Hannah24 Posted September 7, 2016 Share Posted September 7, 2016 Hi all! I'm new here and I'm here cause I'm in a terrible relationship situation. I've been in relationship with my husband for almost 3 years and it's become almost a year of our marriage now. But lately I met one of his cousin sister, a distant one. She hadn't been in town for our wedding and it's only now that I've finally got a chance to meet her, even though I've been hearing a lot about her from the beginning. It always seemed that they were pretty close, but I didn't think this closeness would go this weird. She got a job here in Canada and moved in last month and since then, there's no single day that she hadn't entered into our conversations or outing or any other thing we did. It seems like she has become the priority, more than me. They hang out together everywhere, even they go out for lunch and dinner, without letting me know. I even caught them kissing like couples the other day. What does all these things mean? I mean aren't they cousins? Is there any way they are in relationship? They are all the time either hanging out or chatting with each other. He hardly even speaks to me properly these days and whenever I try to have a long conversation with him, he ends up talking about his cousin. Am I over thinking, or is it really something fishy? Please tell me as to what I should do. Link to post Share on other sites
ChickiePops Posted September 7, 2016 Share Posted September 7, 2016 They were kissing??? Your husband is having an affair with his cousin. And I just threw up in my mouth a little bit... Didn't you confront them when you saw that? What happened? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
S2B Posted September 7, 2016 Share Posted September 7, 2016 Does she live with you? Your husband is having an affair right in front of you! Why don't you talk to him about what he's doing to you that's so wrong? And if he's not prepared to eliminate her from his life completely - you should start taking steps to divorce him and expose his affair to everyone. Cousin? Well, that just makes him an even bigger jerk. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ChickiePops Posted September 7, 2016 Share Posted September 7, 2016 Also..his cousins sister is also his cousin. Just FYI. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Hannah24 Posted September 7, 2016 Author Share Posted September 7, 2016 I know and that's really very hurting. But they are cousins. How can I just believe that they are having an affair. Or probably I just don't want to believe it, cause I love him too much. Yes, I did ask him what just happened, when I caught them kissing. And he was like, "I know this is awkward, but we do it like this, right from the time we met each other. We are too close." Seriously, I haven't seen any cousins do this. I'm all confused, sad, angry, depressed, on all that's happening, and I don't know what I can do about it. Cause he keeps telling me that he does love me and all that I'm talking about is just me overthinking. They are just too close and that's it. But how can I just bear with it, especially them kissing in front of me. Link to post Share on other sites
S2B Posted September 7, 2016 Share Posted September 7, 2016 I know and that's really very hurting. But they are cousins. How can I just believe that they are having an affair. Or probably I just don't want to believe it, cause I love him too much. Yes, I did ask him what just happened, when I caught them kissing. And he was like, "I know this is awkward, but we do it like this, right from the time we met each other. We are too close." Seriously, I haven't seen any cousins do this. I'm all confused, sad, angry, depressed, on all that's happening, and I don't know what I can do about it. Cause he keeps telling me that he does love me and all that I'm talking about is just me overthinking. They are just too close and that's it. But how can I just bear with it, especially them kissing in front of me. If this is for real then just move and file to get divorced. He's not married to you he's acting married to her. Why did you allow another woman to move into your home? Scratch that... It's not your fault - it's your husband who has made poor choices. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Hannah24 Posted September 7, 2016 Author Share Posted September 7, 2016 But how do I prove that he is having an affair? First thing is, even though he may not be in love with me, I am and I don't want to give him a divorce. I know that's foolishness. But okay, if you tell me I should move on and give him a divorce, then on what basis can I do that. Cause it's his cousin I'm talking about. And no one will ever believe in what I'm saying, unless they experience it. I spoke to my parents and even they too are telling me that it's not possible and I'm overthinking. Cause, it's his cousin. I mean, no one will believe that. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Hannah24 Posted September 7, 2016 Author Share Posted September 7, 2016 I really hate what's happening, and I'm really very frustrated within. Link to post Share on other sites
S2B Posted September 7, 2016 Share Posted September 7, 2016 You don't need anyone to believe you. You know down deep he isn't respecting you - he's not honoring you. He's not being a good husband. Make life easier for yourself and get rid of him. Get help with counseling if you really believe you love someone who treats you that poorly. You need a boundary. That's a good place to start with a counselor. At this point you're allowing him to treat you this way - mainly because you stay and say you love him. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ChickiePops Posted September 7, 2016 Share Posted September 7, 2016 He has a penis, she has a vagina..of course it's possible. At the very least they're having an emotional affair. First things first, kick this woman out of your house! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Hannah24 Posted September 7, 2016 Author Share Posted September 7, 2016 Thank you so much for your replies guys. Actually I do feel like kicking this woman out right away, but if I do things now, then I'll be the bad girl. I've been discussing with my friend about it and she came up with a good plan. She said we should be catching them red handed and for this we could use a private investigator. She even found these private investigators online. Cheating Husband | Investigation Hotline Once, with their help, we catch them red handed then I'm out of this relationship. Will divorce him. Cause if I divorce him now, then I'll be the bad person in the eyes of my parents too and I don't want that. I can leave my husband, but not my parents. So, I need to prove my point and I feel this is the right thing to do. Thank you so much for all your support. Will be needing more of it. And like you've suggested, I'll go for a counselling session too, to get out of my depression and feelings. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Hannah24 Posted September 7, 2016 Author Share Posted September 7, 2016 Thank you once again guys and I hope I'm doing the right thing. Link to post Share on other sites
ChickiePops Posted September 7, 2016 Share Posted September 7, 2016 You caught them making out. You're not the bad guy if you kick her out immediately. Sheesh!! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Hannah24 Posted September 7, 2016 Author Share Posted September 7, 2016 I didn't catch them making out, I just caught them kissing. And they said, that's their usual way. And to comfort me, my parents too said that it's common in some families. Link to post Share on other sites
doyathinkso Posted September 7, 2016 Share Posted September 7, 2016 I didn't catch them making out, I just caught them kissing. And they said, that's their usual way. And to comfort me, my parents too said that it's common in some families. Yeah, maybe common in families with great big heads, close set eyes, webbed fingers and toes and a love for banjo music. Yee-haw. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. Lucky Posted September 7, 2016 Share Posted September 7, 2016 Actually I do feel like kicking this woman out right away, but if I do things now, then I'll be the bad girl. Marriage doesn't play out on a bigger stage, only two people involved. There's no trial, no verdict. It only has to work for you, stop worrying about other people might think... Mr. Lucky Link to post Share on other sites
Ontos Posted September 13, 2016 Share Posted September 13, 2016 Describe the kiss. In detail. Was it a peck on the cheek or tongue?? Also, you don't need a PI! She lives in your house. Put Voice Activated Recorders in her room, your room, wherever - and see (hear) what is going on when you are not there. Link to post Share on other sites
blackcat777 Posted September 14, 2016 Share Posted September 14, 2016 The only wrong thing you can do in this situation is not stand up for yourself. You don't need your parents' approval to stand up for yourself. Link to post Share on other sites
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