Marshbear Posted July 5, 2005 Share Posted July 5, 2005 Hey Guys, Do you find that you keep yourself from having friendships with women out of fear of wanting a physical relationship with them? I 'm not talking about just women you find attractive but all women. I think because of a past relationship I had with a women friend that now I really keep my distance with women unless I want to date them. I am wondering if other men have experienced this as well and what your comments are on it? Link to post Share on other sites
ReluctantRomeo Posted July 5, 2005 Share Posted July 5, 2005 Originally posted by Marshbear Do you find that you keep yourself from having friendships with women out of fear of wanting a physical relationship with them? I 'm not talking about just women you find attractive but all women. No... I think I'm more compartmentalised in this respect than most guys though. You know, quite a few girls really are just friends to me and I wouldn't ever think of them in another way. Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted July 5, 2005 Share Posted July 5, 2005 I don't do the friends thing with women anymore. By friends I mean being close and going out and doing things together platonically. I do have many female acquaintances, however. Looking back, almost every real friendship I had with a female either I wanted or she wanted me (romantically). So it is best to avoid it in general. Being friends with a woman while you are also f***ing her is OK. Link to post Share on other sites
ggallin13 Posted July 5, 2005 Share Posted July 5, 2005 In some cases yes, in other cases, no. I definitely keep my distance most of the time lately, with one very big exception. i have a really good friend now who is a gorgeous young woman, but there is no risk of me getting all goofy for her. I don't know why, but I am not going to question it because it is a good thing! Keeping your distance unless you are dating is the wise move, though. Over the past few years I declare my intentions right up front and if they aren't interested we aren't friends. I am nice when I see them and all, but I never call them and avoid seeing them alone. Saves lots of pain and being and idiot. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Marshbear Posted July 5, 2005 Author Share Posted July 5, 2005 quite a few girls really are just friends to me and I wouldn't ever think of them in another way. But do they feel the same? If both parties are cool with it then it can work but that seems to not be the norm. By friends I mean being close and going out and doing things together platonically. I'm with you Alpha. This seems to be a situation that breeds problems between friends. Keeping your distance unless you are dating is the wise move, though. Over the past few years I declare my intentions right up front and if they aren't interested we aren't friends. I am nice when I see them and all, but I never call them and avoid seeing them alone. Good advice ggallin13. I agree. Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted July 5, 2005 Share Posted July 5, 2005 IMHO....the only time a boy should be good friends with a girl is when he is banging her real good and hard. otherwise what is the point? Link to post Share on other sites
Chipmonk Posted July 6, 2005 Share Posted July 6, 2005 A few people ... I know a few girls that I'm pretty sure would come down with monster crushes on me if I tried friendship. Problem is, one is a rather needy gal (as in, too timid to do much of anything for herself) and another I have to stay away from for professional reasons ("position of power" = so risky, I'd take the chance otherwise). I certainly fear that if I got to know these folks better, I'd start something I know I'd ultimately be unhappy with - which is a shame. Maybe sometime I'll be dating someone seriously enough that I can afford such friendships - I can hope! But no, I don't avoid anyone because I fear I'll want something with that person. If I'm worried about it, I've probably fallen for her already. Link to post Share on other sites
Cecelius Posted July 7, 2005 Share Posted July 7, 2005 Wouldn't avoid it specifically, and wouldn't seek a relationship either, but if it happened, it happened. "friends" would be nearly impossible because if she were at all attractive, and the time was right, I'd sleep with her. I never do "friends" with someone I had unrequited feelings for, though. Link to post Share on other sites
blue16 Posted July 7, 2005 Share Posted July 7, 2005 You could always be friends with someone in hopes that someday they will change their mind and want a relationship with you! I'm sure we've all done that at some point... Link to post Share on other sites
VirginiaBob Posted July 7, 2005 Share Posted July 7, 2005 Hehe, I can be "just friends" with a girl if she doesn't have much going on in the looks department. And even then, there are some rules I follow that my wife and I agreed to. Link to post Share on other sites
TUDOR Posted July 7, 2005 Share Posted July 7, 2005 MB, I do find myself avoiding friendships with women. Regardless if I think it will lead to them wanting more with me I do know myself well enough not to put temptation under my nose! I have 3 sisters so if I need a good female friend I just go to them. Link to post Share on other sites
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