Author NJ123 Posted September 16, 2016 Author Share Posted September 16, 2016 Just so I understand you have extremely high requirements for your potential dates with regard to looks, is that what you are saying? If so, are you extremely handsome yourself? It seems as if you are also saying that the women of OLD have extremely high requirements too, yet you have also called women wanting attractive (and taller) men shallow. This appears to be somewhat hypocritical. I consider myself above average in looks unless you want to disqualify me from being attractive due to my height. And I'm not extremely picky but I suppose a bit picky when it comes to looks. The thing is even women that I deem as average looking still get infinite amount of messages on OLD. So unless you're close to the full package in terms of height, job, looks etc. as a guy on there you're barely given a second look. And if you aren't than they move on fairly quick when the next good thing comes along. Link to post Share on other sites
NewLeaf512 Posted September 16, 2016 Share Posted September 16, 2016 I consider myself above average in looks unless you want to disqualify me from being attractive due to my height. And I'm not extremely picky but I suppose a bit picky when it comes to looks. The thing is even women that I deem as average looking still get infinite amount of messages on OLD. So unless you're close to the full package in terms of height, job, looks etc. as a guy on there you're barely given a second look. And even if you are they move on fairly quick when the next good thing comes along. What is on your requirements list? I think it's ok to have some requirements but don't think it's ok to say others who have requirements are shallow. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author NJ123 Posted September 16, 2016 Author Share Posted September 16, 2016 I saw all I needed to see with match.com. Women that are like 5'3" still want a guy that's 5'8" minimum. And if they don't care much about height they ask for a guy with 6 figure income. It's insane so I don't know why I even bother. It's doing more harm than good for me I feel. I genuinely feel unless I get a good job which bothers me that a huge part of the reason they would be with me is due to that I won't wind up with anyone. Link to post Share on other sites
JuneJulySeptember Posted September 16, 2016 Share Posted September 16, 2016 I saw all I needed to see with match.com. Women that are like 5'3" still want a guy that's 5'8" minimum. And if they don't care much about height they ask for a guy with 6 figure income. It's insane so I don't know why I even bother. It's doing more harm than good for me I feel. I genuinely feel unless I get a good job which bothers me that a huge part of the reason they would be with me is due to that I won't wind up with anyone. If you think the world is shallow, then buck the trend and be less shallow yourself. Seems like a pretty natural conclusion to me, but I don't think too many share it. You keep talking about how you'd rather kill yourself than date somebody unattractive. Well, most women feel the same way about dating you. :lmao: ...or me. But my original point stands. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
NewLeaf512 Posted September 16, 2016 Share Posted September 16, 2016 I saw all I needed to see with match.com. Women that are like 5'3" still want a guy that's 5'8" minimum. And if they don't care much about height they ask for a guy with 6 figure income. It's insane so I don't know why I even bother. It's doing more harm than good for me I feel. I genuinely feel unless I get a good job which bothers me that a huge part of the reason they would be with me is due to that I won't wind up with anyone. I've never looked for a woman using OLD, so I take your word that women want taller men. What I am interested in frankly is YOUR requirements Link to post Share on other sites
Blanco Posted September 16, 2016 Share Posted September 16, 2016 OP, you've got a lot of threads and posts, so it's possible I've missed some critical details. However, I must still ask: What do you bring to the table? Having standards isn't a bad thing. Indeed, there would be a lot fewer toxic relationships if more people weren't so determined to partner up just for the sake of having someone. On the other end, having standards that aren't realistic or in line with what you yourself bring to the dance will usually lead to dead ends and frustration. It's not that you can't find success when you aren't hitting a lot of the standard checklists. The best looking woman I ever had a relationship with got with me when I was back living at home after college with a pretty useless degree and no steady income or prospect for one on the horizon. That's more of the exception to the rule, though, and I haven't let that anomaly I enjoyed make me think that all or even most high-caliber women would want much to do with me in that situation. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Blanco Posted September 16, 2016 Share Posted September 16, 2016 Am I correct in understanding that you aren't currently working or steadily employed? That's going to be a deal-breaker for most women your age and it has nothing to do with them only desiring a man with a six-figure income. This says nothing of your character, but you have to look at things from a prospective date's vantage. You aren't working. You live at home at an age where a lot of people are either established in their career or heading down that pathway. You don't drive much and have issues with traveling very far from your home (i.e. outside of your immediate surroundings). You have an associate's degree, but not a bachelor's and you currently have nothing in motion to change that. Most guys outside of the extremely good looking or charming would find it a rough go to net quality women with the above circumstances. You seem fixated on some small details such as your height and your inexperience with women, but I get the sense that the issues I outlined above are bigger factors in your lack of dating success. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author NJ123 Posted September 16, 2016 Author Share Posted September 16, 2016 If you think the world is shallow, then buck the trend and be less shallow yourself. Seems like a pretty natural conclusion to me, but I don't think too many share it. You keep talking about how you'd rather kill yourself than date somebody unattractive. Well, most women feel the same way about dating you. :lmao: ...or me. But my original point stands. I'm not anywhere as shallow as others are. All I want is someone that I'm personally attracted to & like their personality. I don't care about height or hair color or job just as long as they have one. And maybe so but I'd rather be alone than be with someone I have no interest in as I've said. It's just leaving me feeling bitter that any one I'd want likely wouldn't be interested. Link to post Share on other sites
NewLeaf512 Posted September 16, 2016 Share Posted September 16, 2016 I'm not anywhere as shallow as others are. All I want is someone that I'm personally attracted to & like their personality. I don't care about height or hair color or job just as long as they have one. And maybe so but I'd rather be alone than be with someone I have no interest in as I've said. It's just leaving me feeling bitter that any one I'd want likely wouldn't be interested. It's weird that you won't list your requirements Link to post Share on other sites
normal person Posted September 16, 2016 Share Posted September 16, 2016 It just seems you have to have everything or a huge list of things going for you these days to get a girlfriend otherwise you're not considered good enough to them & they move on to someone else. Yeah, that's the way it is. If you want a girl, you have to live up to their standards, or be good enough that they want to live up to yours. What're you doing about it? My options it seems right now are to stay single or to be with someone I have no attraction to if I was that desperate. I couldn't force myself to be with someone I wasn't attracted to if I even tried. I just want 100% honest answers & not some fake politically correct answer that a lot of people give. No one sensible would ever suggest you do that. But it's also narrow minded for you to just accept those options as your fate without making any more effort. Again, what're you doing about it? How is going from a 5'10" white dude to a 5'6" Indian dude an extreme example? 5'10" is a frequently used baseline for "minimum" height requirement. 5'6" is a significant deviation away from that. My point is that if they have rigid requirements on their preferences, so will they in real life. I don't disagree. However, if they can't find success with their rigid requirements, eventually they'll have to accept the fate of the market themselves and lower them. There's women on Match.com that have a lot of 'no preference' on their stats. They are the ones likely to be more forgiving in real life. Likely? Perhaps. Just because 1). they don't have criteria stated doesn't mean they don't care. For example, I'm really only attracted to white girls. I don't have that stated in my profile because I'm open to the idea of dating someone of a different race, I just haven't been that interested in any so far. The same goes for anyone who doesn't want to seem discriminatory about race, weight, height, income, personality, etc, so they don't list it, they just might not give consideration to those people if they reach out. and 2). just because they do list a criteria doesn't mean it's steadfast or as rigid as you think. One of my favorite things to do to girls who have the "6'0"+" height requirement is to respond to their message with "Thanks so much for your message but I see you're looking for a guy who's 6'+ and as you can see, I'm only 5'10." Sorry!" I pull that whenever a girl has some requirement that's clearly stated, yet disregards it by messaging. It annoys me. Or perhaps you mean that guys who meet all of the basic requirements and have decent profiles still get rejected in OLD because women have so many options that it's like submitting resumes to a job. I think the "women have so many options" thing is a bit circumspect. While they may have "many" options, what I often hear is that only small percentage of those options are actually any decent. As I said earlier, most people are just mediocre, nothing to write home about. Yet we all think we deserve someone spectacular, even if we don't bring anything to the table ourselves. Combine that with the catalog nature of OLD where people get to pick and choose the best things. No kid looks through the catalog and circles the worst, boring toys for Christmas. They circle the best ones. Everything else is just filler. Just pick whatever subject you do best in so you can graduate with the least amount of stress and effort- seriously it hardly matters what your major is these days. Respectfully disagree. If he just picks whatever easy subject will expedite graduation, he's setting himself up for a lifetime of unhappiness doing a job he hates. I don't see how that will help him. I saw all I needed to see with match.com. Women that are like 5'3" still want a guy that's 5'8" minimum. And if they don't care much about height they ask for a guy with 6 figure income. It's insane so I don't know why I even bother. It's doing more harm than good for me I feel. I genuinely feel unless I get a good job which bothers me that a huge part of the reason they would be with me is due to that I won't wind up with anyone. I know this is extremely harsh, but if you want women that badly, and women need a short guy to have six figure income that badly, then what's stopping you from doing what you need to do to get a six figure income doing something you like? I'm not saying enter a career you don't want to, but at some point you have to accept the Darwinism of this situation. You can do something to get the things you want, bust your ass, figure out how to make it work, and be successful. Find a niche. The person who finds a niche will be the one who gets rewarded. To the victor go the spoils, better hope it's you. Get your claws out, because it isn't an easy fight. If you don't succeed, fair enough -- at least you tried. But you can't expect any sympathy or benefit of the doubt if you expect the world to cater to you, and/or don't try to do anything about your problems other than complain. That's just the way the world works. I can sympathize with you, others will too, but collective sympathy won't be so pragmatic that it sways womens' opinions in your favor. You have to do something. OP, you've got a lot of threads and posts, so it's possible I've missed some critical details. However, I must still ask: What do you bring to the table? I'd be curious to know as well. Link to post Share on other sites
Author NJ123 Posted September 16, 2016 Author Share Posted September 16, 2016 It's weird that you won't list your requirements Personally attracted to Good personality/chemistry Only drinks sometimes but not every week. But not to the point where she gets drunk. I'd be fine with it if she smokes occssionally but not regularly. Never been promiscuous at any point. Ideally her age would be from 23-35. But I'd be fine dating a woman up until her early 40s. I'd be fine if she was divorced but depends on why she got divorced. No kids. Never been into drugs nor an alcoholic at any point. Link to post Share on other sites
Author NJ123 Posted September 16, 2016 Author Share Posted September 16, 2016 Am I correct in understanding that you aren't currently working or steadily employed? That's going to be a deal-breaker for most women your age and it has nothing to do with them only desiring a man with a six-figure income. This says nothing of your character, but you have to look at things from a prospective date's vantage. You aren't working. You live at home at an age where a lot of people are either established in their career or heading down that pathway. You don't drive much and have issues with traveling very far from your home (i.e. outside of your immediate surroundings). You have an associate's degree, but not a bachelor's and you currently have nothing in motion to change that. Most guys outside of the extremely good looking or charming would find it a rough go to net quality women with the above circumstances. You seem fixated on some small details such as your height and your inexperience with women, but I get the sense that the issues I outlined above are bigger factors in your lack of dating success. I am working at the moment but it's not the job I ideally want to be at. I have health issues that I'm trying really hard to get fixed so it's holding me back. The problem is I'll never know for certainty that they'll get fixed since no doctor has been able to help me yet. Link to post Share on other sites
JuneJulySeptember Posted September 16, 2016 Share Posted September 16, 2016 Likely? Perhaps. Just because 1). they don't have criteria stated doesn't mean they don't care. For example, I'm really only attracted to white girls. I don't have that stated in my profile because I'm open to the idea of dating someone of a different race, I just haven't been that interested in any so far. The same goes for anyone who doesn't want to seem discriminatory about race, weight, height, income, personality, etc, so they don't list it, they just might not give consideration to those people if they reach out. Exactly right. And I actually do respect you for that because like I pointed out, 70% have a rigid racial preference. Even of the women that have no preference, I can only assume that maybe a quarter or a third or maybe even a half do actually have a strong preference. So, that means by my calculations that about 10-15% of women are really open to dating all ethnicities/races. That does not bring sunshine to my day. I mean, it's whatever you know. But it is what it is. Link to post Share on other sites
Author NJ123 Posted September 16, 2016 Author Share Posted September 16, 2016 Yeah, that's the way it is. If you want a girl, you have to live up to their standards, or be good enough that they want to live up to yours. What're you doing about it? No one sensible would ever suggest you do that. But it's also narrow minded for you to just accept those options as your fate without making any more effort. Again, what're you doing about it? 5'10" is a frequently used baseline for "minimum" height requirement. 5'6" is a significant deviation away from that. I don't disagree. However, if they can't find success with their rigid requirements, eventually they'll have to accept the fate of the market themselves and lower them. Likely? Perhaps. Just because 1). they don't have criteria stated doesn't mean they don't care. For example, I'm really only attracted to white girls. I don't have that stated in my profile because I'm open to the idea of dating someone of a different race, I just haven't been that interested in any so far. The same goes for anyone who doesn't want to seem discriminatory about race, weight, height, income, personality, etc, so they don't list it, they just might not give consideration to those people if they reach out. and 2). just because they do list a criteria doesn't mean it's steadfast or as rigid as you think. One of my favorite things to do to girls who have the "6'0"+" height requirement is to respond to their message with "Thanks so much for your message but I see you're looking for a guy who's 6'+ and as you can see, I'm only 5'10." Sorry!" I pull that whenever a girl has some requirement that's clearly stated, yet disregards it by messaging. It annoys me. I think the "women have so many options" thing is a bit circumspect. While they may have "many" options, what I often hear is that only small percentage of those options are actually any decent. As I said earlier, most people are just mediocre, nothing to write home about. Yet we all think we deserve someone spectacular, even if we don't bring anything to the table ourselves. Combine that with the catalog nature of OLD where people get to pick and choose the best things. No kid looks through the catalog and circles the worst, boring toys for Christmas. They circle the best ones. Everything else is just filler. Respectfully disagree. If he just picks whatever easy subject will expedite graduation, he's setting himself up for a lifetime of unhappiness doing a job he hates. I don't see how that will help him. I know this is extremely harsh, but if you want women that badly, and women need a short guy to have six figure income that badly, then what's stopping you from doing what you need to do to get a six figure income doing something you like? I'm not saying enter a career you don't want to, but at some point you have to accept the Darwinism of this situation. You can do something to get the things you want, bust your ass, figure out how to make it work, and be successful. Find a niche. The person who finds a niche will be the one who gets rewarded. To the victor go the spoils, better hope it's you. Get your claws out, because it isn't an easy fight. If you don't succeed, fair enough -- at least you tried. But you can't expect any sympathy or benefit of the doubt if you expect the world to cater to you, and/or don't try to do anything about your problems other than complain. That's just the way the world works. I can sympathize with you, others will too, but collective sympathy won't be so pragmatic that it sways womens' opinions in your favor. You have to do something. I'd be curious to know as well. Because I don't want the main reason for a woman to be with me is due to my job. I'd want the woman to be with me because they really like me not because of some superficial reasoning being the deciding factor. I do want to get a better job & try to better myself but I wouldn't do it for a woman but for myself. But in terms of dating I'd be upset if all of a sudden I go back on OLD than all of a sudden a lot of women would be giving me a chance just due to making more money. And I know it would be due to that because right now I'm hardly getting any attention. I get tons of profile views & a decent amount of likes on OKCupid but that doesn't mean anything when I can't even see who liked me unless I pay money for the feature. Link to post Share on other sites
NewLeaf512 Posted September 16, 2016 Share Posted September 16, 2016 Personally attracted to Good personality/chemistry Only drinks sometimes but not every week. But not to the point where she gets drunk. I'd be fine with it if she smokes occssionally but not regularly. Never been promiscuous at any point. Ideally her age would be from 23-35. But I'd be fine dating a woman up until her early 40s. I'd be fine if she was divorced but depends on why she got divorced. No kids. Never been into drugs nor an alcoholic at any point. It's the attraction part that will be telling I think. Link to post Share on other sites
NewLeaf512 Posted September 16, 2016 Share Posted September 16, 2016 Because I don't want the main reason for a woman to be with me is due to my job. I'd want the woman to be with me because they really like me not because of some superficial reasoning being the deciding factor. I do want to get a better job & try to better myself but I wouldn't do it for a woman but for myself. But in terms of dating I'd be upset if all of a sudden I go back on OLD than all of a sudden a lot of women would be giving me a chance just due to making more money. And I know it would be due to that because right now I'm hardly getting any attention. I get tons of profile views & a decent amount of likes on OKCupid but that doesn't mean anything when I can't even see who liked me unless I pay money for the feature. I don't use OLD so can you explain? You don't pay money so you can't see who liked you? How do you connect with women then? Link to post Share on other sites
Author NJ123 Posted September 16, 2016 Author Share Posted September 16, 2016 I don't use OLD so can you explain? You don't pay money so you can't see who liked you? How do you connect with women then? You have to pay money for the extra feature of seeing who liked you on there. And I'm not spending any money on these sites. And just because they swiped to like me doesn't mean anything when they don't even view my profile before hand. You can message women on there for free, but there's some features that you have to pay extra for. Link to post Share on other sites
Author NJ123 Posted September 16, 2016 Author Share Posted September 16, 2016 It's the attraction part that will be telling I think. What do you mean exactly? If I were to guess you think that the women I find attractive are the ones that most guys would find attractive? Link to post Share on other sites
normal person Posted September 16, 2016 Share Posted September 16, 2016 Because I don't want the main reason for a woman to be with me is due to my job. Yeah, in a perfect world with infinite resources where things like money were of no concern to people and their kids would grow up in safety, comfort, health, and happiness no matter what you did for a living, women wouldn't care what you did. However, the world isn't like that, hence why women are more attracted to men with nice jobs and the ability to provide. Likely a nice job won't be the main reason a woman is with you, but it might be the main reason she even considers you to begin with -- a foot in the door, so to speak. I'd want the woman to be with me because they really like me not because of some superficial reasoning being the deciding factor. And how's that been working out for you so far? Wishful thinking. People are superficial. They aren't going to drop it because it's unfair or one person doesn't like it. You need to adapt or they'll pass you by without mercy. I do want to get a better job & try to better myself but I wouldn't do it for a woman but for myself. That's good. You should be happy with what you do above all else. But in terms of dating I'd be upset if all of a sudden I go back on OLD than all of a sudden a lot of women would be giving me a chance just due to making more money. Yeah, it's not the best feeling to be objectified or thought of as a wallet. But the thing is, you can't assume they're just in it for the cash. Many women like what it represents: you're smart, ambitious, driven, successful, etc. And I know it would be due to that because right now I'm hardly getting any attention. I get tons of profile views & a decent amount of likes on OKCupid but that doesn't mean anything when I can't even see who liked me unless I pay money for the feature. So why not pay money for the feature? It's $30/month or something right? A dollar a day. And not to be rude, but if that's the kind of thing that's above your budget, then the "money" issue ceases to be a superficial one and the issue becomes one of basic minimum lifestyle requirement for a girl. A woman on OLD probably doesn't expect you to be rich, but she probably won't go out with you if you can't afford some minimal expenses either, especially if you're beyond your late 20s/early 30s. To do well in OLD you need to meet some basic level of financial, professional, physical, etc, qualification. Link to post Share on other sites
Author NJ123 Posted September 16, 2016 Author Share Posted September 16, 2016 Yeah, in a perfect world with infinite resources where things like money were of no concern to people and their kids would grow up in safety, comfort, health, and happiness no matter what you did for a living, women wouldn't care what you did. However, the world isn't like that, hence why women are more attracted to men with nice jobs and the ability to provide. Likely a nice job won't be the main reason a woman is with you, but it might be the main reason she even considers you to begin with -- a foot in the door, so to speak. And how's that been working out for you so far? Wishful thinking. People are superficial. They aren't going to drop it because it's unfair or one person doesn't like it. You need to adapt or they'll pass you by without mercy. That's good. You should be happy with what you do above all else. Yeah, it's not the best feeling to be objectified or thought of as a wallet. But the thing is, you can't assume they're just in it for the cash. Many women like what it represents: you're smart, ambitious, driven, successful, etc. So why not pay money for the feature? It's $30/month or something right? A dollar a day. And not to be rude, but if that's the kind of thing that's above your budget, then the "money" issue ceases to be a superficial one and the issue becomes one of basic minimum lifestyle requirement for a girl. A woman on OLD probably doesn't expect you to be rich, but she probably won't go out with you if you can't afford some minimal expenses either, especially if you're beyond your late 20s/early 30s. To do well in OLD you need to meet some basic level of financial, professional, physical, etc, qualification. 1. But it is the main reason if they wouldn't even give you a chance without it. If everything else was legit the same about you as a person & let's say you make 25 grand a year instead of 60 grand than they wouldn't date you specifically due to that. So yeah, I'd say it is the main reason or at the least way on top of the list. I almost feel like when I do get a better job eventually that women are going to be out to get me in terms of wanting me more for my money instead of me as a person which scares me. I feel I'll get paranoid about it that they just want me because I make good money. 2. But I don't get how a lot of people get into relationships like that due to superficialness. Like why do rich guys put up with getting with women that are clearly with them for their money? I'd just never understand that since deep down the guy has to know unless he's completely clueless that the woman is mainly with him for his resources & power & not for him as a person. I'd have more respect for myself than to let some woman use me for my money. 3. And yes I'd do it all for myself & not for any other reason. 4. And that's what I mean. It feels like the job is more important than you as a person. I just don't get that at all. 5. I just don't want to pay for these sites after seeing how much shallowness there is on these places. For instance why would I bother paying $50 a month or whatever it is for match.com when I'm disqualified right from the start from about 90% of the women on there because they deem me as too short or don't make good enough money for them. I'd literally be throwing my money away. Link to post Share on other sites
AMJ Posted September 16, 2016 Share Posted September 16, 2016 Respectfully disagree. If he just picks whatever easy subject will expedite graduation, he's setting himself up for a lifetime of unhappiness doing a job he hates. I don't see how that will help him. Yeah, I know. I think I was getting irritated in general and need to learn to keep my opinions to myself when that's the case. I'd just said in a previous post that men who can problem solve and take care of themselves are attractive to women. A problem-solver would find that there are ample resources out there in the world to help people find a career path and college major. Asking a complete stranger on the internet about what to major in seems like giving up to me. OP seems to want to put absolutely no effort into his own happiness. This victim mentality above all else is really what's holding him back in more ways than one. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
AMJ Posted September 16, 2016 Share Posted September 16, 2016 OP every time you find an example of a woman having unfair standards- such as herself being 5'3'' and wanting a guy who is at least 5'9'', I can give you a similar list of double standards that men have against women. For example men who themselves do not have great bodies- overweight, lacking any muscle tone, or super skinny- who try to date or only want to date women who have amazing bodies. We can all point to examples of life not being fair. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author NJ123 Posted September 17, 2016 Author Share Posted September 17, 2016 Yeah, I know. I think I was getting irritated in general and need to learn to keep my opinions to myself when that's the case. I'd just said in a previous post that men who can problem solve and take care of themselves are attractive to women. A problem-solver would find that there are ample resources out there in the world to help people find a career path and college major. Asking a complete stranger on the internet about what to major in seems like giving up to me. OP seems to want to put absolutely no effort into his own happiness. This victim mentality above all else is really what's holding him back in more ways than one. When did I ever ask you specifically what I should major in? Now you're putting words in my mouth. I just said I wasn't sure what I wanted to take up yet. And only asked you if you've ever taken online college classes before. And I am seriously considering taking classes in the winter, I'm not lying or exaggerating about it. I'm just really trying to decide on what I'd want to major in. Or at the least I could take some in general required classes first to get them out of the way in the beginning while deciding what I'd want to do. I get that you're trying to help, but it always seems like you're doing it in an extremely harsh way. Link to post Share on other sites
Author NJ123 Posted September 17, 2016 Author Share Posted September 17, 2016 (edited) OP every time you find an example of a woman having unfair standards- such as herself being 5'3'' and wanting a guy who is at least 5'9'', I can give you a similar list of double standards that men have against women. For example men who themselves do not have great bodies- overweight, lacking any muscle tone, or super skinny- who try to date or only want to date women who have amazing bodies. We can all point to examples of life not being fair. But in terms of the height it goes to extremes at least with OLD. As I said there's absolutely no point for me to pay $50 a month to go on match.com when I'm automatically disqualified from at least 80% of the women on there. I admit hearing about this whole height thing really made me really insecure about it a long time ago, & I'm fine with my height now but it's just depressing in general how my height disqualifies me automatically from so many women when it's not even anything I have control over. I suppose I wouldn't want to be with a woman like that anyway. And me personally I don't care about a woman having an amazing body. Of course I'd love for her to have an amazing body, but I'd be perfectly content as long as she isn't too thin or too overweight. I find curvy women really attractive. Edited September 17, 2016 by NJ123 Link to post Share on other sites
AMJ Posted September 17, 2016 Share Posted September 17, 2016 When did I ever ask you specifically what I should major in? Now you're putting words in my mouth. I just said I wasn't sure what I wanted to take up yet. And only asked you if you've ever taken online college classes before. And I am seriously considering taking classes in the winter, I'm not lying or exaggerating about it. I'm just really trying to decide on what I'd want to major in. Or at the least I could take some in general required classes first to get them out of the way in the beginning while deciding what I'd want to do. I get that you're trying to help, but it always seems like you're doing it in an extremely harsh way. Because you're not absorbing what people are saying to you...it makes me feel like the message needs to get more harsh for you to hear it. And regarding the height thing, again as I said, every time you bring up an example of something that you think is unfair, I can match it...a good friend of mine has your opposite issue. She's 6 feet tall and weighs 250 lbs. She's always been that size, even in her early 20s. She eats healthy and exercises all the time, there really is nothing she can do to change her size. Do you think she has an easy time meeting men? No, she does not. She's extremely smart, successful, funny, kind, and one of the best people I know. She rarely complains about her reality even though it causes her a lot of pain. There are people in the world who don't have life so miraculously easy, you are not the only person out there who has a difficult time dating. You make mountains out of molehills. That's all. I'll just keep my opinions to myself from now on. Best of luck NJ! 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts