Reading girlfriend's messages

[guild11]

Hello, I wanna share a story of mine,

I have a girlfriend and we are together for a year and half,

It happens to be that she is also my supervisor at work and my boss and her are close friends,

 

When we started dating my boss(she) started to dislike

Me and was overreacting on everything I did,

Also she didn't like the fact that her friend - my GF is dating me and I'm not Jewish.

 

Recently my gf got an offer for a serious governmental job in different city, we talked about it and agreed that she should go for it, now she is on the process for the job.

 

Like 2 weeks ago she said that she talked with my boss about us but haven't gave me blurred explanation.

I took her phone and decided to read their chat about me and went like this -

 

My boss - did you imagined a scenario that he would want to move there with you ? How he received it ?

GF - yes he knows, and he is OK with it, he stays.

My boss - he better be OK with it! Once you move there find yourself a sexy security personal, and real Jewish man.

GF - I know it's not it (me) but I'm really attached to him and I love him.

My boss - do it! (Dump me)

GF - slowly... I still have feelings for him.

My boss - poor guy, that probably gonna break his heart

Meet a guy that you really deserve and everyone around you will love him.also.

 

Obviously I confronted my GF about it, I told her why slowly ? Let's break up now ... instead of being on my side she pretty much turned against me with my boss.

 

She said that she did say so to to make my boss stop annoying her and basically "let her hear what she wants"

She said that she always tell her that she loves me when they talk on the phone.

 

Since then we are still together but I kinda feel distant and lost trust in her, I can't stop thinking about this.

I don't know what to do... I really love her very much.

[Marc878]

Your gf is easily manipulated by others. She may be patronizing her boss but it doesn't smell right.

 

Keep your eyes and ears open. Once she moves long distance relationships usually falter anyway. You're young these things happen even though right now it may seem like it's the end of the world. It isn't. Usually when things don't work out its because they shouldn't.

 

I'd be looking for another position if I were you. Your gf's boss is toxic.

[planning4later]

Your gf is easily manipulated by others. She may be patronizing her boss but it doesn't smell right.

 

Keep your eyes and ears open. Once she moves long distance relationships usually falter anyway. You're young these things happen even though right now it may seem like it's the end of the world. It isn't. Usually when things don't work out its because they shouldn't.

 

I'd be looking for another position if I were you. Your gf's boss is toxic.

 

Good points. I'm my case, the toxic influencer was the MIL. I had no idea just how badly she had her claws into my ex wife until after the divorce. But it was my exs fault alone for allowing it.

[guild11]

Your gf is easily manipulated by others. She may be patronizing her boss but it doesn't smell right.

 

Keep your eyes and ears open. Once she moves long distance relationships usually falter anyway. You're young these things happen even though right now it may seem like it's the end of the world. It isn't. Usually when things don't work out its because they shouldn't.

 

 

I'd be looking for another position if I were you. Your gf's boss is toxic.

 

Yes she is toxic but I don't have the option to look for another position.

It's kinda upsets me that my GF let's her talk like this but in the same time I'm worried how her talks with my boss end ined like in the 1st place

[standtall]

Dude..that is damage control by her. She is looking for an exit. Wake up!

[Radarsat]

Buddy, I don't necessarily blame you or are judging you for looking at her messages. She clearly is confused and said some things that obviously would hurt you. However, having done this myself (and I'm ashamed of it), when a relationship gets to the point where you are essentially snooping her phone/email/whatever....then the relationship is in trouble! I honestly would move on. Easier said than done, but trust issues are clearly there with you two. I wish you all the best.

[The_Onceler]

I have snooped twice, and while I am not proud of it, I think I was justified.

 

First time: She and I were living together, sharing everything, including a computer. I logged on early one morning before work, and she had left her email account open. Right there, at the top of her inbox, was a new message with a subject like that read (more or less), "Hey, how are you? Are you still interested in getting together just to f_ck?"

 

Sure, it might have been some sort of pron spam, but it wasn't, and I couldn't help but follow the thread, once found.

 

 

Second time: She announces out of the blue that she wants to split up (we have been together for 8 years, with two young children). I ask, why? And are you seeing another man? She says, no, no other man - she's just not happy. I puzzle over why she suddenly wants out. Over the course of a few days, I notice a new name popping up in her social media - a name I do not know. I finally pick up her phone and look, and there are messages between them on her phone (sexting, photos). After two minutes looking at her messages, she walks in, and I ask, "So, I thought you weren't seeing somebody new? Who is this guy?"

 

She fessed up then, but insisted, it was only sexting and pictures - she wasn't actually "seeing" him (yet), so she hadn't lied to me.

[ChickiePops]

How are you planning to make the relationship work if she's in a different city and you can't move with her?

 

Also..is it possible that your boss has a thing for you?