Newbie intro / Don't have the courage to start conversations with girls

[060798]

New to the site, I'm a 17 y/o male

I've never had a girlfriend or anything, never had any girl friends (well, kindergarten/1st grade/2nd grade dont count, LOL)

I wouldn't consider myself the most "Smooth" or confident person, especially when talking to girls my age or whatever (i dont have any problems talking to girls older than me, well......at least girls that are out of my age group we'll say, haha)

I'm quiet, not really shy, but just quiet, I don't talk too much unless i'm the one who starts the conversation or whatever.....

I wouldn't say i'm the best looking out there either, though certainly i'm not ugly or anything (at least i dont think so, LOL)

I'm a nice person.....always been the more respectful, considerate, polite, etc. one out of the group of my friends, I'll hold the door for other people, I discourage my friends from doing things like keying cars, etc., and for the most part I watch my mouth in front of people I dont know well....that sorta stuff....

I'm not a party person, I don't drink or smoke or anything, just not in to that sorta stuff.....

I'm really in to cars, and racing. (Legal, at the track) Thats pretty much what my life revolves around. I love working on my car and my friends cars, and love drag racing. I honestly don't have any other major hobbies or whatever, except for work. (at a retail store)

I dunno....I think I'd be a good boyfriend, just can't seem to find a girl who shares my interests and isn't taken or whatever.....

I dont really know how to start a conversation with a random girl in school or out of school or whatever, I guess my biggest fear would be of what sort of reply i'd get if i just went up to a random girl and said "Hey, whats up?" or whatever......I dunno, its hard to discribe, I mean walking down the street at a car show last night my friend (single) said "Hi!" to a girl in a car at a stop light, and she returned the "Hi" and smiled, but a few blocks down he said "Hi" to a girl walking the opposite direction and got one hell of a nasty look, like "Who do you think YOU are" or whatever.....

I think my fear would be of getting the bad look or whatever.....especially if i knew that I was going to see the person again, frequently (aka school or whatever)

Any advice or suggestions?

[Craig]

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?postid=485871#post485871

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?postid=459700#post459700

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?postid=387588#post387588

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?postid=336443#post336443

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?postid=282413#post282413

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?postid=158720#post158720

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?postid=172391#post172391

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?postid=135910#post135910

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?postid=93130#post93130

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?postid=62233#post62233

[060798]

wow, thanks, LOL

 

I'm real tired tonight, just sorta half awake here, had browsed through some of the sections but hadnt gotten around to searching yet. Thanks though for the head start!

[phidelt127]

Look dude, you have to kick some of this attitude

 

I wouldn't consider myself the most "Smooth" or confident person, especially when talking to girls my age or whatever (i dont have any problems talking to girls older than me, well......at least girls that are out of my age group we'll say, haha)

I'm quiet, not really shy, but just quiet, I don't talk too much unless i'm the one who starts the conversation or whatever.....

 

You're not going to get anywhere unless #1, you at least act as if you have some confidence. Women are attracted to that. It will become more natural with time and experience. And #2, kick the fear of rejection. If you're in a restaurant or something and see a hot girl at the next table, SAY SOMETHING. Most girls if they don't like you, they'll say something like "I'm seeing someone." They won't make a scene or anything, so don't worry. Also, if that happens (which should be easy to get over), what are the chances that you'll see her again? Seriously, it's worth the shot. By the way, if next time you're out you do this, don't use a corny line. I don't mean a joke book puck-up line, I mean things that people say all the time that girls hear all the time like "can I buy you a drink", or "don't I know you from somewhere." Be original. Catch them off guard. They'll respect you more for the effort.

[Just Ed]

Hi 060798,

 

As a man, you're expected by the girls to approach and break the ice with them, I say.

 

Please don't fear rejection... even the most nicest guy can not please a third of all whom he meets... it is what it is, so no worries, right?

 

Girls want you to approach them... and with your respectful, considerate, polite personality, how can they possibly diss you on the spot? They will only respect you for your efforts, especially at school... for every rejection, others who notice your confidence and want to meet you . I guarantee you that girls WILL reject you if you're put foregone conclusions in your head and always expect the worst.

 

For instance, suppose that an attractive guy and a girl are in an elevator. If he rides up to the 18th floor without even saying a peep to her, I say that she'd be so disappointed in him.

 

This may sound pretty rude and ancient, but you're probably bigger, stronger, and thus appear to be more physically intimidating than most girls. So take the initiative before the other guys to show girls your gentle side... have fun with the experience, and always remember to keep smiling! .