Heart..PLS STAHP Posted October 9, 2016 Share Posted October 9, 2016 Hey guys please help me to decide. I am invited to a bday of a close friend that was a part of our company when I was still with my ex. He has a bday next friday and he doesnt want to invite anyone as he doesnt wish to spend money on parties. His sister invited the whole company to surprise him and take him out to a restaurant to catch up and hang out prior him leaving for Madrid too. I was ok with going because i checked who is invited and i didnt see my ex's name in the group yet today her name popped up on my phone as notification that she replied in the group chat she is coming too. Im conflicted if i should go or not now but he is a real close friend. Furthermore i dont wish to hurt myself and i know for sure im not completely over her. Can you help me out with an advice??? Link to post Share on other sites
DarrenB Posted October 9, 2016 Share Posted October 9, 2016 I say go mate. No reason why a person of the past should interfere with you partying and having fun with your own friends and acquaintances. Of course, if you still have feelings towards her (which are extremely evident, not just a minor percentage), then I would suggest you do not go. You have no clue what any of you would be like when you're under the influence of alcohol (if it's that type of event). This decision is completely on you here buddy, nothing we say can really help you with that decision, as you know your ex and you know your friend. We do not. But like I stated the above, if you're not completely over her, it probably isn't the most wisest idea... however you shouldn't let this stop you seeing him either. You are not obliged not to go because she is going, right? if necessary, you can even attempt to get other friends to keep you away from her the entire night. At-least then you'll be able to resist any urge or temptation to see or contact her. The decision you make should be based fundamentally on how your r/s with her ended, and the feelings you currently have towards her. But anyhoo, personally I wouldn't let it get to me. Hey of course maybe seeing her might trigger memories and feelings but I'd rather go out and have a good time in the presence of my ex and think about her as minimal as possible and be with friends, rather than think about my ex and what she's doing whilst there without me. Hope you partially understand where i'm trying to get at here. Have a good time regardless! Link to post Share on other sites
RyanO1991 Posted October 9, 2016 Share Posted October 9, 2016 I agree with Darren that if you think you can have fun and show you're not bothered, then go for it. If you think it will hurt and will hinder your recovery, I wouldn't go. If you don't end up going, my advice would be to do something fun or hang out with some other friends or family. Depends on how you feel. Whatever choice you make, hope it works out. Link to post Share on other sites
NopeNah Posted October 9, 2016 Share Posted October 9, 2016 Kind of like a recovering alcoholic who gets invited to the bar after work. Some are ready to sit and enjoy a club soda, while some would still order a whiskey.. Which one are you? Link to post Share on other sites
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