Flip flops on dates

[Wayne0789456]

I seem to be having trouble getting serious answers to this question, so I thought I would try a group forum like this.

 

Why do women wear flip flops, specifically flip flops, on dates?

 

It makes absolute sense to wear a flat slide sandal on a date, they're comfortable and easy to wear, but why flip flops, specifically, instead of any one of many other flat slide sandals that look nice?

 

Why not flat slide sandals such as (but not limited to) the links below, that look nice? Why the reversion to something that does not look nice?

 

[]

Edited September 17, 2016 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Redacted URLs ~6

[Arieswoman]

OP I don't know anyone (male or female) who wears flip-flops to dates.

 

Here in UK the weather is so unpredictable that no-one would chance such footwear for an evening out.

 

Sorry I can't help you any further.

[leogirl876]

Is she Indian? I notice a lot of Indian people wearing those. If she's not, who knows, maybe they're comfortable and she has foot problems. Either way, is this going to be a deal breaker for you? Men wear white tennis shoes with regular pants, so it's no different.

[GemmaUK]

I dunno.

 

Personally, I can't stand flip flops.

 

I work with several women who wear them day in day out over the summer and will do until about mid October.

 

They sound horrible,

These women complain all summer long of foot, leg and back pain.

Plus they don't even care for their feet - lovely white hard skin all over for all to see - ewww!

 

Look after your feets or cover them up.

 

They're fine for a sunbed to beach but no good for feet or walking.

[Wayne0789456]

I see that my links were moderated out, but to try my best with words, I had a link to a photograph of a two-strap Birkenstock type, a couple of different cross-strap types, one with a wide upper near the toes, a three-strap t-strap, and another two-strap type with the one strap near the toes and the other strap further back at the bottom of the ankle. There are many, many other examples out there of flat slide sandals that look infinitely nicer than flip flops, but these were just a few that I found quickly to make my point.

 

Is she Indian?

 

No.. I have never dated an Indian woman. These are all American women. It's not just during Summer, either. Even sometimes on a warm day in winter on an extremely casual date, with pants and a sweater. It's still possible to be dressed ultra-casually and look nice at the same time, I'm just trying to understand why the reversion back to that one single style when so many others look nicer.

 

is this going to be a deal breaker for you?

 

I'm not sure it's a "deal-breaker". I get tired of seeing them every single time there is an excuse to wear them, and it doesn't help that there is little variance from them in everyone else around me, either.

 

Men wear white tennis shoes with regular pants, so it's no different.

 

Interesting comment. I do not own white tennis shoes, but I have infrequently worn tennis shoes with dressier pants, let's say if it was better to dress up but not imperative to do so, if there was a lot of walking, it seems like an appropriate compromise. If I could ask, is what you just described an annoyance for most women? I have no problem avoiding certain combinations that do not look nice to my dates.

[JewelD]

I've never heard of a man who cared that much what a woman was wearing on her feet.

 

If it's that big of a deal, just don't date them.

[angel.eyes]

First, are we talking cute little strappy bejeweled leather flip flops that show off your pedicure? Or the cheap rubber crap out of the bin at the local dollar store or Old Navy?

 

Second, are you suggesting that Birkenstock sandals would be more appealing to you than flip flops? I'm beyond confused on that one. Please clarify.

 

One way to prevent flip flops showing up on a date would be to avoid the ultra casual spots you reference going to for dates. I have yet to see anyone show up to a nice restaurant or wine bar in flip flops...or sneakers, for that matter.

 

The type of date often dictates the footwear.

[angel.eyes]

I've never heard of a man who cared that much what a woman was wearing on her feet.

 

If it's that big of a deal, just don't date them.

 

 

Enough to waste time hunting down multiple images too!

 

Since it's so, important to you OP, mention that they should not wear flip flops when you ask them out on these ultra casual dates you plan. Of course, you may have fewer dates and get stood up more frequently if the date is predicated on a footwear requirement. Such is life. We don't get everything we want.

[GemmaUK]

Maybe it's down to what their feet can tolerate.

 

Birkies aren't a great answer for not ripping your feet apart.

Soft feet and Birkies are not a good match - too much blood involved!!

[Gr8fuln2020]

I live in a part of the country where many people wear flip flops. Warm, sunny, humid and plenty of beaches, but none of my dates have worn flip flops. I prefer casual dates and even then, no flip flops.

 

Could it be a sign that there is less interest or less seriousness?

[Nowty V]

I've never heard of a man who cared that much what a woman was wearing on her feet.

 

You've not dated anyone with foot fetish then?

 

I have a kind of feet thing but I wouldn't say a full blown fetish.

 

Flip Flops on a date are *HoT* , I wouldn't be disappointed.

[Gr8fuln2020]

I've never heard of a man who cared that much what a woman was wearing on her feet.

 

If it's that big of a deal, just don't date them.

 

I don't have a fetish, but I find women's feet can be attractive. If you're going to show them off, it tells a person a lot about hygeine, a little bit about lifestyle, etc. The prettier the toes, the likely the more feminine. I prefer more "feminine", pedicured feet.

[leogirl876]

 

Interesting comment. I do not own white tennis shoes, but I have infrequently worn tennis shoes with dressier pants, let's say if it was better to dress up but not imperative to do so, if there was a lot of walking, it seems like an appropriate compromise. If I could ask, is what you just described an annoyance for most women? I have no problem avoiding certain combinations that do not look nice to my dates.

 

An annoyance for woman? I guess it depends on the age of women you're talking about. When I was in my 20s that was the first thing we girls would look at, well the second, first we'd look at his face & body and if he was cute then we'd look at his shoes. If he had a nice outfit on but had white tennis shoes, we wouldn't go out with him. Now that I'm older (40) I don't care if he wears white tennis shoes or not, there's so many more important things than that.

[JewelD]

I don't have a fetish, but I find women's feet can be attractive. If you're going to show them off, it tells a person a lot about hygeine, a little bit about lifestyle, etc. The prettier the toes, the likely the more feminine. I prefer more "feminine", pedicured feet.

 

Feet, sure, but her footwear seems to be what's bothering the OP, not the actual condition of her feet.

[Gr8fuln2020]

Feet, sure, but her footwear seems to be what's bothering the OP, not the actual condition of her feet.

 

Good point. It sounds to me that he feels the ladies should be less casual and more formal even if open-toed.

[Gr8fuln2020]

I seem to be having trouble getting serious answers to this question, so I thought I would try a group forum like this.

 

Why do women wear flip flops, specifically flip flops, on dates?

 

It makes absolute sense to wear a flat slide sandal on a date, they're comfortable and easy to wear, but why flip flops, specifically, instead of any one of many other flat slide sandals that look nice?

 

Why not flat slide sandals such as (but not limited to) the links below, that look nice? Why the reversion to something that does not look nice?

 

[]

 

Do you live on a coast where is sand, etc. ? Could it be that, aside from comfort, it is also something convenient and practical? A nice walk along the beach...well, better in flip flops then less comfortable strap-on sandals or shoes.

[Wayne0789456]

First, are we talking cute little strappy bejeweled leather flip flops that show off your pedicure? Or the cheap rubber crap out of the bin at the local dollar store or Old Navy?

 

I respect that the intention of some flip flops is to be "cute", but they do not appear to me that way, it's still the same design. They might appear to me as intended, if the base style wasn't so overworn like a uniform piece. I'm so tired of them that they all look ugly. Too much of a good thing, I guess.

 

Second, are you suggesting that Birkenstock sandals would be more appealing to you than flip flops? I'm beyond confused on that one. Please clarify

 

Yes. They're not elegant, not overly "sexy", and just as ultra-casual as flip flops, but more of a piece of street footwear than pool or beach footwear, so yes, they absolutely do look nicer than flip flops.

 

One way to prevent flip flops showing up on a date would be to avoid the ultra casual spots you reference going to for dates. I have yet to see anyone show up to a nice restaurant or wine bar in flip flops...or sneakers, for that matter.

 

The type of date often dictates the footwear.

 

Okay...you are suggesting that dates get planned for the express purpose of avoiding a single piece of footwear???? How do we see fireworks on the Fourth of July, then, for example? Most dates, nor I for that matter, want to do dressy or formal every single time. I do like a mix. It would just be helpful if there was a way to express that I loathe flip flops, in the same way that I can freely say that I do not enjoy eating baked potatoes, or that horseback riding does not appeal to me, or that I cannot stand snow. I can say all of these with no problem, but I dare not say that I do not like flip flops because they take it as a personal attack.

 

Maybe we can expand on that. I can tell someone how much I hate baked potatoes, and no offense taken, even if it's their favorite food. I can tell someone that I would have a terrible time going horseback riding, and no offense taken, even if they can't do enough of it. I can tell someone that I cannot stand snow, and once again, no offense taken, even if their favorite season is winter. I can tell someone that a particular building looks ugly, even if that type of architecture appears beautiful to them, no offense taken once again. And so many other things. But, I dare not say that I cannot stand flip flops, because they'll take it as a personal attack, even if they're not wearing them. It seems messed up to me, maybe some clarification can be offered.

 

Maybe it's down to what their feet can tolerate.

 

Birkies aren't a great answer for not ripping your feet apart.

Soft feet and Birkies are not a good match - too much blood involved!!

 

That's fine. Sorry to hear that if that's your case. But, there are multitudes of other choices besides flip flops and Birkenstocks. That's the point. Why the focus on about the only pair of flat slide sandal that does not look nice while ignoring all of the fifty (or more) other styles that DO look nice.

 

I live in a part of the country where many people wear flip flops. Warm, sunny, humid and plenty of beaches, but none of my dates have worn flip flops. I prefer casual dates and even then, no flip flops.

 

Very rare. I see you get the point that ultra-ultra-casual can also look nice.

 

Could it be a sign that there is less interest or less seriousness?

 

That idea is in my head. But, if they feel that the date is not worth anything nicer than flip flops to begin with, then why not just tell me the truth instead of wasting time and effort? Makes no sense.

 

her footwear seems to be what's bothering the OP, not the actual condition of her feet.

 

Just to the extent that this one specific piece of footwear looks sooo bad that....as an example, dates have shown up in, say, a pretty skirt, but wore flip flops so as to be sure the outfit is casual. That is fine. Can be awesome, actually. But, the flip flops cancel out the thought she put in to her look, and she no longer looks pretty, only on account ofthe flip flops. I'm sure she can't feel too good, thinking i didn't notice her effort to look nice otherwise for our date, but given what I just mentioned there is nothing to compliment, either. I wish I could express my hatred for flip flops early on before it comes out the wrong way, or whatever.

Save

Save

[GemmaUK]

I hate flip flops but love baked potatoes, snow and horseback riding...

 

Hey ho!

Not everyone is a match I guess!

[Wayne0789456]

It sounds to me that he feels the ladies should be less casual and more formal even if open-toed.

 

Not at all. It's too bad that the moderators removed the links I included in my original post. The alternatives are totally INappropriate for formal, and possibly even business casual at that. They are nearly identically ultra-casual, it's just that they look nice.

 

Do you live on a coast where is sand, etc. ? Could it be that, aside from comfort, it is also something convenient and practical? A nice walk along the beach...well, better in flip flops then less comfortable strap-on sandals or shoes.

 

I am at least 300 miles from the nearest ocean, and over 100 miles from the nearest great lake, for that matter. I am five miles from a river, but considering that the sandy beach is at most four or five inches wide, I don't think I will be taking a date for a walk there any time soon.

 

But, yes, for the situation you described then flip flops are most appropriate, but honestly they've been worn to the point that they look bad even for that anymore.

[central]

I dislike the cheap flip-flops, unless we're at the beach. On a date? It would seem like a lack of interest, unless the flip-flops and the rest of her wardrobe come off quickly and easily as soon as we're alone.

[Gloria25]

I dislike the cheap flip-flops, unless we're at the beach. On a date? It would seem like a lack of interest.

 

Yep, exactly....

 

I go to chain restaurants, the mall, etc...and don't get how couples dress so casual. They look like they are wearing house clothes. I am not one of those people that dress up, but on a date and/or when I'm with a guy I put effort into looking nice.

 

It's not that hard. If you don't have or care to slip on a decent pair of shoes then, for me that's lack of interest. Like you just rolled out of bed and embarked on meeting me.

 

If it's warm, you can use flats, sandals, and Crocs has so much variety of jelly like shoes, flats, sandals, etc too.

[Wayne0789456]

Any suggestions, anyone, on how to politely express my dislike for flip flops, as a general concept, in the same way I can express my dislike for a particular activity or food item, without them changing my meaning to "you are not allowed to wear flip flops"?

[JewelD]

Any suggestions, anyone, on how to politely express my dislike for flip flops, as a general concept, in the same way I can express my dislike for a particular activity or food item, without them changing my meaning to "you are not allowed to wear flip flops"?

 

No, because there isn't a polite way to say that. I question where you're searching for women that this has apparently become a 'trend'. Are you approaching women wearing flip flops? Are these college girls or athletes just leaving practice? Seems very weird.

 

If you don't like what someone is wearing, don't date them again. You can't express your dislike for an outfit the same way you express your dislike of cheese and horseback riding. People tend to dress in a way they feel comfortable with. What response would you even be expecting? "Okay, I won't wear them again?" No, they're just never going to return your calls.

 

If you have a dating profile, you can post 'NO FLIP FLOPS' there, but other than that, you'll just have to weed out the dozens of flip floppers you encounter.

[Wayne0789456]

I question where you're searching for women that this has apparently become a 'trend'. Are you approaching women wearing flip flops?

 

Most of my searching right now is online dating sites. If I was in a group setting, like s speeddating event or a dance, I honestly would skip over those who are wearing flip flops.

 

Here's the thing, let's say we're out shopping, she wants me to come along with her clothes-shopping for an opinion (that has happened a few times with me, not sure what other guys' experiences are), she sees, I don't know, a skirt she likes, and asks what I think of it with a certain top and "those flip flops". What do you say when the flip flops ruin the entire outfit when the skirt and top otherwise look awesome?

 

What response would you even be expecting? "Okay, I won't wear them again?"

 

Not quite that. I'll reverse the situation, it is revealed that she does not like, I don't know, brown pants, to pick something out of the air. She does not say "Please do not wear brown pants", or "you look terrible in brown pants", but "I can't seem to make brown pants work in my eye on myself or anyone else in any outfit". Maybe I'm more laid back on this than 99% of all other people, but I would not take personal offense at this. Now, I am not going to wear something INappropriate to avoid brown pants, but if another color is appropriate, I will, by choice, choose a different color. She's not attempting to control me or dictate what I wear. I want to look nice for my date, and if brown pants do not look nice to her, then they do not look nice. Period. Why wear them?

 

Having said that, is it far-fetched to think there are women who feel the same? The difficulty is in trying to find one.

 

If you have a dating profile, you can post 'NO FLIP FLOPS' there, but other than that, you'll just have to weed out the dozens of flip floppers you encounter.

 

Flip flops have been worn so often on dates, not to mention on the street, that it is starting to seem as though a woman who never, literally never, wears flip flops away from the pool or the beach is rare of she exists at all.

 

Isn't withholding something that I hate as fiercely as I do flip flops a form of lying?

[GunslingerRoland]

I don't really see many women dressing up with flip flops on, must be a regional thing. I find them to be kind of silly besides at the beach/pool though, neither comfortable nor fashionable. But I'm not particularly offended by them either.

 

 

But them again I'm another weird foot guy, who would just be happy to check out her feet.