august14 Posted October 18, 2016 Share Posted October 18, 2016 ...I don't really want to be in a committed relationship right now, and I feel that what he wants is a girlfriend. He's really cute. Will it be "leading him on" to ask for his phone number or social media accounts or to ask him to hang out? How should I make it clear I don't want a boyfriend without sounding too presumptuous? Link to post Share on other sites
Gloria25 Posted October 18, 2016 Share Posted October 18, 2016 Nah, relax... Asking/giving a number, meeting, having a coffee/dinner doesn't mean you're proposing marriage...it means you're trying to get to know dude/gal and eventually the "talk" will happen - where you lay out what you're looking for. Just don't wait three months to have the "talk" Besides, until you chat him up - you have no idea that he might be looking for the same thing and/or might be cool with it. Link to post Share on other sites
HillValley Posted October 18, 2016 Share Posted October 18, 2016 Why him? You said you don't want a relationship, so I assume you want to be free to see whoever/ whenever. Sowhy drag this particular dude into this? Just find a guy you know is interested in the same thing as you. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
JuneJulySeptember Posted October 18, 2016 Share Posted October 18, 2016 ...I don't really want to be in a committed relationship right now, and I feel that what he wants is a girlfriend. He's really cute. Will it be "leading him on" to ask for his phone number or social media accounts or to ask him to hang out? How should I make it clear I don't want a boyfriend without sounding too presumptuous? So, what do you want? Sex? Are you asking if a guy would have a problem getting hit on by an attractive woman and getting sex with no strings attached. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author august14 Posted October 19, 2016 Author Share Posted October 19, 2016 Besides, until you chat him up - you have no idea that he might be looking for the same thing and/or might be cool with it. I know he was really interested about six months ago and his friends were teasing him about it (they were suddenly friendly to me too), and then he disappeared from the places we usually ran into each other as if he was making an effort to avoid me. Since the beginning I thought he was cute, but at the time I was really into another guy and he also knew it. He recently resurfaced and acted weirdly unfriendly at first, but after a time we picked up where we left off. I guess I see him more as a friend who happens to be an eye candy...? But also I find him risky since he comes with a group of friends who may end up making or breaking my reputation. Link to post Share on other sites
Osmium13 Posted October 19, 2016 Share Posted October 19, 2016 If he's as interested as you think he is, I suspect he'd take any amount of being with you that's available. Link to post Share on other sites
Fishfingersareyummy Posted October 19, 2016 Share Posted October 19, 2016 So, what do you want? Sex? Are you asking if a guy would have a problem getting hit on by an attractive woman and getting sex with no strings attached. You laugh but there are men who aren't interested in casual sex and I am one of these men. If a woman offers me no strings attached sex, I don't care how attractive she is, her proposal is getting rejected and I'll avoid her afterwards. Link to post Share on other sites
JS84 Posted October 19, 2016 Share Posted October 19, 2016 If I was in his shoes, I'd prefer you not waste my time. If I'm interested in someone in a romantic/sexual sense, especially if I make it known, I don't really have any interest in striking up a platonic friendship or platonically hanging out if that's all they happen to be interested in themselves. I have more than enough friends already for that. Now he could feel completely different himself. And I don't think you'd have too much to lose by trying to reach out. Just make it crystal clear where you stand if it seems like he's looking for something more and if you're sure that's your stance. Link to post Share on other sites
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