Feeling like I'm missing out

[NJ123]

I'll be honest with you NJ you're biggest problem isn't depression, anxiety, OCD or pain. Your biggest issue is apathy. It's pretty clear to everyone on this thread that you are more comfortable with the status quo than you are with change. Humans are creatures of habit and they resist change. It usually takes a crisis to get a human to change. You are suffering form something called The Sickness Unto Death. A condition described by Soren Kierkegarde in the 19th Century.

 

I'm not going to paraphrase for you, you've been spoon fed enough. If you care to look it up a google search is all that's required.

 

No-one can make you want to make something of yourself, nor participate in life, nor care about anything. That's an inside job. If you can't find the motivation in you then you will be stuck. Since none of the physical, rational and usual things are exciting enough for you to want to live. Why not go and find some kind of the off the wall theory that does excite you? I'm serious, go take up chaos magick or shamanism, become a conspiracy theorist, an alien abductee take up quantum mechanics or become an offing Jedi knight for all it matters. The point is, you have to find something to believe in. Any of these things would just make you a more interesting person for a start.

 

Life isn't inherently meaningful. Why do you think religion is so popular? It creates meaning where life creates chaos. It gives a framework to hang hope on and something to look forward to.

 

Having a relationship would have been an exciting part of life but obviously I can't have that so I try my hardest to not think about that anymore. And maybe life isn't meaningful but at least most others get to actually live a full life being healthy for most of it.

[MidwestUSA]

Yep, I just love to sit around & let my life go to waste complaining. It's great to be able to not be able to function like a normal human each day. I've always wanted my life to turn out the way it has.

 

You know, I'm going to throw this out there, in the face of all the great suggestions - yoga, meditation, journaling, loogie irrigation, etc., that everyone has given you.

 

Do you live in a state that has legalized marijuana medically, or, even better, recreationally?

[Satu]

Even *if* you do have an 'undiagnosable and incurable mystery illness,' that doesn't mean you can't have good life. You can still learn a new language, learn to play a musical instrument, take up photography, be a volunteer for a good cause, or do any 10 of a 1000 good things with your life.

 

Here are some words from people who live with chronic illness:

 

 

"Focusing on all the ways you are limited brings on a case of the “poor me’s” lickety split. “Poor-me-land” is the most unfunny place ever (for you and all the suckers who were unfortunate enough to get dragged in with you) so get outta there as quick as you can on the gratitude gravy train.

 

"Seriously. Focusing on what you can do gives you more inner peace, keeps you grounded, and inspires you to take action."

 

Source

 

 

"I refuse to spend the rest of my life in despair because of the pain I endure now and will probably always have to endure. I focus on the fact that my life doesn’t have to end just because my body doesn’t work the way it should. I find hope in the idea that my life worth living. Hope is what keeps me going and keeps me fighting. Even when I am at my sickest I always have hope for the potential of the future. Because life is beautiful, even when you’re in pain.”

 

"Evaluate Your Perspective. “We can always choose to perceive things differently. We can focus on what’s wrong in our life, or we can focus on what’s right.”

 

Although it’s hard to sometimes take a step back from your disease, it’s important! Simple changes in your mindset can have a dramatic impact on your health. Your perspective directly affects your stress, which no doubt causes flares.”

 

Source

 

 

Take care.

Edited November 12, 2016 by Satu

[Buddhist]

Having a relationship would have been an exciting part of life but obviously I can't have that so I try my hardest to not think about that anymore. And maybe life isn't meaningful but at least most others get to actually live a full life being healthy for most of it.

 

Do you hear that NJ? That was the sound of my last thread of empathy snapping.

 

You've got some very minor issues, that while real to you are nothing compared to the vast majority of people on the planet. You've actually won the genetic lottery by virtue of the fact that you have all limbs and no major defects. You've won the nationality lottery by being born into a first world country. You're so well fed that you can actually afford to put on weight and eat junk. You're so rich that you can actually go and see all those Dr's and then whinge about it. The fact you can even log onto the internet and post about your miserable existence makes you far better off than the entire population of China who would probably be jailed for doing the exact same thing. Your major concern in life is that no-one wants to be in a relationship with you. Here's the absolute truth on that one....why would anyone in their right mind want to?

 

You're sounding like a spoiled kid right this moment, I have no time for adults who refuse to grow up.

[NJ123]

Do you hear that NJ? That was the sound of my last thread of empathy snapping.

 

You've got some very minor issues, that while real to you are nothing compared to the vast majority of people on the planet. You've actually won the genetic lottery by virtue of the fact that you have all limbs and no major defects. You've won the nationality lottery by being born into a first world country. You're so well fed that you can actually afford to put on weight and eat junk. You're so rich that you can actually go and see all those Dr's and then whinge about it. The fact you can even log onto the internet and post about your miserable existence makes you far better off than the entire population of China who would probably be jailed for doing the exact same thing. Your major concern in life is that no-one wants to be in a relationship with you. Here's the absolute truth on that one....why would anyone in their right mind want to?

 

You're sounding like a spoiled kid right this moment, I have no time for adults who refuse to grow up.

 

To say my issues are minor is beyond ridiculous. Yeah, mental & physical issues are minor..... My issues might not be as bad as the extreme examples you've given, but that's still not going to change my own situation. I realized a long time ago just because others have it even worse than me doesn't mean my life is good.

 

And I've already gave up on ever having a relationship anyway. It sucks but the women I tend to like always seem to be taken or have too many options so I'm stuck being single. I can't win out against dozens of other men in my situation. I could maybe force myself to get into a relationship with someone I have no attraction to but that's even worse than being single.

Edited November 12, 2016 by NJ123

[NuevoYorko]

Yep, I just love to sit around & let my life go to waste complaining. It's great to be able to not be able to function like a normal human each day. I've always wanted my life to turn out the way it has.

I did not say you love it, I said you choose it. Your life hasn't turned out any way, you are creating your life.

 

Do you ever think about people with truly devastating disabilities or traumas who have reached goals and dreams in their lives? I admit that is kind of a lame place to go; it's like my mother telling me about the starving children in Biafra when I didn't want to eat my veggies; but still.

[Blanco]

SOME obstacles? More like a whole lot of them. And maybe I'm not, but it's extremely hard to not want to just give up after not feeling well for so long even after I've tried so many things to get better. I can't believe I've been criticized for going to so many doctors over the past few years to try to get better. Isn't it a doctor's job to figure out what's wrong? If they can't even help me how am I supposed to figure out what's wrong on my own?

 

Oh jeez, OK, "a whole lot of" obstacles instead of "some." Once again, you miss the forest for the trees and jump on a small detail and focus on that.

 

I'm done trying to lend any insights here, so I'm just going to say it: I think your physical symptoms are a manifestation of your obsessively compulsive thoughts and generally lousy, woe-is-me outlook on life. That is why the doctors cannot physically find anything wrong with you.

 

But keep on passing the blame to others. I suppose it can be more comfortable to further entrench yourself in the unhappy, yet familiar mindset you've cultivated than it is to finally tell yourself enough is enough and take some bleeping action for once.

 

Godspeed.

[Satu]

I know a couple who are both completely blind.

 

They were blind when they met, so obviously, they each don't know what the other looks like.

 

They both enjoy a night out in the pub, and are very much liked. The go on cruises and holidays all over.

 

The female is a tremendous flirt and gets a lot of male attention, which her husband sees as a validation of his good taste.

 

They could stay at home all the time listening to the radio, but they'd rather go out and have fun.

 

You have to do what you can do.

[Buddhist]

My issues might not be as bad as the extreme examples you've given, but that's still not going to change my own situation. I realized a long time ago just because others have it even worse than me doesn't mean my life is good.

 

They are not extreme examples. They are the reality of life for people outside of the rarified first world. In fact, they are the reality of life for the majority of the world's population. Recognising that is called perspective. You live in a tiny little privileged bubble and you evidently have no idea what exists outside of it.

 

Your life isn't good because of your choices. Period. There's no-one to blame for that except you.

Edited November 12, 2016 by Buddhist

[MidwestUSA]

To say my issues are minor is beyond ridiculous. Yeah, mental & physical issues are minor..... My issues might not be as bad as the extreme examples you've given, but that's still not going to change my own situation. I realized a long time ago just because others have it even worse than me doesn't mean my life is good.

 

And I've already gave up on ever having a relationship anyway. It sucks but the women I tend to like always seem to be taken or have too many options so I'm stuck being single. I can't win out against dozens of other men in my situation. I could maybe force myself to get into a relationship with someone I have no attraction to but that's even worse than being single.

 

I wouldn't call your mental issues minor, I'll concede that point to you. They are major.

 

The fact that you're even linking your mental and possible physical issues to your lack of relationships right now is disturbing. Beyond ridiculous, to use your words. Where is your focus? It needs to be on YOU, and ONLY you, at this point.

 

Stop thinking about your lack of relationships or life experiences. Put your own life first. Who would want you in the condition you're in?

 

Hard truth. Sorry. Forget the medical doctors, and get thy self to a psychiatrist. ASAP.

[NuevoYorko]

I know a couple who are both completely blind.

 

They were blind when they met, so obviously, they each don't know what the other looks like.

 

I actually have a part time gig on a radio station that's owned by a 29 year old man who has been blind since birth. He can wire everything in the place (sometimes needing to ask what color the wire is) and his hobby is restoring antique telephones.

[MidwestUSA]

I actually have a part time gig on a radio station that's owned by a 29 year old man who has been blind since birth. He can wire everything in the place (sometimes needing to ask what color the wire is) and his hobby is restoring antique telephones.

 

OMG, that is cool. Off topic, but I have one he'd love. We opened it up, and the quality assurance tag, with an actual human signature, is inside, clearly legible, and dated May 14th, 1917.

 

The handle is cracked, but the wiring is intact. I bought a Victrola at the same sale. Yay for Nipper!

[NJ123]

I wouldn't call your mental issues minor, I'll concede that point to you. They are major.

 

The fact that you're even linking your mental and possible physical issues to your lack of relationships right now is disturbing. Beyond ridiculous, to use your words. Where is your focus? It needs to be on YOU, and ONLY you, at this point.

 

Stop thinking about your lack of relationships or life experiences. Put your own life first. Who would want you in the condition you're in?

 

Hard truth. Sorry. Forget the medical doctors, and get thy self to a psychiatrist. ASAP.

 

The issue is I can't get better without meds but my body isn't tolerant towards meds so how am I supposed to get better? And I do see a psychiatrist but they don't really do anything for me except talk to me for a bit about things. It doesn't really help me due to all the problems I have.

 

And I gave up on ever having a relationship. I deleted all the dating apps I had on my phone. I'm not meant to be with anyone.

[GemmaUK]

The issue is I can't get better without meds

 

You don't know this at all, you haven't tried barely anything specific and never for long enough - this is all down to you.

 

I did try to ask you another question in my last post on here but you ignored it - you did that over in your other dating type thread too.

 

Anti-biotics should never be taken as often as you take them. That first course and when it obviously wasn't working that is when you go back BEFORE you have finished the course for another course. You do that until the infection clears (if it is an infection), you do this again before finishing the second course and take another course.

If at the end of 3 courses of anti-biotics straight in a row the problem hasn't cleared then it's not an infection.

 

All of these doctors have never known that giving you anti-biotics hasn't solved it because you never have gone straight back - they are not mind readers.

 

If you argue with them as much as you do on here but you seem happy to walk away with another prescription of course they will try that to get rid of you. They will also realise that you don't try anything for yourself.

 

The majority of people try this and that for ailments and go to the doctor once those options are exhausted. They will tell the doc what they've tried to self help and whether there was any effect or none at all, they will tell the doc how long they have been trying xy and z for.You don't do that. You don't appear to know that other folk try things.

 

You have had a horrific amount of anti-biotics in the last few years from the sound of it so you're likely immune. You CANNOT blame all of the different doctors for this - YOU are responsible for knowing how often you accept and take anti-biotics and if each time they haven't worked why on earth go back another time to just get more? It makes zero sense NJ!!

YOU are also responsible for looking into and trying alternative things for YOURSELF.

 

Perhaps the US (assuming you are from the US) news is not littered almost every day with the fact that overuse of anti-biotics is causing immunity - it's all over the news in the UK on a regular basis.

I had to have some anti-biotics very recently for a tooth abcess which I didn't know was there. I had been suffering a burning face, sinus like symptoms (no coughing up green stuff)and weird noises in my ear along with enlarged glands under each ear.

All was caused by the abcess.

The anit-biotics didn't solve it - they helped. What is solving it was having the tooth removed - and it's taking time to improve. None of it stopped my life.

This was why I'd asked if you had had dental x-rays. If you have any teeth which cause any pain you should tell a dentist - I suspect you do have one or a few which cause pain but you haven't told the dentist. You just want a pill.

 

There is a lady I know, a good friend, she has a condition called Interstitial Cystitis.

This is a chronically infected bladder.

No amount of anti-biotics will cure it - so guess what the medical treatment is - yep - irrigation with saline.

She had to go to the hospital, have the treatment each week for several weeks and then they trained her how to do it herself.

She now irrigates her bladder from home - once or twice a week. She is in her early 30's and what she has is usually something only found in people much older. She is much better than she used to be and doing this for herself.

She used to be in awful amounts of pain - but it didn't stop her life then and since the irrigation has only improved it.

 

'Fraid I have lost belief too in all of the tests you say you have had and the continual times you have seen doctors and specialists - it just does not gel with every other aspect of your life. It just does not add up.

 

I am so glad you have at least done something - stopping the dating.

One of the worst types of men to date are those who do not take responsibility - it tends to lead to other traits.

You show lack of responsibility in all areas of your life and I wouldn't wish that on any woman.

 

You need to grow up, take a firm hold of the reigns and if your apathy causes you to never try anything different then you deal with that - or you lose the apathy (which is getting you nowhere) and take responsibility for yourself.

It's all up to you OP.

[gaveup]

I think you're just self sabotaging. Loads of people date without being healthy. Whatever your health issue is, it is YOU who are preventing you from dating, not IT.

 

Instead of obsessing about it, go out, make friends and LIVE LIFE. Sure, keep trying to findout what it is that is causing it, but don't make your life about *that*.

 

Exactly!! It's only you who can "cure" yourself. I treat depression, anxiety, high blood pressure, fibromyalgia (widespread musculoskeletal pain accompanied by fatigue, sleep, memory and mood issues), VERY STRONG migraine - sometimes even few times a week. BUT, I still try to find a faith. And trust me, it's not easy at all, I push my limits. I've never stopped living, I try to move forward. I'm currently in a 3 year long, full of sex relationship. It's possible. And I met my boyfriend during one of the hardest time of my life. I used to be like you, always wondering and stopping myself from doinf what I like because of my illness. But I stopped, and I suggest you to do the same. Trust me, it's possible.

[truthtripper]

Exactly!! It's only you who can "cure" yourself. I treat depression, anxiety, high blood pressure, fibromyalgia (widespread musculoskeletal pain accompanied by fatigue, sleep, memory and mood issues), VERY STRONG migraine - sometimes even few times a week. BUT, I still try to find a faith. And trust me, it's not easy at all, I push my limits. I've never stopped living, I try to move forward. I'm currently in a 3 year long, full of sex relationship. It's possible. And I met my boyfriend during one of the hardest time of my life. I used to be like you, always wondering and stopping myself from doinf what I like because of my illness. But I stopped, and I suggest you to do the same. Trust me, it's possible.

From my personal experience, it seems relatively well people are not attracted to people who are ill. Your boyfriend must be either very sweet and/or suffers from illness himself to have the compassion/empathy.

[sooshi]

The issue is I can't get better without meds but my body isn't tolerant towards meds so how am I supposed to get better?

 

Like Gemma asked, how do you definitively know that you can't get better without medications? It seems like you're very fixated on doctors saving you with medication.

 

So, you feel like you can only get better with medication.

But you say your body isn't tolerant to medication.

So you're scared to try any other medications.

Therefore, you can't get better because the only thing that can help you is medication but your body doesn't like it and you're scared to try it.

 

Do you not see the ludicrousness in that? I work with children, and I can safely say that the vast majority of them would be able to see how illogical that is. It's like saying, "I'm so very hungry, and I need to eat something to feel better... but I can't eat unless I am given a fork made of gold to eat with. Otherwise, there's just no getting food and no getting better!"

 

Medications can cause burning. If medications didn't work for you, don't you think trying something else might be helpful? If antibiotics didn't work for you the first time around, then, like Gemma asked, why did you continue to take several more rounds of them?

 

Here's an article about the dangers of prescription drugs.

New Prescription Drugs: A Major Health Risk With Few Offsetting Advantages | Edmond J. Safra Center for Ethics

"Few know that systematic reviews of hospital charts found that even properly prescribed drugs (aside from misprescribing, overdosing, or self-prescribing) cause about 1.9 million hospitalizations a year. Another 840,000 hospitalized patients are given drugs that cause serious adverse reactions for a total of 2.74 million serious adverse drug reactions. About 128,000 people die from drugs prescribed to them. This makes prescription drugs a major health risk, ranking 4th with stroke as a leading cause of death. "

 

But medications are absolutely the one and only thing in existence that can help you, right?

 

Or is it just that you don't want to take the effort to do something more to help yourself? Because, like Buddhist said, you're apathetic to yourself and your situation.

 

At least be honest with yourself.

 

I know I'm biased because I focus on holistic health, but I will also say (once again) that I do believe that antibiotics are sometimes necessary and life-saving. The problem is that they are overused, and not during times of need. Such as has been the case with you.

 

Unfortunately, it sounds like you blindly follow doctor's orders. You've put your life in the hands of doctors--people who barely know you and who you barely know. That is really, really dangerous, NJ. I say that as someone who spent over six years putting my entire self-worth into someone else's hands, and I cannot express how liberating it is to finally be breaking free of that.

 

I'm with Gemma: seeing a doctor would only be something I'd do after I've exhausted all other options, or if it was a true emergency and I needed to go to a hospital, or for blood work (because many of the tests are free here--but I'd get a copy of the results and interpret them for myself, rather than blindly believe the doctor's interpretations, which tend to be inaccurate).

 

Notice that Gemma mentioned getting a tooth removed helped her condition, which sounds awfully similar to yours. "But I already told you I don't have a tooth abscess," you might say. Have you been directly told that? And even if you have, ask your dentist if you they see anomalies.

 

Also, you've mentioned having fillings in the past. Even if they weren't metal, they can still cause damage. This is why there is testing available for dental composites. Many believe that just because these white fillings aren't mercury-laden, that they are safe. But that's not necessarily the case. Some people don't react adversely to the mercury fillings, but react to the white fillings, and vice-versa. And there are various kinds of white fillings. When a dentist really knows what they're doing, they would give you a sample of the material to see how your body reacts. I have a school instructor who had her mercury fillings removed and she got some of the white stuff in, and she immediately ended up being unable to walk. She knew it was from the white fillings, and she would not leave the office until she had them removed and had the mercury ones put back in. And then she was able to walk again.

 

Also, reflect on how saline irrigation has helped Gemma's friend. I'm a newly-realized loogie girl, and my dear loogie friend Midwest has mentioned saline irrigation several times. Emphatically so, too.

 

I predict you're thinking/going to say, "But my allergist gave me a spray and it did absolutely nothing for me." We're not asking you to just spray, though. We're asking you to IRRIGATE (and not just once or twice, but a few times a week at very least!). There's a huge difference between spraying and irrigating.

 

Then, to avoid irrigating, I imagine you're probably thinking, "But I don't have a tooth abscess, so it [the irrigation]'s not going to help me at all." Whether you have a tooth abscess or not, irrigation can still be extremely helpful. Just like magnesium is responsible for over 300 enzymatic reactions in the body (and yet you deny the power of taking that supplement), saline irrigation can be helpful with MANY conditions.

 

Try it.

 

And I might have misunderstood her, but when Gemma asked you what your parents think about all of this, I think she was referring to what they think about your lack of taking responsibility for your own life. Sadly, I agree with Blanco, and your parents have done you a disservice and have contributed a lot to your dependence on others to do stuff for you.

 

Okay, so I'm 32 and I live with my parents--so we have something in common. But I take full responsibility for my health. Nobody has told me to take X and Y supplements or to do Loogies, Moogies, or Noogies, but I do them because they help me heal, from the bottom up, from the inside out (as best as I can and know how to).

 

I usually buy my own food and prepare my own meals. I sometimes eat out, but I like to know what I'm eating and I have a strong preference for organic and whole foods (in general). Sometimes my mom will make something for me because she really wants to. But mostly, I do stuff on my own.

 

I work three part-time jobs and go to school full-time. Still, I make time for noogies and moogies and poogies.

 

And I plan to move out shortly after I graduate next year, after I get a more stable job, which I know the universe will help me get. Then I will have zoogies.

 

The point is, my life has very much changed since I decided to take the reins of my own life. I outlined a list for you of things I do to help myself heal. I only started doing the majority of those things when I started to take responsibility for my own life, rather than depending on someone or something else. As Buddhist has often said, and I think it is generally now understood and accepted to be valid, happiness/contentedness really does come from within.

 

(But Midwest's jokes do help! As does Satu's focus on the good in life.)

 

Like I said, I spent over six years putting my life (self-worth, identity, etc.) into someone else's hands. It's a truly devastating way to live, and it's also truly unfair to that person--just as it is unfair to depending on any particular doctor or one thing to change your whole life around. It was only when I decided to move on from this person and accept that I am better off without, that I have been able to discover who I am and what I like, etc. I hope you will start putting your life into your own hands. Yes, it is really scary at first, and it can feel like your whole world has fallen apart, because for the first time, you are depending on the power of your very being to discover who you are--and not waiting for your mom or a doctor to tell you. But once you get the hang of it, like Kevin McCallister from "Home Alone" says, it's not so bad.

 

In fact, it's really quite noogifying!

 

But if you're really, really, reaaalllly set on believing "I can only get better with the right medication but I'm too scared to take medication because it's just going to hurt me," then you're out of luck, and you're only setting yourself up for a life of dead ends and misery. That would be a true shame.

 

It really is your choice, NJ.

 

Not your mom's choice, and not any doctor's choice. It's not up to a medication to save you, either.

 

I know I'm probably wasting my time here with you, so I'm going to stop talking and play with some yoogies and phoogies.

Edited November 13, 2016 by sooshi

[gaveup]

From my personal experience, it seems relatively well people are not attracted to people who are ill. Your boyfriend must be either very sweet and/or suffers from illness himself to have the compassion/empathy.

 

 

It doesn't affect me much, except of my moodiness and some tiredness sometimes. My boyfriend has a very strong personality and I've improved a lot during our relationship. When we are together I'm much happier than usual.

[truthtripper]

NJ, it's interesting how many people and how much concern you have attracted to your thread. Despite posters suggestions after more than 365 posts, it seems there hasn't been much progress for you. You have lots of posters hanging on strings like puppets. What is this thread actually about for you? Is it really about you wanting to heal, or is it revealing a manipulative tendency to collect enablers which you are so deceivingly wrapping around your fingers, for attention?

[gaveup]

NJ123, you say "no" to everything, how do you want to get better and get rid of your issue? Remember that EVERY treatment takes time and there are ups and downs. It's a journey, there's no any magical treatment, no one is able to wave a magic wand. Try everything you can and don't give up so easy. And remember, it's only your choice. Good luck.

[Satu]

Challenges and a degree of struggle are good for us.

 

Muscles get stronger by being given something heavy to lift. The heavier the weight, the stronger they get.

 

Confidence is born in the doing of a thing.

 

If you do something thats right on the edge of what you believe can do, your confidence increases. I used to be very nervous about public speaking, but after doing it repeatedly, I now enjoy it.

 

The more we push our boundaries, the more we grow.

 

If you stay inside your perceived limits, you never reach your full potential and are just treading water.

 

Challenges and struggle are a part of life.

[Imajerk17]

Yep, I just love to sit around & let my life go to waste complaining. It's great to be able to not be able to function like a normal human each day. I've always wanted my life to turn out the way it has.

 

Actually, I think that IS what you like doing--complaining. If none of the suggestions given to you on here work, then why do you keep coming back. There's only so much we can do. We aren't your doctor.

 

Meanwhile, there are people on this very forum who struggle with far, far, greater obstacles than you do, people here who would LOVE to have your problems.

 

You aren't in a relationship and don't feel good, boo-hoo. Well, there are people who tied to HORRIBLE relationships--being cheated on, abused, who are in marriages that are falling apart, and yet they can't just up and leave because e.g., they have kids to be concerned about. Oh yeah, and they still have to keep on keeping on and get up every morning and go to work to keep a roof over their families' heads. And then they have to come home at night and take care of their families. You, however, aren't bound to any partner mistreating you, have no dependents to worry about, and you don't even have to worry about keeping a roof over your head. That's a lot of extra freedom you have brah.

 

You think your health ailments are so bad? Some people have cancer. Their treatments are miserable and their prognosis iffy. Yet they find a way to make the best of each day.

 

***************

If it were my choice, I'd lock this and your other threads up, because I feel it is perpetuating an extremely unhealthy dynamic on here. You keep complaining about the same things, and the other posters on here, whose compassion IMO tends towards codependence (that's unhealthy too), just can't leave you be. So they write long post after long post, getting themselves further and further sucked in, while doing you no good. And so the cycle continues.

Edited November 13, 2016 by Imajerk17

[NJ123]

Well, I saw my psychiatrist today & I asked her about the burning issues again & all she told me was to try not to think about it. I'm just thinking like okay, that's definitely not going to help me. I really do need to force myself to make some changes though or else I'm going to be stuck in this position forever.

[Buddhist]

Well, I saw my psychiatrist today & I asked her about the burning issues again & all she told me was to try not to think about it. I'm just thinking like okay, that's definitely not going to help me. I really do need to force myself to make some changes though or else I'm going to be stuck in this position forever.

 

Why are you talking to a psychiatrist about nerve pain? Instead to talking to her about your depression and anxiety instead? Are you doing this with all the professionals you seek help from? It's like going to a mechanic and telling him about your broken vacuum cleaner. What exactly do you expect them to do with that? Quite naturally a mechanic will redirect the conversation to your car, as the psychiatrist is trying to redirect the conversation towards your emotional and mental state.

 

If you took 5 mins and actually spoke to the psychiatrist about your mental state, they may, eventually take you seriously and then be able to explain these others symptoms according to the framework they understand or refer you to people who can. But as it stands you are just turning up in their office and wasting their time as far as they are concerned.

[GemmaUK]

Why are you talking to a psychiatrist about nerve pain? Instead to talking to her about your depression and anxiety instead? Are you doing this with all the professionals you seek help from? It's like going to a mechanic and telling him about your broken vacuum cleaner. What exactly do you expect them to do with that? Quite naturally a mechanic will redirect the conversation to your car, as the psychiatrist is trying to redirect the conversation towards your emotional and mental state.

 

If you took 5 mins and actually spoke to the psychiatrist about your mental state, they may, eventually take you seriously and then be able to explain these others symptoms according to the framework they understand or refer you to people who can. But as it stands you are just turning up in their office and wasting their time as far as they are concerned.

 

No offence B but yep - he speaks the wrong specifics to the wrong people - easy way out.

Easy way to blame others.

I already spotted that several weeks ago in a different thread of his - he doesn't like direct questions.

He will avoid a question that leads to a point because he knows where that question is going.