Love Triangle Posted July 4, 2005 Share Posted July 4, 2005 I have been seeing a guy for about 3 months (we were friends before then and have known each other for about a year). I love him, but am not in love with him, at least at this point. In the mean time, I have been keeping in touch with a friend of mine (whom I've known for a total of two years) whom I have had very strong feeling for. I'm not sure if it's love or just a general, strong attraction. We have been seeing each other pretty frequently, mostly just hanging out and going out though never really "dating." He has been pretty flirtatious with me and we'd spend hours talking on the phone. To make a long story short, my boyfriend left for the summer while this guy and I have continued hanging out. Last week I spent the night at his place. We did not have sex (I insisted), but did play around and sleep together. We haven't done anything since and haven't really discussed it until tonight when he told me that he has just started seeing someone. The someone is actually a friend of mine whom this guy has been in love with, which I've known about. She has been dating someone else until recently and was not available. I definitely feel like he has led me on, but I am sure that he did not do it intentionally (he's just got very low emotional IQ), and he's told me as much and I have every reason to believe him. Anyway, my question is - should I tell my boyfriend who is coming to visit me in two days? If yes, should I just let him make the decision of whether or not we should stay together, or should I just pre-emptively break it off? I don't know if I cheated because I have been in love with this guy and it would not happen with anyone else, or just because my boyfriend and I should not be together as much as we may like each other (I am pretty sure that he is in love with me). I obviously don't want to end up hurt and alone, especially since I do genuinely love him, but on the other hand, may be this is a symptom that we should not be together as boyfriend/gorlfriend? Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Link to post Share on other sites
Sal Paradise Posted July 5, 2005 Share Posted July 5, 2005 Maybe you should stop being selfish and think about this poor guy you're going to hurt. Why not leave him now before you destory him. Link to post Share on other sites
d'Arthez Posted July 5, 2005 Share Posted July 5, 2005 Either you keep this a secret for the rest of your dating life, and what may follow that, or you tell him and let him make the decision. If you don't tell him, he will be second guessing - and depending on how much he was in love with you, that can be even far worse punishment. "Doubts are more cruel than the worst of truths." - Molière Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts