ChickiePops Posted October 8, 2016 Share Posted October 8, 2016 So if you ever, oh I don't know, get cancer and are on medication that gives you erectile dysfunction..you would be ok with your girlfriend sneaking around behind your back and sleeping with multiple other men? AND you'd be ok with other people knowing about it and not telling you? 4 Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted October 8, 2016 Share Posted October 8, 2016 She has a mental illness and a drug addiction, but you are the one who is really hard done by... right? If the tables were turned and she was to "scratch an itch" with other men, you would probably be on this site complaining about your cheating girlfriend. Seriously, this girl has more than enough problems. Try to get her some help if you can and then leave her alone... The last thing she needs right now is to be in an unhealthy, dysfunctional relationship. I think it's fair to say that your story and your attitude toward sex with this vulnerable woman is really very disturbing to everyone who has been reading this discussion. Link to post Share on other sites
merrmeade Posted October 8, 2016 Share Posted October 8, 2016 Actually, I practiced polyamory for almost 3 years. Yes it is possible, but it is unethical to engage partners under those parameters unless everyone knows that is the way things worked. This was more of an emergency stopgap until the medical fixes and drinking behavior was fixed. polyamory seems to have a definition (multiple consensual relationships) and there's the current practice of polyamory which is sort of assemble your own version. So what did yours consist of? And were the medicine and drinking problems fixed? Link to post Share on other sites
ChickiePops Posted October 8, 2016 Share Posted October 8, 2016 I wasnt saying you were snarky. Please reread my comment. Actually, I practiced polyamory for almost 3 years. Yes it is possible, but it is unethical to engage partners under those parameters unless everyone knows that is the way things worked. This was more of an emergency stopgap until the medical fixes and drinking behavior was fixed. Sex is not an emergency. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author ktya Posted October 8, 2016 Author Share Posted October 8, 2016 (edited) polyamory seems to have a definition (multiple consensual relationships) and there's the current practice of polyamory which is sort of assemble your own version. So what did yours consist of? And were the medicine and drinking problems fixed? I was previously polyamorous. I gave up the lifestyle for this girl. Hence the cool ex girlfriends who were ready to help me out while I tried to help this girl through the sexual dysfunction here and there without expecting anything more. The medication problem was at least temporarily fixed when she moved back in with her parents. Her parents are quite hard a** about her drinking so at least while she was there that was fixed, but now that she's living on her own I have no clue where she's at. I'm going to ignore the peanut gallery. Mermeade your comments seem genuine. Edited October 8, 2016 by ktya addition Link to post Share on other sites
merrmeade Posted October 8, 2016 Share Posted October 8, 2016 I was previously polyamorous. I gave up the lifestyle for this girl. Hence the cool ex girlfriends who were ready to help me out while I tried to help this girl through the sexual dysfunction here and there without expecting anything more. The medication problem was at least temporarily fixed when she moved back in with her parents. Her parents are quite hard a** about her drinking so at least while she was there that was fixed, but now that she's living on her own I have no clue where she's at. I'm going to ignore the peanut gallery. Mermeade your comments seem genuine. if you're going to give me credit, let it be for identifying and articulating how all the strange (to me) elements of your story fit together. It was a lot of trouble and frankly I did it only to expose and make credible the possible reasoning behind such a bizarre world view. I'm not sure how it helps anyone, and I really can't imagine how you could be pleased with the portrait I created. What you did is either more twisted and dark than anything I've ever read in this forum or it's more successful than most tall tales at stringing along a lot of people for a long time - from your perverted efforts to have a relationship with a non-person to your claims of super machismo hormone power to your justifications for infidelity. If that's genuine for you then either you're further gone than was apparent or you're happy your ruse pulled someone in. Either way I failed and that's genuine. Loveshack does work if that's what you were questioning, particularly the Infidelity section because it forces people to face the discordance in their own realities. I've never read anyone as self-satisfied with his own warped views and unwilling to review his perspective as you. Also genuine. If you mean able to discuss without offense, yes, I can and did but what did it accomplish? You haven't changed and aren't interested in changing. I'm not interested in being genuine any more. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
merrmeade Posted October 8, 2016 Share Posted October 8, 2016 Ok sorry, ktya. That upset me - dismissing every single poster as the peanut gallery. You've gotten many thoughtful, deeply felt responses here as clear and genuine as mine. If you still want to talk I'm here and will try to restrain myself. You can have helpful conversations with people that don't agree with you. You deserve the same respect as anyone. You are also genuine in your strange thinking. Maybe you're surrounded by like-minded people and can't recognize when your lifestyle stops working and starts destroying people as did, I believe, your recent participation in the tragedy of your girlfriend. I hope you realize that was the story that reached people, not your petty roommate issues or even your descent into the weirdest infidelity mindf-k I've ever read. I hope that you find someone to whom you want to commit all your strength and caring, someone who will make you want to be a better man every single day and with whom you discover that mature love sex beats any other. You deserve a good life that makes you feel joy and fullness as well as pride in your choices, but you have to learn how to do that. Your efforts to stay accountable to the little girl that called you "daddy" touched me and made me wish you could gather the parts of your best self together and live a life that brings you deep happiness, not just fleeting glimpses. Enough. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
William Posted October 8, 2016 Share Posted October 8, 2016 (edited) After some review and seeing the direction this thread has taken, It will remain closed. ~T Edited October 8, 2016 by William 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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