ECarlson Posted November 7, 2016 Share Posted November 7, 2016 Does anyone know any good messages that can be copy and pasted and sent to any profiles? A couple of reasons I ask 1. I've been on OkCupid for 3 years now. Crafting personalized messages for different profiles have yeilded absolutely no results. I've sent out so many of these messages over the years, and hardly ever get replies. I feel angry because I feel like reading through profiles and sending nice messages only to get nothing in return is a complete waste of my time. If I'm going to get nothing for my efforts, then I should at least be putting in no effort in the first place. 2. I'm just horrible at starting conversations in the first place. I have trouble making these personalized messages, and I feel all of the ones I've sent weren't good enough to illicit a response from anyone. So I ask, what's a good message that can be sent to anyone but still generate a response? Link to post Share on other sites
Blackened Heart Posted November 7, 2016 Share Posted November 7, 2016 I doubt any copy/paste message would yield you any different results. I would bet my money it has more to do with your profile and what you have on it. Whether it be your bio, the pictures you use, or preferences, that is likely what is causing such low responses. Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted November 7, 2016 Share Posted November 7, 2016 Don't do that. We know it's a copy and paste and we hate it. Just send us a hello how are you - and it's sufficient. If we like your profile we will reply. There is no magic words or sentence that will convince us to reply to you. We have to like your profile. Link to post Share on other sites
Toodaloo Posted November 7, 2016 Share Posted November 7, 2016 If you are putting the effort in and you are getting nothing back its time to change things up. Try PoF instead and get rid of your OK Cupid account. Change your photos and write up. OK Cupid in my area was full of guys just wanting to get laid or text me pictures of their penis'... I hear in other areas its loads better so it could be simply demographics. Also don't rely on OLD alone. Get out and join a class or something and talk to people... Link to post Share on other sites
Author ECarlson Posted November 7, 2016 Author Share Posted November 7, 2016 I doubt any copy/paste message would yield you any different results. I would bet my money it has more to do with your profile and what you have on it. Whether it be your bio, the pictures you use, or preferences, that is likely what is causing such low responses. That's the problem, I'm not even getting profile views from the people I message. Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted November 8, 2016 Share Posted November 8, 2016 Don't get too distracted by the technical aspects of dating sites. Profile views, wants to meet, deleted-unread etc are all just meaningless in the end. All that matters is responses. If you're not getting responses then the problem is always that your profile and/or photos suck. Message content is really simple and changing that won't help you if your profile blows chunks. There is no magic message that will overcome a bad profile. I'd recommend you go to the profile reviews forum of your chosen OLD site and ask for a profile review. Nice people will help you out there. We're not allowed to post personally-identifying information on this forum which is why I recommend going to the forums of your OLD site and asking there. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
LookAtThisPOst Posted November 8, 2016 Share Posted November 8, 2016 Don't get too distracted by the technical aspects of dating sites. Profile views, wants to meet, deleted-unread etc are all just meaningless in the end. All that matters is responses. If you're not getting responses then the problem is always that your profile and/or photos suck. Message content is really simple and changing that won't help you if your profile blows chunks. There is no magic message that will overcome a bad profile. I'd recommend you go to the profile reviews forum of your chosen OLD site and ask for a profile review. Nice people will help you out there. We're not allowed to post personally-identifying information on this forum which is why I recommend going to the forums of your OLD site and asking there. I don't get the whole "photos" sucking part, I mean....I guess if the pictures are shadowy or grainy or basically, you can't see the person too well (sunglasses) ...is that what you mean by "suck"? But if they are clear photos of the person, from head to toe, waist up, very clear photos...I could not see how they could suck. To be frank, if the person is unattractive or just plain ugly, there's no photo that can turn on the "Wow, he's a hunk!!" switch. lol Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted November 8, 2016 Share Posted November 8, 2016 I don't get the whole "photos" sucking part, I mean....I guess if the pictures are shadowy or grainy or basically, you can't see the person too well (sunglasses) ...is that what you mean by "suck"? Exactly. Not smiling. Wearing hats/shades covering your face. Bad quality, blurry, grainy. Bathroom selfies. Dark/gloomy, poorly lit, silhouette. Did I say NOT SMILING. These are all things that are very, very common in OLD photos. And yet the owners of these profiles still don't understand why they are getting no responses. Duh. Just go read POF profile reviews forum and you will see almost every single person asking for help has terrible photos -- and doesn't understand why they aren't getting any replies. To be frank, if the person is unattractive or just plain ugly, there's no photo that can turn on the "Wow, he's a hunk!!" switch. lol True, but 90% of people are average looking. Good photos get much more success than bad photos of the same person. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
LookAtThisPOst Posted November 8, 2016 Share Posted November 8, 2016 Did I say NOT SMILING Believe it or not, I think OK Cupid had a blog or something regarding that men NOT smiling attracts more women. I say it's absurd, what do you think? I recall posting somewhere else how they post like 7 photos of themselves, and none of them are smiling, all deadpan. I can't believe the excuses they come up with for the RBF. "When I smile, I look psychotic." or they feel they look stupid when they smile, so they don't. Some proclaim themselves "non-smilers" in any photo, as if they are convinced that they make themselves look WORSE by smiling. Thoughts? Link to post Share on other sites
Popsicle Posted November 8, 2016 Share Posted November 8, 2016 Women don't like this. I don't know which is worse, these or the "Hi" with nothing else written messages. If I had to choose which one is worse, I'd choose he copy+paste messages. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted November 8, 2016 Share Posted November 8, 2016 I think OK Cupid had a blog or something regarding that men NOT smiling attracts more women. I say it's absurd, what do you think? I remember seeing that too. I seem to remember it also suggested looking off-centre was better than direct eye contact. I think if you're very good looking then you can get away with that kind of photo, but for the 90% majority of average looking guys, looking friendly is your best bet. And that means a warm, welcoming smile. I've heard every excuse in the book for not having great photos, and frankly my response is always the same, stop making excuses and go get some, or you might as well just give up now. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
SwordofFlame Posted November 8, 2016 Share Posted November 8, 2016 Copy/paste messages do work occasionally. The profiles they tend to work best on are the ones that are very brief and non-informative. I guess it's because there's really nothing to ask about on their profile if they didn't say much. Link to post Share on other sites
Miss Peach Posted November 8, 2016 Share Posted November 8, 2016 Unless someone looks like an amazing match and I am getting slow I just ignore the hi, how are you, and copy/paste messages. I message both sexes. I know it's frustrating from a man's perspective. But to look at it from a woman's perspective, we have so many guys wanting to meet us. Most put in the least amount of effort possible. With that much attention and limited free time, I go for the really good matches and the men who put in time. The other pet peeve of mine are the people who put very little on their profiles and little effort. If I have no idea whether it's worth my time, I tend to just move on. Link to post Share on other sites
JuneJulySeptember Posted November 8, 2016 Share Posted November 8, 2016 (edited) Does anyone know any good messages that can be copy and pasted and sent to any profiles? A couple of reasons I ask 1. I've been on OkCupid for 3 years now. Crafting personalized messages for different profiles have yeilded absolutely no results. I've sent out so many of these messages over the years, and hardly ever get replies. I feel angry because I feel like reading through profiles and sending nice messages only to get nothing in return is a complete waste of my time. If I'm going to get nothing for my efforts, then I should at least be putting in no effort in the first place. 2. I'm just horrible at starting conversations in the first place. I have trouble making these personalized messages, and I feel all of the ones I've sent weren't good enough to illicit a response from anyone. So I ask, what's a good message that can be sent to anyone but still generate a response? In all honesty... If I had spent ZERO effort on OLD in the roughly 14 or 15 months I was on it, aside from setting up the initial profile, I'd have had the same outcome ... a girlfriend. Because she messaged me first, our initial messages were short and BS (there wasn't much for me to write because her profile was super short), and then the first date happened and the rest is history. I had dates with a few other women and I would definitely say they were as responsive as me. In other words, a cut/paste message would have worked, because they were interested in meeting. I do believe there was one situation where I thoroughly looked through a woman's profile, picked out her type of personality, and interests, spent a few hours coming up with a carefully crafted message that showed that I had a unique interest in her ... and she actually responded. But I think that she looked at my profile before. Let it be known that for the many, many other carefully crafted such messages I spent hours upon hours on, I got zero responses. So, rambling aside, I think that's your answer. Put in 'some' carefully crafted messages for the women who look at your profile, and almost zero for the women you message blind. That's how I would play it if I was at it again. Edited November 8, 2016 by JuneJulySeptember 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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