committed co worker giving me mixed signals

[Lazydaze]

Let's start off that I myself a female is married while my co worker Male is not married but in a committed relationship. This is such a odd way of describing what I don't know what's there or not for instance me and male co worker have been working together for a year and we hit it off first day and ever since we've been back and forth with these flirty and touchy episodes they come and go. I personally don't know if he's just being super friendly or he feels something for me. He's the one who started off by grabbing my arm, pinching my waist from behind out of no where. He's super nice and we've never had a bad day while working together. But he gives me mix signals we don't speak outside of work unless it's on Fb nothing more outside of work. But at work it's a on going mind f***. I always catch him smiling at me out of no where and staring at me for a log. Period of time. He teases me about everything. He does talking about his gf to me and how they have arguments and what not. It's not like he doesn't talk about her because he does. But am I overthinking this? Maybe he's just super friendly like that. I'm the only female at work so I can't say I see him do this with other girls. We don't text or talk on the phone it's strictly work non sense and I feel it's making me want him even more because how he is with me. :someone help!!!!

[Lillyp32]

Let's start off that I myself a female is married while my co worker Male is not married but in a committed relationship. This is such a odd way of describing what I don't know what's there or not for instance me and male co worker have been working together for a year and we hit it off first day and ever since we've been back and forth with these flirty and touchy episodes they come and go. I personally don't know if he's just being super friendly or he feels something for me. He's the one who started off by grabbing my arm, pinching my waist from behind out of no where. He's super nice and we've never had a bad day while working together. But he gives me mix signals we don't speak outside of work unless it's on Fb nothing more outside of work. But at work it's a on going mind f***. I always catch him smiling at me out of no where and staring at me for a log. Period of time. He teases me about everything. He does talking about his gf to me and how they have arguments and what not. It's not like he doesn't talk about her because he does. But am I overthinking this? Maybe he's just super friendly like that. I'm the only female at work so I can't say I see him do this with other girls. We don't text or talk on the phone it's strictly work non sense and I feel it's making me want him even more because how he is with me. :someone help!!!!

 

Who cares how he feels about you. Save yourself, your H, this guy and his girlfriend from all of the drama and pain taking this any further could cause.

 

Don't walk but RUN away from this man.

[JewelD]

You're married. You are married. You have a husband. Who cares what this man thinks of you? At best you'll be a quick office lay on the copy machine. Doesn't seem like you give two craps about your husband's feelings.

[Lazydaze]

Who cares how he feels about you. Save yourself, your H, this guy and his girlfriend from all of the drama and pain taking this any further could cause.

 

Don't walk but RUN away from this man.

 

I've been wanting to so bad. My husband and I are going through a divorce (his decision) and I think I'm just dragged into something that's not even there perhaps

[Lillyp32]

I've been wanting to so bad. My husband and I are going through a divorce (his decision) and I think I'm just dragged into something that's not even there perhaps

 

It sounds like you're in a vulnerable place right now. I can promise you that getting involved with a man who is committed to someone else will do you no good. Take time to process your divorce and to heal from it. Then when you're ready, date a man that is SINGLE and is able to give you all of him. Not just pieces of him. It'll save you from loads of pain.

 

Good luck and stay strong!

[whichwayisup]

Let's start off that I myself a female is married while my co worker Male is not married but in a committed relationship. This is such a odd way of describing what I don't know what's there or not for instance me and male co worker have been working together for a year and we hit it off first day and ever since we've been back and forth with these flirty and touchy episodes they come and go.

 

Yet, you as a married woman, are allowing him to flirt and touch you. Maybe ask yourself why you're allowing this, you've got a ring on your finger and he's in a relationship. This is an ego feed, for both of you. And it's dangerous.

 

What do you think your husband would do if he knew what you were doing? Ask yourself how you would feel if your husband was touching and flirting with a woman at work? You can stop it at any time, set boundaries and stick to them. Your personal and professional reputation is at risk.

 

 

I personally don't know if he's just being super friendly or he feels something for me. He's the one who started off by grabbing my arm, pinching my waist from behind out of no where. He's super nice and we've never had a bad day while working together. But he gives me mix signals we don't speak outside of work unless it's on Fb nothing more outside of work. But at work it's a on going mind f***. I always catch him smiling at me out of no where and staring at me for a log. Period of time. He teases me about everything. He does talking about his gf to me and how they have arguments and what not. It's not like he doesn't talk about her because he does. But am I overthinking this? Maybe he's just super friendly like that. I'm the only female at work so I can't say I see him do this with other girls. We don't text or talk on the phone it's strictly work non sense and I feel it's making me want him even more because how he is with me. :someone help!!!!

 

Instead of focusing on why he is doing this, focus on why you're doing this. Other than ego, what's the point of your flirtation? Are you looking for an affair?

[Sharona21]

Hi. Please don't let yourself be dragged into this. I am a MW who had similar interactions with a MM.

I think that MM or those in committed relationships do not get to be super friendly with women unless they have a different motive in mind. The MM I knew did the same thing, in saying that he and his wife argue and fight a lot. I'm not sure if they want you to feel bad for them and then give into some physical affection or not.

Not only is he being disrespectful to his SO, but also to you, and if you continue to play the game, the boundaries will become blurred quickly.

 

It's best to stop it now, before you become emotionally attached to this guy.

Best of luck to to you!

[Logan787]

You're attracted to him because you want to be wanted. You said it was your husbands choice to divorce you, therefore you feel rejected. Having this man and loving the attention he shows you is your way of validating yourself and feeling wanted again.

 

I assure you, if you play the hanky pinky game with him, you will be sorely disappointed. All you will be is a side lay and nothing more. You will feel even more rejected, which in turn will deepen your depression. This is a subconscious setup.

[grassisorisntgreener]

Run. Fast.

 

I was in this same situation. I was more the initiator..

 

Almost 5 years later, I am separated for a year, we had a D-Day, and I'm the single one picking up the pieces of my life and my kids lives and he is still with his girlfriend... they have no children, no bills together.. it's a very odd relationship, but he stays there.