Sweet girl and strong feelings towards her

[Pinksponks]

Hi!

 

First of all. Excuse my not so good English.

 

So theres this girl I started talking with last year in August. We work in the same company. It's a big place so we dont see each other all the time. Except in the morning when we arrive there. Im 24 and she is 27 now.

 

She came from 4-5 year relationship. Which ended in last year May. The outcome from that relationship is also a little sweet girl. ~3 years old. Theire relationship has been on and off many times. Due to not commiting too much in to the relationship, not understanding each other in some situations etc etc.

 

So in the August we just started it slowly. Flirting at the work. Eeating our lunches together and so on. Invited her to the beach. There were also my other friends and colleagues. Things were getting pretty magical in such a short time. After a while I was at her place and we just cuddled and enjoyed each others company. I was so in love with that feeling she gave me. After half a month or so she introduced me to her daughter. We started to hang out a lot more. Which includes shopping all together, swimming, hiking and so on. Things were pretty magical. We spended christmas and new years eve together.

 

I should also say that she didn't fully tossed her ex out from her life. He still sometimes came over and looked over the kid and spent time with her.

 

In January 2016 things between me and this girl all of sudden went down. In one random weekend she just was off and didn't respond any of my messages and was indifferent a bit. I knew that she had a meeting with her ex. To discuss financial things about their daughter and how will they do that in the future etc.

 

So a few days after that i received a call from her and she said that: "I'm really sorry, but we decided to try again to heat up our relationship with my ex. We have a daughter and i dont want to grow her up in a broken family. etc etc." I took it nicely but it really hitted me really hard.

 

After that i just went away and continued on with my own life. She still texted and called me from time to time. Usual stuff, how are you doing. I still think about you a lot and I miss you, sent me pictures of herself and that kind of stuff. I tried to be cold but it was hard you know. I occupied my mind with gym, friends. I tired to hold the contact as plain as i could. I did't search for a conversation. Mosly she texted me and told me how she was doing, asked me what ive been up to and so on.

 

We still met each other when we arrived to work and walked inside. So it was hard to toss away her from my mind. I had strong feelings towards me and so did she. That feeling when she shares a bed with another man was killing me.

 

Like we all know that people will not change. They ran into problems again in their relationship. It's is to end a bad relationship when you dont have any "connections" with your partner. They had a daughter. So it's a tough choice.

 

In May we started to hang out more. For example grocery shopped together. It's a thing everyone have to do so we did it together and at the same time we could be a bit together and talk. Pretty soon things were getting physical again. One night she called me and told me that she needs a hug. So we met and she just ran to me and hugged me and searched for a close contact. She was like a drug to me and i could'nt resist her. One thing lead to another, deep eye contacts, touching her hair and kissing.

 

Im not proud about it but since then we had a sexual relationship to that day. Met after work. Had intercourse in each others car and so on. It wasnt just all about sex. Our feelings were magical. She were between my arms and I felt like everything is right and hours felt like minutes. She told me that she doesnt want to live double life. But it's also hard to step away from bad relationship when you have a child. Family value motivates her like she told me.

 

She knows how I feel about her and I know that she feels the same towards me. How should i continue? We click so well and I dont want her out of my life. Why should I remove someone from my life I feel so good together with? It hurts to know that this other guy is with her. I dont know what to do. Maybe I get some motivation from this thread.

[road]

Tell her to chose. You will not share her. She may chose you. Though if she does not then you dump her for you are better off not sharing the woman in your life.

[loveisanaction]

She will continue to play you like a Frisbee until you put a stop to it. She only runs back to you when things are bad with her main guy, she's not staying for the kid she stays with him because she loves the guy. You are the back up guy, she doesn't know how to be alone so when things are bad with her baby daddy guess who she keeps running back to?

 

Like the previous poster said, do not share a woman with any man. If you don't man up and tell her to make a decision she will keep tossing you back and forth like a yo-yo.

[anika99]

You have lowered yourself by agreeing to be this girl's backup plan should the relationship fail with her main man. I don't think her feelings for you are magical, I think her feeling are that she doesn't want to be alone and so why settle for one guy when you can have two? She is being the very definition of selfish. She doesn't care that she hurts you by being with another man. She doesn't care that she's lying and cheating on the other guy, she doesn't care that her daughter is the innocent one caught in the middle of this drama. Nope, none of that matters. The one this girl cares the most about is herself and doing whatever makes her feel good. Doesn't sound very magical to me.