John Charles Posted July 5, 2005 Share Posted July 5, 2005 anybody seen the movie hitch or do we live alone at home and go online the whole time. how does one respect women? i mean i saw hitch the movie and i eventually want what albert has in the end. real love. but i am more like vance, the pig that slams, and ducks out the door. but my history is scared much like hitch's relationship with this girl that he smothered with being needy and too nice. there was a time when i was like chip, the man with all the pick up lines, because i wanted to score. what im looking for here is a way not to see them as meat but as human beings that need respect like any other guy i respect. Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted July 5, 2005 Share Posted July 5, 2005 Pretend they're human. Link to post Share on other sites
Zaira Posted July 5, 2005 Share Posted July 5, 2005 Don't lie. Also, about the "too needy" thing. Everyone needs their own space from time to time. I think it's great to spend time doing things together, but everyone still needs to have their own sense of identity and independence. You've got to be willing to give it Link to post Share on other sites
d'Arthez Posted July 5, 2005 Share Posted July 5, 2005 Originally posted by moimeme Pretend they're human. No. Realize that they are human. Pretending will fall short once you get to know a woman. Link to post Share on other sites
morrigan Posted July 5, 2005 Share Posted July 5, 2005 Treat a person with the same respect and honesty you would want given to yourself. Don't think you can change how they behave--it's a relationship, not a Pavlov experiment. If they're abusive, leave. If someone cheats on you or plays mind games, don't be a similar a$$ by doling out drama, either tell them why you are upset or be clear that the relationship is over. Zaira's right about everyone needing personal space and their own identity. Be with someone because you care about them and enjoy sharing your life with them. Don't demand that the other person fulfill all or your needs or transform your life. Link to post Share on other sites
guest Posted July 5, 2005 Share Posted July 5, 2005 Originally posted by John Charles anybody seen the movie hitch or do we live alone at home and go online the whole time. how does one respect women? i mean i saw hitch the movie and i eventually want what albert has in the end. real love. but i am more like vance, the pig that slams, and ducks out the door. but my history is scared much like hitch's relationship with this girl that he smothered with being needy and too nice. there was a time when i was like chip, the man with all the pick up lines, because i wanted to score. what im looking for here is a way not to see them as meat but as human beings that need respect like anyother guy i respect. Maybe instead of thinking of women as a separate group - think of them like any other guy. Women are individuals and once you get to know people your view will change. If you go into a meeting or room with women and all you want is to have sex with someone, your approach will be different and your attitude won't change. What do your friends like to do? Do you play video games? Approach women like you would if you were meeting some new guy - you size them up to see if they like the same things you like: same hobbies/movies/games/sports, etc. Maybe once you have a few female friends you will stop seeing women as a herd of sexcattle. Link to post Share on other sites
lindya Posted July 5, 2005 Share Posted July 5, 2005 the OP and his quest to learn how to respect women. JC, seeing women as being more than "just meat" will involve making a conscious effort to be more than "just meat" yourself. I don't really know what else to say about it. Link to post Share on other sites
morrigan Posted July 5, 2005 Share Posted July 5, 2005 I agree with what everyone's posted--as guest said, look for people with similiar interests, and appreciate a woman you're interested in the way you would appreciate your friends. Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted July 5, 2005 Share Posted July 5, 2005 Originally posted by John Charles what im looking for here is a way not to see them as meat but as human beings that need respect like any other guy i respect. How do you answer that? He's asking how not to think how he thinks. Well, just stop thinking it! Link to post Share on other sites
Opium Posted July 5, 2005 Share Posted July 5, 2005 Originally posted by John Charles anybody seen the movie hitch or do we live alone at home and go online the whole time. how does one respect women? i mean i saw hitch the movie and i eventually want what albert has in the end. real love. but i am more like vance, the pig that slams, and ducks out the door. but my history is scared much like hitch's relationship with this girl that he smothered with being needy and too nice. there was a time when i was like chip, the man with all the pick up lines, because i wanted to score. what im looking for here is a way not to see them as meat but as human beings that need respect like anyother guy i respect. Do you treat your mother/sister (if any) like meat? Last time I checked those are women, treat other women like you would your mother/sister with the whole respect issue. Of course, you can't see your mother/sister as a 'girlfriend,' but start with respect and the rest will fall into place. Women aren't human? Link to post Share on other sites
laRubiaBonita Posted July 5, 2005 Share Posted July 5, 2005 stop comparing your real life with a predicatble, written movie script. Link to post Share on other sites
Opium Posted July 5, 2005 Share Posted July 5, 2005 Originally posted by laRubiaBonita stop comparing your real life with a predicatble, written movie script. AMEN! Link to post Share on other sites
Author John Charles Posted July 6, 2005 Author Share Posted July 6, 2005 first of all the reason we read and watch movies, QUALITY movies, are the story that is portrayed and the emotions composed. hitch WAS SOOO LIKE MY OWN EXPERIENCE! SO lets say what happened to me- HAPPENED before the MOVIE opened. DUH! anyway thanks yall it helps when theres QUALITY advice her. i actually did that today at work and it was pretty chill. sure i still checked out a few, der im a guy, but i respected the ones i talked to like any other dude. kool. if you couldn't relate to a story you must be watching a porno! lol Link to post Share on other sites
Author John Charles Posted July 6, 2005 Author Share Posted July 6, 2005 wow just read the rest of L's post. ahaha nice Link to post Share on other sites
lostinlove0479 Posted July 11, 2005 Share Posted July 11, 2005 What the hell is wrong with you, John! ( laughing but not really) I don't know how to tell you to have respect for a woman. If your anything like Vance in the movie, you've got some definite work to do. You treat a woman just like any person walking. You probably have so many assumptions and preconcieved ideas about women that all you see is a new set of panties to get into. You should have learned respect from the relationships with the women in your life (aka mom, sister, aunt). If you ever want a fulfilling relationship with a woman you have to have a genuine interest in that woman and respect her ideas, morals, etc... Be yourself and allow her to be herself. But if being yourself equals running lines and b.s. comments about men over women, be someone else...or shall I say, a remodeled you. It takes time to change a mindset that has obviously been developing for many, many years. There is nothing any of us can say, that can tell you how to think. You've got to find those answers in the relationships with women that already exist in your life. Link to post Share on other sites
lostinlove0479 Posted July 11, 2005 Share Posted July 11, 2005 What the hell is wrong with you, John! ( laughing but not really) I don't know how to tell you to have respect for a woman. If your anything like Vance in the movie, you've got some definite work to do. You treat a woman just like any person walking. You probably have so many assumptions and preconcieved ideas about women that all you see is a new set of panties to get into. You should have learned respect from the relationships with the women in your life (aka mom, sister, aunt). If you ever want a fulfilling relationship with a woman you have to have a genuine interest in that woman and respect her ideas, morals, etc... Be yourself and allow her to be herself. But if being yourself equals running lines and b.s. comments about men over women, be someone else...or shall I say, a remodeled you. It takes time to change a mindset that has obviously been developing for many, many years. There is nothing any of us can say, that can tell you how to think. You've got to find those answers in the relationships with women that already exist in your life. Link to post Share on other sites
lostinlove0479 Posted July 11, 2005 Share Posted July 11, 2005 What the hell is wrong with you, John! ( laughing but not really) I don't know how to tell you to have respect for a woman. If your anything like Vance in the movie, you've got some definite work to do. You treat a woman just like any person walking. You probably have so many assumptions and preconcieved ideas about women that all you see is a new set of panties to get into. You should have learned respect from the relationships with the women in your life (aka mom, sister, aunt). If you ever want a fulfilling relationship with a woman you have to have a genuine interest in that woman and respect her ideas, morals, etc... Be yourself and allow her to be herself. But if being yourself equals running lines and b.s. comments about men over women, be someone else...or shall I say, a remodeled you. It takes time to change a mindset that has obviously been developing for many, many years. There is nothing any of us can say, that can tell you how to think. You've got to find those answers in the relationships with women that already exist in your life. Link to post Share on other sites
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