Should I do something?

[LittleMissMe519]

This is a long post sorry! My husband and I have been married for 2 years coming up and this is what's happened/ happening and I need advice please!! So our daughter was born 5 months ago and I'm regretting a decision I made to stay and not confront my husband about my suspicions of him cheating. When I was about 6 months pregnant I had to go on complete bed reset no sex nothing and I thought he understood it only until one night when he was sleeping and his cell phone kept of going off that I checked it because I thought it might be something important... it was a "erotic massage" person and he as asking her services and if she did blow jobs and so on... so curiously I checked his emails only to find emails to people in the town over from us. This is not the first time I have thought he wasn't faithful when we moved from a house I was going through a notebook and found a "love letter" to a girl from his home city that had obviously been written recently as I just bought the notebook. Now he wants to move back to his home town which is in the other side of the country as where we are right now with my family and I'm concerned that he will cheat on me and that he won't be around. I don't know if I should bring up what I know I am honestly regretting not leaving him right then and there. I don't know what to do.

[MJJean]

So, your husband has long been suspected of being a serial cheater, has engaged the services of what are in all reality prostitutes (erotic massage = sexual contact for money= prostitute), you have turned a blind eye until now, but suddenly care because he wants to move you all far from your support system and closer to a woman wrote a love letter to?

 

Yeah, no.

 

Stay put. The next time, and there will be one, you don't want to be away from your support network with a baby.

Edited October 8, 2016 by MJJean

[Lowrider93]

If your husband is cheating after less than two years of marriage where do you think things will go in the future, I'm thinking it's only gonna get worse.

 

What is his response to all that has happened?

 

The longer you are in this relationship the deeper the damage will be, is this what you really want?

 

Take care

[NTV]

You just found out and I know how shocking it can be. My recommendation is that you watch yourself closely for signs of depression. Combine this with the possibility of postpartum is like a molotov cocktail. See a Dr if you are having any destructive thoughts. Your kids needs at least one responsible adult. Be very aware of this.

 

Second I recommend you use any nervous energy or anxiety or sleeplessness to journal. That's what I did. Planned like a mad scientist. Planned for divorce. Planned for reconciliation. Planned for anything and everything in between. Made backup plans for my backup plans. It might sound over the top but **** I wasn't being very productive otherwise. And it was a lot easier to face the hard truths of what my wife had done when I had plans in place to make happen what I wanted to make happen. And plans for every way the one I wanted could fail.

[Mr. Lucky]

I don't know if I should bring up what I know I am honestly regretting not leaving him right then and there. I don't know what to do.

 

Isn't the altenative to not bringing it up moving with a serial cheater cross country and away from your family?

 

Doesn't sound doable...

 

Mr. Lucky

[Cloudcuckoo]

2 years and a baby and he can't keep it in his pants??

 

You caught a rotten fish darling....put it back in the pond and be careful what kind you catch next...

 

Stay where you are with family who can support you and your little one.

 

wishing you and your little one happier times.

 

Cuckoo

[Lion Heart]

Whatever you do, do NOT move to the other side of the country. Stay near your family.

 

This guy's in his way out.

 

Now you know that he's a serial cheat, think of all the ways you can get your ducks in a row.

 

TAKE HEART your life after this thing has left your life WILL BE WAAAAAAAAAAAAAY better than living with all his revolting behaviours.

 

It was the saddest thing to leave my WH with my 9 month old baby girl BUT I'M SO GRATEFUL to myself that I did.

 

The ONE thing that made my decision instant was knowing that my D would grow up with his modelling and heaven forbid marry a man like her father.

 

I left the morning after D Day.

 

We went to MC for near 2y after that. Stayed living separately 1h apart. I had to end it. He was too Wayward.

 

His next W has lived with him as a serial cheater for 20y and their 2 sons are very messy, I'm sad to say. Our D is AWESOME, she's studying psychology and really has her sh** together! Both myself and my D would've had a horrible life with him.

 

Take as many precautions as you can if you stay. I'd refuse to have sex with him for fear of STDs at least.

But if you do, make him wear a condom PLEASE.

 

STDs can be transferred to you orally too. BE CAREFUL.

 

Just prepare yourself AS WELL AS YOU CAN for separation. Be prepared for all sorts of hellfire. IME these men never leave easily.

 

You'll be OKAY! Your daughter will be AWESOME! Rally some support from trusted people IRL. We'll always be here.

 

Many blessings

Lion Heart

[Friskyone4u]

You stay right where you are. You will get through this and find a better man.

 

Get yourself to an attorney ( without telling him) and find out your rights.

 

He is a serial cheater and you two should still be honeymoon phase at 2 years out.

 

Listen to the folks here. Do not give up whatever support system you have where you are

[aileD]

Doesn't matter where in the country you live.

 

A cheater is a cheater. If he's gonna cheat (again), he will.

 

Don't kick yourself for your decision to stay. You were pregnant....its difficult and scary to think about doing that alone.

 

But now you see clearly. Don't move, or move to where your family is.

 

You need to have a heart to heart with H.

 

Good luck