Ex-Girlfriend wants to be friends still

[dumbass2]

Sorry, i would have told her to F off once she offered that. IMO you two are totally done now because of the fact she would even offer that. She doesn't think much about you or the relationship you had. You are in no state of mind to be talking with her because of your feelings for her, but you probably will continue and may even see her. I know it's hard. Been there done that. Learn the hard the way if you have no past experience to go on. Only way it really sticks and only way you truly learn.

[Pete2304]

So did you go see her?

[Ryza]

Hey guys, basically my ex broke up with me in June and told me she doesnt feel the same way anymore, I was heartbroken and decided to block her and try to get myself to a better place, on multiple occasions now she has messaged me wanting to ask how I am and telling me stuff that shes going through, I felt as though my heart was being played with so I blocked her.

However in september she messaged me saying she never fell out of love with me and that she misses me and is going through traumatic stuff. Because I care and still love her I decided to speak to her, she has given me many mixed signals that she still wants to get together like; Addressing herself as my girlfriend to a couple online friends, she would say thing slike ugh why am I dating you in a joking way, she says I love you before she goes to bed every night. However I asked her recently what she felt and she said she doesnt know and doesnt want to date or hookup with anyone right now. She said she wants to be friends but I cant do this because I am deeply in love with her and it hurts to try and be friends. If I told her I need to leave and move on she gets really hysterical and then threatens/attempts to commit suicide. Any advice on what I should do?

[LargoLagg]

If I told her I need to leave and move on she gets really hysterical and then threatens/attempts to commit suicide. Any advice on what I should do?

Kiss of death for me. Tell her you're done with her, that you would never be with a person who could harm herself and if you hear that threat again, hang up the phone, call 911 and report what she said. Then block her forever.

 

You need to get rid of this one, she's poison.

[Ryza]

Kiss of death for me. Tell her you're done with her, that you would never be with a person who could harm herself and if you hear that threat again, hang up the phone, call 911 and report what she said. Then block her forever.

 

You need to get rid of this one, she's poison.

 

Im having a hard time seeing why she wants me around so much when she broke up with me? Surely if you end it you don't want anything with that person,

[Ryza]

Hello everyone, I will try and keep it short but no promises haha! I met a girl this time last year long distance and started dating. Things were going amazing but it all slowed down as it does and she started to become hostile and cold until in June she told me she didn't feel the same anymore. I was heartbroken as this was my first love you could say. I blocked her to try and get myself to a happier state.

 

Multiple times she has contacted me telling me about some sort of bad situation that is going on, e.g one was she was kicked out of her house, another was she was in trouble with her friends and the one recently is she is going through abusive things in her family. She messaged me in September and told me about the abuse and that she never fell out of love with me and that she misses me, I decided to start talking to her to make sure she was okay because I still cared about her.

 

She gave me a lot of mixed signals, she would call me every day and speak with me, she told my online friends she was my girlfriend, she engaged sexually with me, she jokingly said why am I dating you on multiple occasions when I was making her laugh and to this day still says I love you every night before she goes to bed. This gave me hope that what I was doing was working and making her come back to me.

 

However when I asked her one night how her feelings were and if she pictured me and her getting back together she said I dont know and that she didnt want to date anyone right now. I was hurt by this and confused, she says now she just wants friends and that I treat her like a girlfriend.

 

I told her I was going to leave to move on properly and heal and she made threats of suicide. She treats me in a very bad way, I suffer from anxiety and she removed and blocked me because she wanted to go to a party cause I was messaging her when my anxiety was hitting full force.

 

She told me Im old enough to deal with my own problems. She stopped calling me as much and made a lot of excuses as to why she could not call. She purposely ignores my messages and will message others. She says Im annoying when I am asking her if she is alright and where she is heading out to.

 

I know a long distance relationship cant work and I need to let go and move on but why am I finding it so hard to? Anyone else had a similar experience like this who can give input. Thank you (there is a lot more to this story that needs to be added but I didnt want to keep it too long)

Edited November 29, 2016 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
added paragraphs and merged 4 threads ~6

[lovemebreakme]

She said we could be friends so I agreed but she would still engage sexually with me and tell me that she loved me, until she no longer felt like that anymore and wanted to just purely be friends, this time around I was really hurt so I decided to go NC, however she has come back 4 times now begging and pleading me to be friends with her, she would say we have been through so much you're my best friend, but due to my feelings I couldn't and blocked her, she would make new accounts to message me through.

 

This girl sounds either extremely emotionally unhealthy or extremely manipulative.

 

If you are finding it hard to detach and stop contact with her, then maybe find some new hobbies, new friends. File a restraining order against her. Anything you can do to just to cut ties with her. This isn't healthy.

[LargoLagg]

I've probably read this a million times, but today, it finally hit me. Please explain this phraseology to me:

 

We've been DATING for [some time] LONG DISTANCE

 

You can call what you've been doing a lot of things, but DATING isn't really one of them, right?

[Been]

I'll make this real easy for you. She doesn't want YOU-she just doesn't want to be ALONE.

One of the biggest mistakes of my life was taking my ex back-she said the same bs-I never fell out of love,didn't know I'd miss you so bad etc. Took her back like an idiot. She was great-for about 3 weeks and then it just reverted back to me somehow not being good enough once again.

She is a manipulator. She knows what and when to say certain things to you. The more you stay in contact the worse it is going to be for you-you won't be able to move on.The only way is complete NC with her.