Player?

[LadyBug]

Ok who has an answer for this? I was in a relationship with a guy for over a year. During this time, I found out

 

he was still on several of those matchmaking sites. Yes, I browsed them because I have a deep gut feeling that he might be a player.

 

He's still on several of those sites, and says the same thing - he's looking for someone to share his life with.

 

Duh!! He had someone who really loved him, cared about him, and respected him.

 

What is it with these guys? Don't they really know what they want or are they just always looking for greener pastures? Oh yeah, he always accused me of still looking, and that wasn't true. I was somewhat cautious though because of the gut feelings I had.

 

Any advice would be appreciated.

[DUde]

If he is still looking for someone on the web to share his life with, then I suppose you are not the one he wants to share his life with, so why don't you move on and find yourself someone who will want to share his life with you and not look for his destiny online.

Ok who has an answer for this? I was in a relationship with a guy for over a year. During this time, I found out he was still on several of those matchmaking sites. Yes, I browsed them because I have a deep gut feeling that he might be a player. He's still on several of those sites, and says the same thing - he's looking for someone to share his life with. Duh!! He had someone who really loved him, cared about him, and respected him. What is it with these guys? Don't they really know what they want or are they just always looking for greener pastures? Oh yeah, he always accused me of still looking, and that wasn't true. I was somewhat cautious though because of the gut feelings I had. Any advice would be appreciated.

[Tony T]

No advice called for here. Everybody's different. Some men look at the universe of females as a kid would gaze in a candy store and are never satisfied. Others are looking for just one special lady to devote themselves to.

 

Your ex gave you lots of hints so you must take some responsibility in the matter. When a guy accuses YOU of still looking for somebody, that is what in psychology is called projection. He is merely projecting his own behavior onto you. He, in fact, was the one who was still looking.

 

Don't take it personally. It's likely he will still be looking at his own funeral...and even after that.

 

It's not that certain men don't know what they want...it's more that they want a little bit of it all.

 

Hang in there, you'll find a very nice guy who will love you and only you. But, for your sake, pay attention to what he says to you.

[sparkle]

I don't think it makes him a player, but maybe a player-wannabe. Putting out ads doesn't necessarily mean that he was with other girls at the same time as he was talking to you. But those ads can be a good enough reason for you to realize that he wasn't pleased with the situation he was in, and had to look elsewhere for romance. Now that you've found the ads, end the relationship and move on.

 

You said you had gut feelings and that you were cautious. And you looked at the ads because of your gut feeling. So keep following this feeling, leave, and don't look back.

 

You asked, "What is it with these guys? Don't they really know what they want or are they just always looking for greener pastures?"

 

Not all guys are like this. I've met a couple guys that have known EXACTLY what they wanted, and were happy with who they were with. It's just that you've met the wrong type of guy for you. Be patient, keep looking, and you'll come across one that is worth your time.

[WGirl]

I have known men who do what you are describing. One guy I dated for two weeks who said he was going out w/me until someone better came along. Thanks a lot! Once I found that out, that was the end of him. I wonder if anyone better ended up coming along for him. I wouldn't know because I haven't seen him in about eight years.

 

Another guy dumped me for someone else. He went out with her for a month, dumped her and wanted me back. Fat chance! I told my friend to tell him, "I was dumb enough to go out with him once but I am not dumb enough to go out w/him twice."

 

Then I dated another guy for a couple of weeks and in the meantime he made out w/one of my ex-friends and hit on two of my other friends. While he was doing this he already had a girlfriend that I didn't know about. I tried to embarrass him on the radio along with a couple of other people.

 

Anyways, your boyfriend is stupid. Don't even give him another chance. If he really loved you, he wouldn't still be looking.

Ok who has an answer for this? I was in a relationship with a guy for over a year. During this time, I found out he was still on several of those matchmaking sites. Yes, I browsed them because I have a deep gut feeling that he might be a player. He's still on several of those sites, and says the same thing - he's looking for someone to share his life with. Duh!! He had someone who really loved him, cared about him, and respected him. What is it with these guys? Don't they really know what they want or are they just always looking for greener pastures? Oh yeah, he always accused me of still looking, and that wasn't true. I was somewhat cautious though because of the gut feelings I had. Any advice would be appreciated.