Charlez Posted September 3, 2016 Share Posted September 3, 2016 I live with a wonderful woman who has no passion, I'm 47 she's 62, we use to make lovevas she puts it "I want u 2 be happy". Two years ago she got sick and things closed up down there (shes small to begin with.) I asked her 2 see a dr, so she went to a gyno but didnt ask what to do about it. So now we try every once in awhile but no go, she also due to chilhood issues so when she does touch me she wont look at me, its like she tries but really doesnt want to. Im a very compassionate and loving man, i took her to a councelor asking 4 help, the councelor told her she should see a love Dr, and thats where it all stopped. I so miss making love and enjoing the passion but I cant leave her, I take care of myself but it isnt enough, I miss thbe warm carreses.... Any advice? How do u deal with it? Thank you, Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted September 3, 2016 Share Posted September 3, 2016 Ask her again to see a doctor. It is not fair that she is withholding sex and expecting you to stay. She should still be able to hold and caress you. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Charlez Posted September 3, 2016 Author Share Posted September 3, 2016 I can see this was a mistake 2 reachout here with that comment I have issues. She a very attractive and Smart women.. Link to post Share on other sites
BettyDraper Posted September 3, 2016 Share Posted September 3, 2016 I can see this was a mistake 2 reachout here with that comment I have issues. She a very attractive and Smart women.. That's just one person. Pay no attention to him. Some men are attracted to older women and there's nothing wrong with that. You're being patient which is great. However, you need to be more insistent about your partner seeking counseling and medical attention for this issue. Link to post Share on other sites
CarrieT Posted September 3, 2016 Share Posted September 3, 2016 I live with a wonderful woman who has no passion, I'm 47 she's 62, we use to make lovevas she puts it "I want u 2 be happy". This makes it sounds like she used to accommodate your needs, but wasn't very concerned with her own. Two years ago she got sick and things closed up down there (shes small to begin with.) What was the illness? So now we try every once in awhile but no go, she also due to chilhood issues so when she does touch me she wont look at me, its like she tries but really doesnt want to. I don't think she needs to see a gyno, but a therapist. There is something that has resurfaced which is obviously painful for her and it is somehow easier to ignore whatever has been brought back from her childhood. Im a very compassionate and loving man, i took her to a councelor asking 4 help, the councelor told her she should see a love Dr, and thats where it all stopped. I'm not sure what you are saying here. A counselor suggested she should see a sex therapist? I so miss making love and enjoing the passion but I cant leave her, I take care of myself but it isnt enough, I miss thbe warm carreses.... Why can't you leave her? Just like any sexless relationship, if one's needs are not being met and the partner won't discuss the issues, it may be time to move on. Any advice? How do u deal with it? What does she say when you discuss it? It may be far more than just asking her to go to a doctor. Do you understand WHY she has shut down and worked with those issues? Link to post Share on other sites
Future_Cat_Lady Posted September 5, 2016 Share Posted September 5, 2016 She is 67? Ever heard of menopause? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
spanz1 Posted September 5, 2016 Share Posted September 5, 2016 welcome to getting old! it sucks. Many women lose their libidos as they age, and it sounds like she is one of them. But initiating sex, and going slow with a good amount of foreplay can still turn most of them on....temporarily Many women also have very dry vaginas as they age, and lubrication is essential. Some women have thinning of the walls of their vagina, and sex can start o hurt. thtere are some medicines for that, though not sure how good they are. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ShatteredLady Posted September 5, 2016 Share Posted September 5, 2016 Would you be happier if you guys did 'other things' for now? More massage (that's a 'romantic' way to introduce lubrication) & touching. Is she physically insecure? Weight & skin tone changes a lot as you age & if she's got out of the habit of being naked with you she could be feeling very self conscious. I've had cancer & several surgeries 'down there' & it's made me very insecure. Pain is also a big fear. Maybe if you gently discuss what you are & aren't expecting before & take it slow? If she has aches & pains I'm sure that she would enjoy massage & touching. Best wishes. Link to post Share on other sites
standtall Posted September 7, 2016 Share Posted September 7, 2016 She is 62? Short of a medical issue, tell her to up her game and at least try or you will divorce her or get it somewhere else...and mean it. 47 is too young for man to be celibate for the rest of his life. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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