He owes me money, how can I get it back?

[Cheerbabe93]

You need a lawyer.

 

Small claims court in Germany is called "Mahnverfahren" but it is good only for claims up to €5000 and this exceeds that amount.

 

Frankly, I doubt you will get a lawyer to take the case because it would be looked upon as an "investment" as one does with the stock market, with no guarantee of a return. You might be able to go after him for fraud, however, and definitely sue him for child support....

 

Where did you read that the limit is 5k? I read it's 75k. And there was a guarantee of getting the money back. I have proof that he said I'd get it back

[whatnot]

Where did you read that the limit is 5k? I read it's 75k. And there was a guarantee of getting the money back. I have proof that he said I'd get it back

I hate to sound so callous. But....it is what it is. The child is where the money is. Or...would be in the U.S.

 

Good luck

[sooshi]

OP, I get that you're asking for personal experiences and support, etc. That's wonderful.

 

But the internet can get confusing because there's so much information out there. Your child is going to be born in a couple of months--time is of the essence, and I imagine this is a great stress on you (and therefore on your baby boy). This is why I strongly urge you to contact a lawyer as soon as possible (right now would be a good time!) and see how they can help you, as opposed to continue trying to find answers through internet searches.

[No_Go]

I had similar situation and the only lawyer that I spoke to told me exactly that (that he's sorry but can't do anything because it was mutual agreement with very little track record - ie emails). Sorry

 

Sorry, you probably got scammed. You could see a local lawyer and explain all the details, but most likely they will be sympathetic but explain that there's nothing you can do. Even if you did take him to court, his "defence" will probably be that you gave him the money to invest and he lost it in the investment scheme and doesn't have it any more. Investments have risks, especially 15k to 19k which is an interest rate of 26%! That kind of investment falls under the "too good to be true" category and is either extremely risky or illegal (given his past, most likely the latter).

 

Put his name on the birth certificate and make him pay child support. That is all you can do really.

[whatnot]

OP, I get that you're asking for personal experiences and support, etc. That's wonderful.

 

But the internet can get confusing because there's so much information out there. Your child is going to be born in a couple of months--time is of the essence, and I imagine this is a great stress on you (and therefore on your baby boy). This is why I strongly urge you to contact a lawyer as soon as possible (right now would be a good time!) and see how they can help you, as opposed to continue trying to find answers through internet searches.

If she lived in America, finding a lawyer would be the least of her worries. The best in the land would climbing through her windows right about now.

[GemmaUK]

This was an investment and no investment is 100% safe.

Even if you two were together, on good terms and you had all of the legal documents it still doesn't mean you would get a penny back should the investment fail.

 

I would get some legal advice but I don't think there would be much you could do to be honest.

[Cheerbabe93]

This was an investment and no investment is 100% safe.

Even if you two were together, on good terms and you had all of the legal documents it still doesn't mean you would get a penny back should the investment fail.

 

I would get some legal advice but I don't think there would be much you could do to be honest.

 

It's not like the investment failed though...

[GemmaUK]

It's not like the investment failed though...

 

Do you have documents to prove he used your money against the investment?

It sounds like you only have screen shots of messages or something between yourselves.

 

Also there is no forfeit yet as you'd need to wait until next year I would think to claim anything back.

 

I would get some good legal advice asap if I were you.

[ExpatInItaly]

OP, is he German as well? Or did he come to Germany to play basketball? I ask because I have a couple of male friends who came from the US to play semi-pro basketball here in Italy, and many have also played in places like France and Germany. Is that the case here?

 

Anyway, internet searches won't give you the best insight. It would be difficult for any of us to determine what rights you have in your jurisdiction. You really need to speak to a lawyer on these matters. I also still don't believe this man has anywhere near the money he told you he does. What does he claim to have invested it in?

[SoleMate]

OP, see a lawyer. There are many potential angles that may be of interest to you. I don't know German law in the slightest, but I do know law generally and most developed countries' laws would give you at least a chance of suing for return of that money, whether as for funds had and received, fraud, unlicensed operation as a financial adviser, or many other angles. It's definitely worth the effort of inquiry and I do not like to see people discouraging you without the background.

[Cheerbabe93]

OP, is he German as well? Or did he come to Germany to play basketball? I ask because I have a couple of male friends who came from the US to play semi-pro basketball here in Italy, and many have also played in places like France and Germany. Is that the case here?

 

Anyway, internet searches won't give you the best insight. It would be difficult for any of us to determine what rights you have in your jurisdiction. You really need to speak to a lawyer on these matters. I also still don't believe this man has anywhere near the money he told you he does. What does he claim to have invested it in?

 

He is American and currently under contract with a German team, it's his last season because he's getting too old. My parents said going to a layer won't do anything, it will only cost money. Like I said my ex has lived on the streets as a child and he's done criminal things. Because of that and also because he is threatening us my parents believe that going to a lawyer isn't the right way

[GemmaUK]

If he is threatening you and your family you should contact the police.

[ExpatInItaly]

He is American and currently under contract with a German team, it's his last season because he's getting too old. My parents said going to a layer won't do anything, it will only cost money. Like I said my ex has lived on the streets as a child and he's done criminal things. Because of that and also because he is threatening us my parents believe that going to a lawyer isn't the right way

 

I asked because having some friends in the same sport and lifestyle as he is...there is a very good chance he has a girlfriend back home. Nearly all of them here do. And most of their foreign girlfriends don't know about the women waiting for them back home, and vice versa. These guys are very good at hiding their activities; I've seen them in action. He also isn't making millions playing at this level. He's not that good if he's being sent back and is now too old to go pro.

 

Your parents' suggestion of staying away from a lawyer frankly makes no sense. His threats and refusal to return the money are not something you can or should even try to handle on your own. You don't have the legal knowledge to do so. How do you expect to get your money back without taking him to court? His threats are a way to keep you from pursuing this, and it's working. It's also a way to prevent his woman (women?) back home from finding out he's going to be a father.

 

If you choose not to get legal advice, then there's really nothing you can do. He will leave the country and then it's goodbye forever.

[Cheerbabe93]

I asked because having some friends in the same sport and lifestyle as he is...there is a very good chance he has a girlfriend back home. Nearly all of them here do. And most of their foreign girlfriends don't know about the women waiting for them back home, and vice versa. These guys are very good at hiding their activities; I've seen them in action. He also isn't making millions playing at this level. He's not that good if he's being sent back and is now too old to go pro.

 

Your parents' suggestion of staying away from a lawyer frankly makes no sense. His threats and refusal to return the money are not something you can or should even try to handle on your own. You don't have the legal knowledge to do so. How do you expect to get your money back without taking him to court? His threats are a way to keep you from pursuing this, and it's working.

 

If you choose not to get legal advice, then there's really nothing you can do. He will leave the country and then it's goodbye forever.

 

After we broke up I found out about two other girlfriends and one who's more of a fling. So while I was with him there were three others he was seeing as well. None of that matters to me anymore though I just want my money back. Basketball is his career, he's not in the NBA but he plays in first league he's just getting too old like I said this is gonna be his last season cause he's turning 40. I don't think I can go to the police with the threats cause it's not like he's threatening to hurt me, he isn't very specific when it comes to the threats he just keeps saying if I don't leave him alone things will get ugly between us and he'll show up at my house. There's also been the threat of leaking nude pictures but that doesn't phase me. He can leak my pictures I don't care about that I'm confident with how I look so that wouldn't effect me in a negative way. I just want him out of my life and be done with him already that's why I want the money back now

[GemmaUK]

Sorry but I think you've been conned.

 

If you won't see a lawyer nor think any of it is serious enough to go to the police with then you may as well say goodbye right now to any money.

He'll be off home soon too or possibly will just disappear.

[ExpatInItaly]

After we broke up I found out about two other girlfriends and one who's more of a fling. So while I was with him there were three others he was seeing as well. None of that matters to me anymore though I just want my money back. Basketball is his career, he's not in the NBA but he plays in first league he's just getting too old like I said this is gonna be his last season cause he's turning 40. I don't think I can go to the police with the threats cause it's not like he's threatening to hurt me, he isn't very specific when it comes to the threats he just keeps saying if I don't leave him alone things will get ugly between us and he'll show up at my house. There's also been the threat of leaking nude pictures but that doesn't phase me. He can leak my pictures I don't care about that I'm confident with how I look so that wouldn't effect me in a negative way. I just want him out of my life and be done with him already that's why I want the money back now

 

How do you plan to do that without perusing legal avenues?

 

I don't know what advice we can offer that won't involve a lawyer or the court system.

[Toodaloo]

I seem to remember us all telling you months ago that this guy is a douche.

 

I assume he is the same one who treated you badly and went back to the states with out saying anything?

 

Go to the police to report the threats and tell them that you suspect he has conned you.

 

For goodness sake stop seeing this man. He is NO good at all.

[Bialy]

You WILLINGLY wanted to have this guy's baby? Your child will be growing up without a father! I'm sorry to sound insensitive, but why would you want to have a child with this guy?! He is bad news! The cynic in me feels that you are upset that he fooled you and you feel this is a way to stick it to him -- and potentially get a piece of the pie that he claims to have. As someone else said, I highly doubt he is worth millions.

 

Whoever advised you to have his baby - shame on them! This is a decision that you will have for life. I hope that things will get better for you once the baby is born -- NOT with him, but with your new life chapter as a single mom.

 

I agree with the others - speak with a lawyer before he runs out of the country.

[Toodaloo]

You WILLINGLY wanted to have this guy's baby? Your child will be growing up without a father! I'm sorry to sound insensitive, but why would you want to have a child with this guy?! He is bad news! The cynic in me feels that you are upset that he fooled you and you feel this is a way to stick it to him -- and potentially get a piece of the pie that he claims to have. As someone else said, I highly doubt he is worth millions.

 

Whoever advised you to have his baby - shame on them! This is a decision that you will have for life. I hope that things will get better for you once the baby is born -- NOT with him, but with your new life chapter as a single mom.

 

I agree with the others - speak with a lawyer before he runs out of the country.

 

To be fair it doesn't matter what any of us say. This situation has been progressively been getting worse for 2 years. For two years she has had members telling her to get rid and she keeps chasing him down and taking him back.

 

This girl is out to ruin her own life regardless of what any of us say.

 

She isn't going to get her money back and she isn't going to get her Hello Kitty Toaster back either.

 

There is nothing any of us can do or advise here. It will be ignored anyway.

[stillafool]

He is American and currently under contract with a German team, it's his last season because he's getting too old. My parents said going to a layer won't do anything, it will only cost money. Like I said my ex has lived on the streets as a child and he's done criminal things. Because of that and also because he is threatening us my parents believe that going to a lawyer isn't the right way

 

There is nothing concrete anyone on this forum can tell you about your situation nor your family. Talk to an attorney ASAP to find out your rights. The guy probably has a wife back in the U.S.

Edited September 13, 2016 by stillafool

[PegNosePete]

He's probably not even a basketball player. OP probably doesn't even know his real name.

[Miss Clavel]

I'm not in the US I actually live in Germany. I just did some Google research and apparently it doesn't matter that I don't have a written contract because screenshots in which it is clear that he got the money and that he would give it back are enough and accepted in court.

not to mention, if it gets to court before you give birth, how much sympathy you're going to garner, in your condition. imagine how it's gonna look that this loser scammed a pregnant woman out of her life's savings. i'm crying already.

 

i would put his name on the birth certificate because it's the truth and it's a fact and it's not about either one of you, it's about the baby seeing the truth someday.

 

i would not lie but i would not mention any "investment" i would call it a loan because he needed the money for "something'. a loan that he clearly stated he would repay and clearly stated when he would repay it.

 

 

 

good luck

[anitahayles]

OH man - what a mess. I am sorry about the money - but I am more concerned about you and your baby. Please try and stay safe...your family seems genuinely concerned about your safety. Can you get a restraining order if he seems dangerous? In regards to the birth certificate, I would get some legal advice. His threat is scary to me as well. The fact is - you need to take care of you and keep your baby safe. I am thankful you have a family that loves you and wants to keep you protected...listen to them!! Take Care honey...

[Cheerbabe93]

To be fair it doesn't matter what any of us say. This situation has been progressively been getting worse for 2 years. For two years she has had members telling her to get rid and she keeps chasing him down and taking him back.

 

This girl is out to ruin her own life regardless of what any of us say.

 

She isn't going to get her money back and she isn't going to get her Hello Kitty Toaster back either.

 

There is nothing any of us can do or advise here. It will be ignored anyway.

 

Uhm first of all I don't believe in abortions it's murder in my eyes. I didn't ask for advice regarding my pregnancy. It wasn't planned, I was on BC, it failed and I got pregnant. And FYI the post you refer to with the hello kitty toaster isn't even about the same person...

[Cheerbabe93]

He's probably not even a basketball player. OP probably doesn't even know his real name.

 

I don't get what the point of your comment is? Yes his job is being a basketball player, that's how he's been making his money all his life, yes I've been to his games, yes I've seen him play, I also know his name (first, middle and last) I know where he was born and when, where he grew up and went to school and university, I know what teams he's been on, I know how ****ed up his childhood was due to violence and drugs. So I'm not sure what you're trying to say???