reozeno Posted November 6, 2016 Share Posted November 6, 2016 Met a girl recently and things look well, but i feel that she's actually going out with another guy. I mean besides me. Is it normal for a girl do this? Is this a sign that i should move on? I always feel dat girl if interested in you, they won't bother with othrr guys. What do you guys think? Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted November 6, 2016 Share Posted November 6, 2016 Met a girl recently and things look well, but i feel that she's actually going out with another guy. I mean besides me. Is it normal for a girl do this? Is this a sign that i should move on? I always feel dat girl if interested in you, they won't bother with othrr guys. What do you guys think? Nowadays with the online dating phenomenon people meet a lot of random strangers and there is no way to know if those men or women are serious daters or just players so yes one of the way to go around this is to date till someone stands out of the crowd and we offer to date them exclusively. If you have been on a few dates, if you've been dating her at least a month and if you are interested in dating her exclusively then you tell her about it. 7 Link to post Share on other sites
soph-walker Posted November 6, 2016 Share Posted November 6, 2016 Gaeta is spot on. Dating multiple guys can be a way to quickly 'sift' through a lot of people to find out who you might want to date on a one to one basis. That being said, if a person is multiple dating and sleeping around I would say they might not be looking for someone serious, just playing the field instead, so keep that in mind 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Philosopher Posted November 6, 2016 Share Posted November 6, 2016 From what I have been reading, yes it is pretty normal, though not all girls will do it. I have myself suspected on a couple of occasions that the girl I was dating was also dating someone else. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Arieswoman Posted November 6, 2016 Share Posted November 6, 2016 OP, When I was divorced and dating then, yes, I was dating several guys at the same time. But the emphasis was on dating, not sleeping with them or "making out" etc. With most of them it fizzled out after a few dates so no harm done. If any guy had showed an interest beyond a couple of dates then that would have been a different story. If you are interested in this girl then ask her to be exclusive and see what she says. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
TheTraveler Posted November 6, 2016 Share Posted November 6, 2016 It's no different than a guy going out with multiple girls. If you're single, you can date one at a time or as many as you like. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Gr8fuln2020 Posted November 6, 2016 Share Posted November 6, 2016 Common, I don't know how to qualitatively answer that, but it certainly happens. I think the ladies are much less likely to do so and w/o being sexually involved. Men, on the other hand, well, that's another story....:p I mean, if you have an opportunity to 'meet' 1 or 2 others to get a feel, why not, right? It's just a meet up. But, if you're sharing saliva and other bodily fluids.......EEEWWW. Also, I have found that the ladies are more upfront and honest about multi-dating. My own experience, anyway. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted November 6, 2016 Share Posted November 6, 2016 If you have been on a few dates, if you've been dating her at least a month and if you are interested in dating her exclusively then you tell her about it. i would say six months Link to post Share on other sites
victoria88 Posted November 6, 2016 Share Posted November 6, 2016 1) "Is it normal for a girl do this?" I would say it is NOT normal(to date many men). I think this way because I would not do it. Let me explain that I only mean a love date (in private, a dinner at a restaurant). There is nothing bad in let's say having lunch with colleagues and/or friends. I am mentioning this because some men are so jealous that when they see a girl having lunch with colleagues, they start to think she is interested in these colleagues. (this is a wrong interpretation of the situation) 2) "Is this a sign that i should move on" This is a matter of personal choice (and of moral values). If you are OK with this, stay. If not, leave. Link to post Share on other sites
Methodical Posted November 6, 2016 Share Posted November 6, 2016 I see no reason for her to not date multiple ppl since she is single. Maybe she isn't looking for a monogamous relationship, or perhaps she has reason to not put all her eggs in one basket. Many ppl aren't compatible, so why limit options to one person at a time? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
victoria88 Posted November 6, 2016 Share Posted November 6, 2016 Yes, many people aren't compatible. This is why a man/woman goes on dates (with one person). If they are not compatible they will not have a relationship. Then the man or woman will go out with someone else (one person again). This time he/she may find someone compatible. And the dates will end with a relationship... If a woman goes out with a few guys (for example 4) and if she wants to have a relationship with 3 out of 4? This is not normal to happen all in one time (3 relationships in the same time, 3 men to be intimate with). Well, this is just my opinion. p.s. One thing must be perfectly clear: the man/woman who goes out with many women/men must be honest with everyone of them. No lies, no hiding. Link to post Share on other sites
Alamo657 Posted November 6, 2016 Share Posted November 6, 2016 Met a girl recently and things look well, but i feel that she's actually going out with another guy. I mean besides me. Is it normal for a girl do this? Is this a sign that i should move on? I always feel dat girl if interested in you, they won't bother with othrr guys. What do you guys think? Is it normal ? depends on your own values. Is it common ? it is. Is it acceptable ? Not unless you only want to bang her and nothing else. As you said, if a girl is into you, she won't multi-date. Link to post Share on other sites
Ruby Slippers Posted November 6, 2016 Share Posted November 6, 2016 But the emphasis was on dating, not sleeping with them or "making out" etc. Important distinction. Most people aren't going to have any interest in dating someone who's getting physical with other people. And then there are plenty of people like me, who don't multi-date period. It doesn't take more than a date or two to figure out if you click with someone romantically. I've always dated one man at a time. I tried dating two men at the same time once, and it felt all wrong for me. The men I click with best have expressed the same. Personally, I wouldn't consider dating someone who's dating others, period. Totally different mentality from my own. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
introverted1 Posted November 6, 2016 Share Posted November 6, 2016 OP, are you multi-dating? Does the girl you're interested in know the answer to that question? IOW, is it possible she's dating others because she thinks you are, too? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted November 6, 2016 Share Posted November 6, 2016 How is a young woman to know who she wants if she doesn't date more than one man? Is it normal for men to date multiple women when they are single? Link to post Share on other sites
leogirl876 Posted November 6, 2016 Share Posted November 6, 2016 OP, are you multi-dating? Does the girl you're interested in know the answer to that question? IOW, is it possible she's dating others because she thinks you are, too? Bingo right there!!! I'm not a multi-dater in that, I'll go out with a couple different guys on 1-2 dates to see if there's chemistry and compatibiliity, but I won't continue going out with them if I don't think it's going to go anywhere. Now if there was someone I liked more than the others, but I wasn't sure if he was still seeing other people, I would maybe be willing to flirt or go out on a date here and there until I knew where he stood. I know the mature thing to do is to ask the person, but it's hard because it makes you look needy and I hate that. Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted November 6, 2016 Share Posted November 6, 2016 There are some women that muti date to see which one is willing to step up and ask for exclusivity. So if you like this girl, show it, tell her, let her know you have no interest in dating others and want to focus on her. See where that takes you. Best of luck 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Gr8fuln2020 Posted November 7, 2016 Share Posted November 7, 2016 There are some women that muti date to see which one is willing to step up and ask for exclusivity. So if you like this girl, show it, tell her, let her know you have no interest in dating others and want to focus on her. See where that takes you. Best of luck Yes, I believe this is so. Link to post Share on other sites
Author reozeno Posted November 7, 2016 Author Share Posted November 7, 2016 OP, are you multi-dating? Does the girl you're interested in know the answer to that question? IOW, is it possible she's dating others because she thinks you are, too? Im not multi-dating but i do make it hidden. Like once i gone out watching movies, she asked is it with a girl? i just change topic. But later i do shows my answer by posting a photo me and my family watching movies on my social media and she did respond to the photo with a like. It's not that i love doing it but i never felt the need to reveal it. Because i ask her out, it shows my interest. Plain and simple. Plus, i want the chase happen on both party, not just me doing all thework . Link to post Share on other sites
Author reozeno Posted November 7, 2016 Author Share Posted November 7, 2016 Thank you guys for most answer. i love it. But, now i forgot to mention, she post on social media about going out which seriously shown like a date. This is why i asked this question. Its publicized on her social media but no men photo, name etc mentioned. Im seriously don't feel like chasing her any longer due to her act. but what do you guys think? Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted November 7, 2016 Share Posted November 7, 2016 You are just assuming out of insecurity. If you had any confidence you wouldn't let this bother you in the least. Link to post Share on other sites
JoeSmith357-1 Posted November 7, 2016 Share Posted November 7, 2016 She's making it easy for you to figure out that she's not a person you want to date. And if this is the new "normal", no thanks. And using "guys do it" as an excuse is complete BS. The guys who do it all get panned for being "players", but it's ok for women? Please... I don't do it and would expect any potential partner to not Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted November 7, 2016 Share Posted November 7, 2016 Thank you guys for most answer. i love it. But, now i forgot to mention, she post on social media about going out which seriously shown like a date. This is why i asked this question. Its publicized on her social media but no men photo, name etc mentioned. Im seriously don't feel like chasing her any longer due to her act. but what do you guys think? No leave her alone because this clearly bothers you. Look for a girl who only wants to date you. Link to post Share on other sites
No_Go Posted November 7, 2016 Share Posted November 7, 2016 Depends. How many dates have you had with her? Were you intimate? If you had sex or if you've been on more than 5-6 dates, I think it is unacceptable for her to multi-date. Otherwise it is ok. Met a girl recently and things look well, but i feel that she's actually going out with another guy. I mean besides me. Is it normal for a girl do this? Is this a sign that i should move on? I always feel dat girl if interested in you, they won't bother with othrr guys. What do you guys think? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Popsicle Posted November 7, 2016 Share Posted November 7, 2016 I don't multi-date, it's too stressful for me and I think it's disrespectful, but some women and men do and have a different philosophy. Once I find out that they are multi-dating beyond the first two weeks of us dating, I'm out of there. Hell, I don't even like guys who have female BFF's. Tell her what you want and expect with her. If she puts up a fight, tell her it's not working out for you, and move on. Those other suitors will always be there. One at a time. Link to post Share on other sites
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