Author sanne Posted July 11, 2005 Author Share Posted July 11, 2005 how the heck am i being a pushover? i haven't agreed to do anything with her whatsoever, in fact i told her i wasn't going with her to six flags. just because i'm debating s*** in my head doesn't make me a pushoever. the reason why she wanted to get away from me in the first place was because i was stubborn with her, and not a pushover. Link to post Share on other sites
Drivetildriven Posted July 11, 2005 Share Posted July 11, 2005 I made myself way too easy for my woman. She always had my affections and never had to work for them. She got bored, lost that lovin feeling, wanted a challenge and left me. Now here I sit, hoping she'll come back. Lesson learned. I'm worth working for though and the next woman (or her, hopefully) is going to have to work a little harder to turn my head. I'm not saying you are, but don't be cheap. It sounds like you might have the ball in your court, so keep it there. Link to post Share on other sites
westernxer Posted July 11, 2005 Share Posted July 11, 2005 Sanne, whatever happened to no contact? You're playing right into her hands... Link to post Share on other sites
Author sanne Posted July 11, 2005 Author Share Posted July 11, 2005 ok one last question before i put this all to rest.....do her responses indicate that she still has feelings for me, or is she just confused as to why i'm not pining over her? Link to post Share on other sites
westernxer Posted July 11, 2005 Share Posted July 11, 2005 Her responses mean nothing. The fact that you're speculating says enough about your situation. If she did show a change of heart, you'd know beyond the shadow of a doubt, because she'd say so (even though she could by lying then, too). She wants you to miss her, because it makes her feel good. End of story. Link to post Share on other sites
Author sanne Posted July 11, 2005 Author Share Posted July 11, 2005 yea that's completely true, describes her current actions perfectly. my only gripe is why the hell invite me to six flags. Link to post Share on other sites
Author sanne Posted July 11, 2005 Author Share Posted July 11, 2005 ok instead of talking to her i'm just gonna send her the following txt: "Look I know you feel bad about what happened and want to make it up to me, but it's ok I'm over it and I forgive you." Link to post Share on other sites
Drivetildriven Posted July 12, 2005 Share Posted July 12, 2005 Move on and date other people, while maintaining a small hope in the back of your mind that she'll come around. I know for me it made it a little easier to see other girls, thinking there is a chance she'll come back. Maybe in the process I'll meet someone better and forget about her and so will you. Also, no one can say how they're going to think or feel for the rest of their life, or even three months from now. What she's feeling now might now be true later down the road. Just make yourself a better more attractive person, for yourself, for her, and for other girls. Link to post Share on other sites
Drivetildriven Posted July 12, 2005 Share Posted July 12, 2005 Ha! Shi t I posted that to the wrong one. Disregard Link to post Share on other sites
westernxer Posted July 12, 2005 Share Posted July 12, 2005 Originally posted by sanne my only gripe is why the hell invite me to six flags. She wants to give you a hand job on the roller coaster. Link to post Share on other sites
A Fly onThe Wall Posted July 12, 2005 Share Posted July 12, 2005 Originally posted by westernxer She wants to give you a hand job on the roller coaster. They don't call it the Scream Machine for nothing Link to post Share on other sites
Author sanne Posted July 12, 2005 Author Share Posted July 12, 2005 wow well i got home from working out, took my shirt and shorts off as i was getting ready to hop in the shower, and my ex is sitting right there in my room. so i'm all sweaty, and only wearing boxers at this point, so i excuse myself while i put my clothes back on and come back in. she starts saying that she's really sorry for how she's acted and that she just wishes i wasn't so indifferent about things. she said she got mad because it seemed like i got over her really fast and that i didn't even care about her. basically pouring her heart out to me for a good twenty to thirty minutes. i wasn't prepared for this at all, so i just spoke my mind to her instead of trying to act all tough. i told her that i guess i just reached my breaking point and i have been trying to move on ever since. i don't know she just has a way of getting to me i guess so instead of telling her no that i wouldn't go with her to six flags, i said i'd think about it some more and let her know. it's true that i dislike my ex at times, but i'm not about to kick her while she's already down and tell her no to her face. i let her know over the phone or through email that i cannot go in a few days. i know you guys think i may be weak but honestly i felt like this was the best course of action. Link to post Share on other sites
westernxer Posted July 12, 2005 Share Posted July 12, 2005 Originally posted by sanne she said she got mad because it seemed like i got over her really fast... What's wrong with that? Link to post Share on other sites
greenhorn Posted July 12, 2005 Share Posted July 12, 2005 So she has started playing mind games and is screwing your head. I know how girls are so good at playing these games. You would be complaining to her and she will say one word like I dont want to hurt you, I care for you, and there you go all anger melts away and you forget everything only to be hurt again. This is the perfect vicious cycle and I think all the text books should replace their own example of VC by this. Sanne, when once a relationship breaks then there is only one way to do things correctly, i.e with honesty and straight forward response. Why don't you say to her that honestly you don't think that you could be friends with her, she left you and now you are trying to move over her. So there is nothing left in this relationship that should make you to go to Six flags or any other place in the world. Link to post Share on other sites
pippen_2k Posted July 12, 2005 Share Posted July 12, 2005 All this contact from her has gotta be a big blow! You will be thinking about her 24/7 now and probably have hope again...OUCH! Link to post Share on other sites
greenhorn Posted July 12, 2005 Share Posted July 12, 2005 Originally posted by pippen_2k All this contact from her has gotta be a big blow! You will be thinking about her 24/7 now and probably have hope again...OUCH! Exactly !! Link to post Share on other sites
Author sanne Posted July 12, 2005 Author Share Posted July 12, 2005 haha guys, calm down. i already sent her the txt message saying i can't go with her to six flags and it's a good idea that we not see each other anymore because we both need to move on. I sent it pretty early this morning, so she's probably still sleeping at this point. Don't worry, I wasn't going to let her play mind games on me this time. Anyways, my favorite line from last night was definitely this one : "I didn't know I was so disposable." Link to post Share on other sites
greenhorn Posted July 12, 2005 Share Posted July 12, 2005 Originally posted by sanne haha guys, calm down. i already sent her the txt message saying i can't go with her to six flags and it's a good idea that we not see each other anymore because we both need to move on. I sent it pretty early this morning, so she's probably still sleeping at this point. Don't worry, I wasn't going to let her play mind games on me this time. Thumbs up dude !!, you did the right thing. Anyways, my favorite line from last night was definitely this one : "I didn't know I was so disposable." Good line to say You made the "All -LS- dumped farternity" proud. Link to post Share on other sites
J dub Posted July 12, 2005 Share Posted July 12, 2005 Originally posted by greenhorn "All -LS- dumped farternity" I hope that was a misspelling and not intentional Link to post Share on other sites
greenhorn Posted July 12, 2005 Share Posted July 12, 2005 Originally posted by J dub I hope that was a misspelling and not intentional Oops !! a great mistake, thanks J dub for pointing it out. I will write it again Sanne, you have made the " All -LS-Dumped-Fraternity" proud. Link to post Share on other sites
westernxer Posted July 12, 2005 Share Posted July 12, 2005 Let us know when she writes you back, so that you don't do anything silly (like call her). Link to post Share on other sites
Author sanne Posted July 12, 2005 Author Share Posted July 12, 2005 man i really hate when she does this. she just sent me a few txt's saying that she was sorry for even thinking that it would be a good idea, that she was sorry she let her guard down, and it won't ever happen again. she then said she would just ignore this just like everything else that was wrong in her life and everything will be ok. i know she's hurting right now, probably really badly. but i'm not going to feel guilty this time, and she doesn't have any right to try and make me feel guilty. she put herself in this situation, not me. end of story. Link to post Share on other sites
NightsEcho Posted July 12, 2005 Share Posted July 12, 2005 good for you sanne, proud of you man. That was pretty messed up of her. Sometimes I think our SO just don't get it. That there little bit of contact makes us feel better. It is the opposite it makes us feel so much worse. Keep it up Link to post Share on other sites
westernxer Posted July 12, 2005 Share Posted July 12, 2005 It's about time... good for you. Her pain is not your concern... you have to cover your own ass, because she won't do it. Let her hate you... it's better than disrespecting you. Bottom line: you'll respect yourself a lot more this way. No time to get sentimental, not when your heart is hurting. Link to post Share on other sites
greenhorn Posted July 13, 2005 Share Posted July 13, 2005 She is just trying to make you feel guilty, right now she is hurting but what about if you had gone to six flags and got hurt later,would she have devoted a minute for even thinking about you. Don't give someone more than you get, if you do it then you will taken for easy ride. You are doing good ! Link to post Share on other sites
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