ocean_blue Posted September 3, 2016 Share Posted September 3, 2016 I have been seeing a man for a year who is very hot and cold. He is a father of three. Everything had finally started going well for us, and he even asked me to move in with him. That is until recently when he found out that his (recent) ex wife is having a baby with her new man. He was the same at first, but began to pull back a lot before telling me he "needed space" and we decided not to move in together. Since then, I promised myself not to contact him anymore unless he contacts me first. He proceeded to initiate contact with me every day, invite me to all family trips and events, kiss me in front of his children and family, continue our sexual relationship, and even bought me jewelry for my birthday....and yet he calls me his "friend" and says he is not ready for a relationship. This has been going on for months now. I understand that he's not ready, but why does he do all these things with me that someone in a relationship would do? Do I ever have a chance of things getting back how they were with him? Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted September 3, 2016 Share Posted September 3, 2016 We can't tell you why he's doing what he's doing. Trying to make sense of someone else's head is completely fruitless. Better to turn the focus on you and think about why you settle for being FWB. Thing is, all we can do in life is look at what another person is doing and figure out if what they are doing is what we want. Link to post Share on other sites
ksol9 Posted September 3, 2016 Share Posted September 3, 2016 This certainly sounds like a committment issue. He isn't nesseccarily doing this because his ex wife is pregnant. It sounds to me he isn't sure if he wants to be in a committed relationship with you. He will bring you close and treat you as though you are in a relationship, but won't make it official. This will result in you putting your foot down at some point of you don't communicate effectively. At this point in your relationship, you should be talking about the future of your relationship. Try to communicate with him and if he still isn't budging, then consider taking a break. In most cases, this is when you will be able to get him to move toward committment and change. Good luck to you. Link to post Share on other sites
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