Spikiera Posted October 1, 2016 Share Posted October 1, 2016 Hi guys, just want to vent a little bit here, super annoyed! I am 32M, went out on a date with a girl (27F) last Saturday (Met on-line). We had decent conversation, had some food and beer, I paid for the bill and drove her home. Texted her saying that it was fun and I enjoyed her company. She agreed and said it was really nice meeting me. I am not the type of guy who is very flirtatious on the first date and I tend to keep a distance and have respect for the woman in front of me. So in terms of chemistry, it was not superb. But I've always done it that way and from my experience girls are fine with that. Anyway, this week we had been texting everyday. At some point I asked her if she would like to go out on the upcoming Sunday, I would like to show her a few nice places in the city. She happily agreed and said that sounds good. I told her I will let her know my plans in a few days and she said great! She also told me that she is actually sick so I told her to rest well and drink lots of water. And I said you gotta get better before our date where she said yes "I know!" (This is Wednesday). Well, at the end of Wednesday, she did not reply to my last message. I was like ok fine, I will just wait until she says something. Friday rolls around, nothing. It's like WTF? So I texted her my plan on Sunday and asked what she thinks of it. Nothing. Whaaaaaat? At no point I was being rude, or been needy. Treated her like a normal gentleman. The least she can do is just say hey sorry I am busy on Sunday. Then I would get the point. But she has to ignore me out of nowhere. Unbelievable. Yes I will get over it but at this time I am pretty pissed haha. Thank you guys for listening lol. Link to post Share on other sites
Gloria25 Posted October 1, 2016 Share Posted October 1, 2016 Wow, I think you smothered her a bit much... I mean, texting every day? Then, I'm confused. You said no chemistry on the first date, but you're ok with it not being superb? What do you mean by holding back on the first date? No kissing? I mean, at this point she either lost interest cuz the first date didn't show chemistry between you two and/or you smothered her after the first date. Sorry. Can you like have someone (like a friend, wingman, matchmaker) come on the dates and watch you from a distance and critique you? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Spikiera Posted October 1, 2016 Author Share Posted October 1, 2016 Wow, I think you smothered her a bit much... I mean, texting every day? Then, I'm confused. You said no chemistry on the first date, but you're ok with it not being superb? What do you mean by holding back on the first date? No kissing? I mean, at this point she either lost interest cuz the first date didn't show chemistry between you two and/or you smothered her after the first date. Sorry. Can you like have someone (like a friend, wingman, matchmaker) come on the dates and watch you from a distance and critique you? How is texting each other everyday "smothering?" We don't text every minute...usually every couple hours. I never said I hold back...I am just not comfortable flirting on the very first date. You could be right that she lost interest from the first date. But there must be some interest if she happily agreed to go out on the second date. Anyway, I found it strange, that's all. Link to post Share on other sites
joseb Posted October 1, 2016 Share Posted October 1, 2016 Everyone is different. But there is no way I would be texting someone I had one so so date with every couple of hours. If she was sick, this may have made it awkward, but it's better to make a date a bit sooner Also, no need to try to sleep with her on first date, but a little flirting to create some chemistry will let her know you are interested (if indeed you are). Often women don't know if they are interested until that happens. Yeah I agree pretty rude her not replying. Some people are like that. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
marxman2015 Posted October 1, 2016 Share Posted October 1, 2016 Yeah she could be rude When she did get back to you, you can clear things up with her. I have met girls like this I asked her out for second date, no response, not until after a week, she told me she was busy with work that she didnt reply and said sorry. LOL, no one is that busy to not reply to a message. When you eat, go to the washroom, before sleep or anytime you check your phone, 5 secs is all it takes. When a woman dont reply for over a day, either you did something rude and got her mad at you, or she isnt interested and she lack courtesy. But hey, it was just one date, just one. You are not too invested, imagine going on 10 dates with a girl and then having her treat you like that, it would hurt alot... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
smudge21 Posted October 1, 2016 Share Posted October 1, 2016 When someone doesn't respond to a text, the only reason they do it is out of choice. End of. Yeah, maybe you didn't step up on the date and show your interest as maybe she was used to, but everyone's different and as much as it's important for you to understand her character, she also has to understand yours. There's two people here - it's not always about her. Just accept that whatever the reasons, she is no longer interested and let this one go. If she ever does get back to you, then you can decide if she's worth seeing again. For me, respect is earned not given. Link to post Share on other sites
Omei Posted October 1, 2016 Share Posted October 1, 2016 Welcome to online dating? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Spikiera Posted October 1, 2016 Author Share Posted October 1, 2016 When someone doesn't respond to a text, the only reason they do it is out of choice. End of. Yeah, maybe you didn't step up on the date and show your interest as maybe she was used to, but everyone's different and as much as it's important for you to understand her character, she also has to understand yours. There's two people here - it's not always about her. Just accept that whatever the reasons, she is no longer interested and let this one go. If she ever does get back to you, then you can decide if she's worth seeing again. For me, respect is earned not given. I get your point. But you have to read my post too. She showed enthusiasm and agreed to come out again. Everything was good and then out of no where she disappears. We are all human beings and why not treat each other with respect? We are all adults. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Spikiera Posted October 1, 2016 Author Share Posted October 1, 2016 Everyone is different. But there is no way I would be texting someone I had one so so date with every couple of hours. If she was sick, this may have made it awkward, but it's better to make a date a bit sooner Also, no need to try to sleep with her on first date, but a little flirting to create some chemistry will let her know you are interested (if indeed you are). Often women don't know if they are interested until that happens. Yeah I agree pretty rude her not replying. Some people are like that. Thanks for the feedback. Yeah, def would be better to set up the date sooner, but she was sick. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Spikiera Posted October 1, 2016 Author Share Posted October 1, 2016 Welcome to online dating? Yeah well, I did online dating for 1.5 years and have met many different women. This is the first time a girl just flat out ignores me. She seemed like a really nice person too. Anyway, it was just me venting. I guess you are right, you see all sort of different people from online dating. Link to post Share on other sites
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