impeliner Posted September 19, 2016 Share Posted September 19, 2016 I met a guy online. Frankly, he was skeazy online. Called me hot right from the start, made sexual comments, etc. I don't know why, but I gave him my number and we went out to dinner. In person he was shy, polite, and nothing but courteous. After that his texts have ranged from mundane daily stuff to sexts. We have seen each other 4 times and have been sleeping together since the second date. After our last date last week he texted me and admitted he felt awkward around me and was still trying to figure me out. He recently opened up about his ex and said they were living together and discussing marriage 3 months before they broke up, which was 4 months ago. Anyhow, I know he is still very active on the dating websites we're both on. I am, so that's not a bad thing. We were both fairly clear at the beginning that we'd be dating other people but we would inform each other if there was sex. But I tried to set up a 5th date last weekend and he strung me along to the day before blowing me off saying he just wanted to relax at home alone. At that point I sent a nice message along the lines of "alright no big deal have a good weekend." He replied with something innocuous like "Oh I really wish I could have been there with you today" to which I didn't reply. Frankly, I assume he found a new date for the night. Although admittedly when I got on my dating profile that evening he was also on so maybe not. I didn't care too much, I went out with friends instead. The same night he texts me something saying "I like you, but I need to take this slow so I can make sure I can give you what you deserve. Also I am a very private guy and I really do like having a lot of alone time." To me this just reads like a guy who's stringing me along while looking for something better. He texts me daily about routine things in his life but it's all superficial, never anything serious. My position in this is to: chat with him when he chats, but stop thinking of him as any serious dating material. I have 2 more dates with other guys lined up so it's not like I'm hung up on him. I guess my question is this: I am his back burner/good for now girl, yes? Or am I judging him too hard? Sorry this was so long! Link to post Share on other sites
Versacehottie Posted September 19, 2016 Share Posted September 19, 2016 I met a guy online. Frankly, he was skeazy online. Called me hot right from the start, made sexual comments, etc. I don't know why, but I gave him my number and we went out to dinner. In person he was shy, polite, and nothing but courteous. After that his texts have ranged from mundane daily stuff to sexts. We have seen each other 4 times and have been sleeping together since the second date. After our last date last week he texted me and admitted he felt awkward around me and was still trying to figure me out. He recently opened up about his ex and said they were living together and discussing marriage 3 months before they broke up, which was 4 months ago. Anyhow, I know he is still very active on the dating websites we're both on. I am, so that's not a bad thing. We were both fairly clear at the beginning that we'd be dating other people but we would inform each other if there was sex. But I tried to set up a 5th date last weekend and he strung me along to the day before blowing me off saying he just wanted to relax at home alone. At that point I sent a nice message along the lines of "alright no big deal have a good weekend." He replied with something innocuous like "Oh I really wish I could have been there with you today" to which I didn't reply. Frankly, I assume he found a new date for the night. Although admittedly when I got on my dating profile that evening he was also on so maybe not. I didn't care too much, I went out with friends instead. The same night he texts me something saying "I like you, but I need to take this slow so I can make sure I can give you what you deserve. Also I am a very private guy and I really do like having a lot of alone time." To me this just reads like a guy who's stringing me along while looking for something better. He texts me daily about routine things in his life but it's all superficial, never anything serious. My position in this is to: chat with him when he chats, but stop thinking of him as any serious dating material. I have 2 more dates with other guys lined up so it's not like I'm hung up on him. I guess my question is this: I am his back burner/good for now girl, yes? Or am I judging him too hard? Sorry this was so long! he doesn't sound like you should be taking him seriously at all. Look at his actions. I wouldn't invest anything into this guy. Good luck 1 Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted September 19, 2016 Share Posted September 19, 2016 Agreed. I wouldn't take him seriously - the fact that he has recently broken up from a serious relationship and his behavior does not indicate that he's really very serious. I also would not be sleeping with him... If this was indeed the case. Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted September 19, 2016 Share Posted September 19, 2016 Agreed, he is pulling the reins back, this fails....don't waste anymore of your time trying to "figure him out". 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author impeliner Posted September 19, 2016 Author Share Posted September 19, 2016 Thanks guys, my thoughts were the same as yours! On to greener pastures. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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