when I was single to force myself to socialize outside of trying to date. Link to post Share on other sites
jen1447 Posted July 25, 2016 Share Posted July 25, 2016 You could do 'culture' stuff like go to art galleries (tho you'll run out of that kind of thing eventually) but you sound like a home body anyway so just hang out at home. Do sth cool there tho so your marketability psyche stays genuine - build a deck or something, don't just lay on the couch all the time like you've given up on life. Also exercising is good - if you leave the house once in a while for a run you won't look like the isolated loner so much. Link to post Share on other sites
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