Love, life's cruel game or am i just a fool?

[Jessicaleigh]

Unhappy Love, life's cruel game or am i just a fool?

So guys I've come in search to let it all out and maybe get some advice, i have a 13 year headache and heartache that i just don't understand ?

 

I guess i need to start at the beginning to get the true advice i need please bare with me il shorten as much as i can

 

13 years a ago aged just 15 i met a local boy while i was on holiday, instantly clicked made memories, holiday ended we exchanged numbers but at that age i was sad to leave but knew id never hear from him again. First day of holiday romance blues i was happy to find my phone ringing from that boy every day for 4 months we spoke (time before social media took off) then one day all contacted stopped. I left heart broken as a 15 year old would be but life moved on..

 

2 years later aged 17 i was pregnant with my first born (yes im one of those statistic please don't judge) MSN had taken off random message from my holiday romance before i knew it he had driven to my hometown we spent time together and it was like wed never been apart (cheesy i know) he promised me the world i was happy to go along then yup he disappeared over night.. Heart broken but recovered and went on to have Beautiful boy

 

Age 18 Facebook has taken off and i get a friend request before i know history repeats itself we meet carry on and yup he disappears this time i was gutted but recovered quick as i was expecting it.

 

9 years later and the present day...

 

we randomly started talking i stayed gaurded and distanf for some reason i just knew this was bad news, he had some problems i tried being a friend the next day i realise he's just backed me in corner he turned up in my hometown and i knew the temptation of seeing him would be too much but when it comes to him i cant stop myself. We meet and i fought it so hard to not let myself become a school girl all over again i even went home and gave myself a well done for resisting. Where did i go wrong oh yeah that would be our 2, 3 and 4 and 5 unoffical date where i couldn't resist no more. We got lost in a bubble In a dream world where everything was possible and then reality hit.

 

I said my final goodbyes afraid id be left again afraid that he was building my hopes and it was about to crash and i was confused on why its only him that every makes me act so crazy? there is 60 miles between us a fairly easy commute that takes about a 45mins but in those 9 years apart our lives change i become a mum of 2 he became a dad of 2 (we are both single though he shares access with his ex and i do with my ex) i work shifts as does he. Nothing in our lives could make this easy we have totally separate lives but i find im asking myself have i done the right thing? Surely 13 years of random meetings count for something? And why out of everyone am i so drawn to him?

 

Currently mopping around and battling a war between my head and heart please tell me im not the only one to have ever been stuck in such a mess and solutions to such a mess would be greatly appreciated. Sorry for rambling but i just needed to get it out my friends and family don't understand and think im being silly ? xxz

[Silver_star]

What is your question?

 

 

 

 

Are you asking if it could work out between you two?

Its possible.

It seems like you two haven't given it an honest shot because of changing life circumstances. You both are parents now and have different schedules, but you are not too far away from each other... if you both want a relationship...try and make it work anything is possible.

 

 

Why not try and then you wont live with regret. If it doesn't work out, at least you gave it a shot.

[Jessicaleigh]

Honestly i don't even know what my question is ? i have to many that just go against each other sorry i know i rambled on just needed to get it out there to make sense myself xx. Think il go back to the drawing board and work out what is what thank you anyway x