AMinor Posted July 29, 2016 Share Posted July 29, 2016 I got engaged and got really bad cold feet shortly after. My fiancé and I are both in our mid 20's but he has really bad ED, and I wasn't sure if I wanted to live with that forever so I decided to reach out to my old fwb from a few years ago to see if I could have sex with him or not. I felt like if I could bring myself to do it then I probably shouldn't marry my fiancé, but not only was I able to do it, I couldn't stop doing it and ended up getting pregnant. My fiancé found out and volunteered to be the "father" to the child but only if I stop all contact with my fwb. I have found this difficult to do, mostly because I feel my fwb is the actual father of my child and because the sex is amazing. I feel like I have been extremely selfish and I do realize I need to stop before someone gets hurt, but I want to get a prenatal paternity test done first. If the baby is my fiance's I will definitely stop and leave my fwb alone. I just don't know if I should allow my fiancé to take on legal responsibility for my baby in the event that he is not the father. I think what he wants to do is noble, but I can see it backfiring in so many ways in the future. Link to post Share on other sites
anika99 Posted July 29, 2016 Share Posted July 29, 2016 I think you have no love or respect for your fiancé and you should end that relationship immediately. Too late to stop before someone gets hurt, your fiancé has already been hurt. Now follow through with what you started and end things with him. He will be hurt but it's better for him in the long run because you will cheat on him again. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author AMinor Posted July 29, 2016 Author Share Posted July 29, 2016 I'm engaged but I have a fwb whom I've managed to become 4mo pregnant by. (Yes my fiancé knows). My FWB went from talking to me atleast 3 times a week to like twice a month. The change came after we got caught by my fiancé. Oh also after my fiancé found out about us, my fwb decided that he has too many kids (3 total, twins with one woman and another child with another lady) and can not afford another one so he refuses to take a paternity test and has declared himself not the father simply because my fiancé says that he'll take responsibility. We still have sex about once a month but lately he's been on this relationship trip. I told him I wish we could do this more often but he says that it would be too much like he's my boyfriend. Then one day I during a tornado I sent him a text to be safe out in the weather and he said it was weird that I was being so affectionate towards him as if he was my boyfriend or something, and that I am too attached to him. I was taken aback because we shared things like that all the time before we got caught. Idk what to think anymore. He's always making comments about me being engaged and having to go home to my fiancé yet he doesn't want to be more than fwb. Every time we have sex he says it's the last time but that was 3 times ago. Idk what to do, are we even still fwb if we're parents? Link to post Share on other sites
Author AMinor Posted July 29, 2016 Author Share Posted July 29, 2016 I think you have no love or respect for your fiancé and you should end that relationship immediately. Too late to stop before someone gets hurt, your fiancé has already been hurt. Now follow through with what you started and end things with him. He will be hurt but it's better for him in the long run because you will cheat on him again. I meant physically hurt. We went to counseling I proposed breaking it off but he wasn't having it. I can't say I actually want to leave either though. I just want us to be able to have sex Link to post Share on other sites
SammySammy Posted July 29, 2016 Share Posted July 29, 2016 If it's your FWB's child, do not let another man pretend to be the father. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author AMinor Posted July 29, 2016 Author Share Posted July 29, 2016 Agreed, however after getting caught my fwb who was ok with the situation at first decided that he doesn't want to "mingle in our familial business" and refuses to take a paternity test. My fiancé and I already have a child together and he feels it would be best if they had the same last name. Link to post Share on other sites
MidwestUSA Posted July 29, 2016 Share Posted July 29, 2016 Linking to your other thread, in which you say you have a child with your fiancé (who has ED) might get you more helpful relies. Details are helpful. I don't have any advice. Good luck. Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted July 29, 2016 Share Posted July 29, 2016 Well what do you expect? He's only a FWB. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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