Major setback (after 8 months)

[bummer]

Any better this week?

 

Just a thought. It sounds like he is changing many things about him. Maybe another way to see it is him adapting, trying new things, and growing to fit himself into new social situations and relationships? Not getting stuck in the past can be a good thing even if it seems scary, counter-intuitive, cheesy, etc.

 

He was not your soulmate. He was a kind soul who graced your own soul for a short while and helped you on your journey.

 

Rebound with some dates with new guys and keep it friendly. Everyone uses OLD for rebounds, everyone!

[TheSwanGirl]

Any better this week?

 

Just a thought. It sounds like he is changing many things about him. Maybe another way to see it is him adapting, trying new things, and growing to fit himself into new social situations and relationships? Not getting stuck in the past can be a good thing even if it seems scary, counter-intuitive, cheesy, etc.

 

He was not your soulmate. He was a kind soul who graced your own soul for a short while and helped you on your journey.

 

Rebound with some dates with new guys and keep it friendly. Everyone uses OLD for rebounds, everyone!

 

Hi Bummer!!!

 

Actually yes!!! It was just a bad time on August because of my birthday. I'm back on track!!!!! Also I got my Driver's license and I'm like super happy, driving and singing and feeling great in general. Thank you for your major support, I hope you are doing better ^^

[TheSwanGirl]

Ugh it's been almost five months with NC at all. I have good times! A lot of good times. It's been 9 months since BU, and they've been together for 9 months now. I know NOTHING about him.

 

Some days I'm devastated, some days I hate him, some days I just want to know what's going on in his life, some days I'm feeling super positive and happy...

 

The worst thing is that I feel like I'm the only one in pain here. Like I'm still suffering 9 months after, and he's all super happy in love with the new girl.

 

I don't know. It's so difficult. When you think about the one you truly love and you gave everything to, and they shut you down... It's terrible, because you trust no one after that.

 

Is it normal to be suffering so much nine months after?

[Densel]

Ugh it's been almost five months with NC at all. I have good times! A lot of good times. It's been 9 months since BU, and they've been together for 9 months now. I know NOTHING about him.

 

Some days I'm devastated, some days I hate him, some days I just want to know what's going on in his life, some days I'm feeling super positive and happy...

 

The worst thing is that I feel like I'm the only one in pain here. Like I'm still suffering 9 months after, and he's all super happy in love with the new girl.

 

I don't know. It's so difficult. When you think about the one you truly love and you gave everything to, and they shut you down... It's terrible, because you trust no one after that.

 

Is it normal to be suffering so much nine months after?

 

Yes. Its normal to still feel hurt after many months. I feel hurt even coming to a year.

And i also believe my ex is still with that new guy.

 

Letting my ex go was the hardest thing to do. Its like she died and i have no choice but to carry on with my life.

 

Please do not find out anything about your ex. Those stuff will only slow down your recovery.

[TheSwanGirl]

Thank you so much, Densel. I feel like here is the only place I feel secure to talk about this.

 

People say it's not normal to still feel like this... But now you have given me hope that I'm not alone

[Densel]

Thank you so much, Densel. I feel like here is the only place I feel secure to talk about this.

 

People say it's not normal to still feel like this... But now you have given me hope that I'm not alone

 

 

My friends think i am not normal. My ex girlfriend thinks i am not normal. Last year when she told me to let her go, i told her i would give her my blessings if she found someone new, she called me a psycho.

 

Unconditional love do exist. But she will never know and understand.

[toastytiger]

Hey swangirl,

 

There is no "normal" and no timeline for moving on. 9 months isn't "too long" Especially considering what happened and how big of an experience this was for you.

 

And besides, it's not like you've been totally stagnant. Sounds like you have made a TON of progress, keep it up! I'm rooting for you. It'll just keep getting easier

[TheSwanGirl]

Hey swangirl,

 

There is no "normal" and no timeline for moving on. 9 months isn't "too long" Especially considering what happened and how big of an experience this was for you.

 

And besides, it's not like you've been totally stagnant. Sounds like you have made a TON of progress, keep it up! I'm rooting for you. It'll just keep getting easier

 

GIRRRRRRRRRRL, I didn't see this answer. You're amazing!!!!!

 

It was just a quick setback and now I'm back on my feet again!!! Yay!!!

 

I feel I don't love him anymore, it still hurts of course, and I dream about him all nights, and of course I still miss him sometimes, but I can say for sure I don't feel that burning love anymore.

 

I'm going to check threads and see if I can be any help towards these amazing people at LS. You guys, you are the real MVP. I'm seeing the light at the other side of the tunel

 

I have a little something to share, though:

 

The thing is that I was on Twitter (my favorite social media!) and I write a lot of silly stuff there. It's mostly about Harry Potter, Star Wars, and new movies or news or books that I'm currently reading. So I never write ANYTHING about my private life there. ANYTHING. I write a lot about Taylor Swift too (I love this girl since 2006). I could tell you my Twitter account but mostly I write in Spanish soooo I guess it won't be useful in this case.

 

But last week I recieved a new follower, a girl. As I don't have many followers, I clicked on her profile, as usual when someone follows me and see if they post something worthy of following. Guess what!? It was the best friend of my ex's new gf. They had pictures together, that's how I figured it out. I started laughing. They were stalking me and they hit the follow button accidentally. So I couldn't resist and went to her TW account, and it was all trash talking about me. Pathetic, I know. "Go home you stupid b*tch", "OMG Taylor Swift sucks, she's terrible" (obviously, she's writing these stuff because of me. My ex loved TS and she knows I love her too). She only tweets about me, even NOW. I mean, come one! It's been almost a YEAR dude. I don't talk to him, and I for SURE don't write ANYTHING about them. Not sad quotes, nothing personal, nada. And I never even wrote anything about her. Why would I??? It only shows lack of class and maturity. Anyway, right now I'm just curious. Why if they are so so happy as they are, she's still so angry with me? Why would she talk trash about me if she's super happy??!?!? It makes no sense. If she was the one to get hurt, I woud understand that she writes about me on her social media but being her the one that is with him, I just don't get it. She's a pretty girl, she doesn't have to be jealous of me. I truly don't see the reason why, honestly. Every tweet, and I mean, EVERY tweet, it's directed to me: the music I like, the things I do or how I dress, even my hair colour. She writes pretty mean things, but those things don't get to me. Yeah before they hurt, but right now they don't. I'm just curious why her life revolves around mine (which it's impossible that she knows something about... I had to change my FB and make my Instagram private because of her and her friends, remember?).

 

Any ideas?

 

Thank you thank thank you thank you and remember, TIME DOES HEAL.

[TheSwanGirl]

GIRRRRRRRRRRL, I didn't see this answer. You're amazing!!!!!

 

It was just a quick setback and now I'm back on my feet again!!! Yay!!!

 

I feel I don't love him anymore, it still hurts of course, and I dream about him all nights, and of course I still miss him sometimes, but I can say for sure I don't feel that burning love anymore.

 

I'm going to check threads and see if I can be any help towards these amazing people at LS. You guys, you are the real MVP. I'm seeing the light at the other side of the tunel

 

I have a little something to share, though:

 

The thing is that I was on Twitter (my favorite social media!) and I write a lot of silly stuff there. It's mostly about Harry Potter, Star Wars, and new movies or news or books that I'm currently reading. So I never write ANYTHING about my private life there. ANYTHING. I write a lot about Taylor Swift too (I love this girl since 2006). I could tell you my Twitter account but mostly I write in Spanish soooo I guess it won't be useful in this case.

 

But last week I recieved a new follower, a girl. As I don't have many followers, I clicked on her profile, as usual when someone follows me and see if they post something worthy of following. Guess what!? It was the best friend of my ex's new gf. They had pictures together, that's how I figured it out. I started laughing. They were stalking me and they hit the follow button accidentally. So I couldn't resist and went to her TW account, and it was all trash talking about me. Pathetic, I know. "Go home you stupid b*tch", "OMG Taylor Swift sucks, she's terrible" (obviously, she's writing these stuff because of me. My ex loved TS and she knows I love her too). She only tweets about me, even NOW. I mean, come one! It's been almost a YEAR dude. I don't talk to him, and I for SURE don't write ANYTHING about them. Not sad quotes, nothing personal, nada. And I never even wrote anything about her. Why would I??? It only shows lack of class and maturity. Anyway, right now I'm just curious. Why if they are so so happy as they are, she's still so angry with me? Why would she talk trash about me if she's super happy??!?!? It makes no sense. If she was the one to get hurt, I woud understand that she writes about me on her social media but being her the one that is with him, I just don't get it. She's a pretty girl, she doesn't have to be jealous of me. I truly don't see the reason why, honestly. Every tweet, and I mean, EVERY tweet, it's directed to me: the music I like, the things I do or how I dress, even my hair colour. She writes pretty mean things, but those things don't get to me. Yeah before they hurt, but right now they don't. I'm just curious why her life revolves around mine (which it's impossible that she knows something about... I had to change my FB and make my Instagram private because of her and her friends, remember?).

 

Any ideas?

 

Thank you thank thank you thank you and remember, TIME DOES HEAL.

 

Any advice?