Difference between "Emotion" & "Feeling"

[confusingme]

I'm just very confused by these expressions.

 

What is the difference between "Emotion" and "Feeling" ?

 

What does it mean when a man says "We relate to each other but you should not have emotions." "I like you, I was in love with you. But only in our own world. The worlds cannot be crossed."

 

When you feel related to each other, doesn't it mean you have feelings for each other, and doesn't it mean you should be emotional ?

 

In the beginning, my exMM told me "I'm (Himself) very emotional too, emotion means passion. It's a good thing."

 

While now when the worlds are crossed, I guess emotion means "drama", huh ?

 

He's still talking to me by calling me with faked numbers. He declared that he "Just want to check if I'm doing fine."

[OneLov]

Emotions are conscious or subconscious physical reactions caused by perceived circumstances. For example, you are terrified of "x." So upon seeing "x" your heart rate increases, your palms begin to sweat, and your hunger ceases. You're experiencing the emotion of terror/fear. Once you think or say to yourself, "oh man, I'm scared s***less right now," you are feeling the emotion of terror/fear.

 

Love is not an emotion or feeling. It is a motivator like hunger and works in our brain's reward pathways. Like hunger, it can cause a spectrum of emotions and feelings. It can make you happy, mad, sad, etc.

 

Romantic attachment is an emotion. He's saying dont go feeling all joyous about it because I cannot have a legitimate relationship with you. I don't want to feel "bad" when I break your heart. So this is my highly enigmatic warning that I if my SO ever finds out, I will cut those emotional bonds in a NY minute.

Edited November 11, 2016 by OneLov

[aileD]

I'm not sure if the feeling but all her told you was bull **** to keep you in the affair. If he flat out said "I love you but only in our little world" he's making it clear that you are just a fantasy for him, that will be easily dumped when reality comes into play and the bubble of the affair is burst.

[MidnightBlue1980]

I'm just very confused by these expressions.

 

What is the difference between "Emotion" and "Feeling" ?

 

What does it mean when a man says "We relate to each other but you should not have emotions." "I like you, I was in love with you. But only in our own world. The worlds cannot be crossed."

 

When you feel related to each other, doesn't it mean you have feelings for each other, and doesn't it mean you should be emotional ?

 

In the beginning, my exMM told me "I'm (Himself) very emotional too, emotion means passion. It's a good thing."

 

While now when the worlds are crossed, I guess emotion means "drama", huh ?

 

He's still talking to me by calling me with faked numbers. He declared that he "Just want to check if I'm doing fine."

 

You are reading too much into the specific words. He is telling you he wants to have sex with you but not to have any expectations about love with him. In plain English, he wants you a a booty call.

 

And what is up with the check in thing? xmm still says that. Is there a book out there with these terms?

[Grapesofwrath]

He is telling you that he has you completely compartmentalizes. You exist for him only inside the fantasy world of the affair. Expect nothing more. You are his toy. When he has time to play with you, he will take you off the shelf and play. When play time is over, he puts you back on the shelf and shuts the door. He does not want "drama" from his toy. He wants you to fall in line with this situation and just be his fun toy.

 

You are nobody's toy.

[spiderowl]

He wants to keep you on the side, not to have you cross over into his life. That's what he means. He is talking about relating but keeping it strictly within certain boundaries. He is setting up the boundaries and you have no say in the matter.

 

I think you deserve better. x

[BTDT2012]

I enjoy having you as my sidepiece, don't intrude into my real life.

[confusingme]

I'm not sure if the feeling but all her told you was bull **** to keep you in the affair. If he flat out said "I love you but only in our little world" he's making it clear that you are just a fantasy for him, that will be easily dumped when reality comes into play and the bubble of the affair is burst.

 

Thank you aileD, I think so too.

[confusingme]

Emotions are conscious or subconscious physical reactions caused by perceived circumstances. For example, you are terrified of "x." So upon seeing "x" your heart rate increases, your palms begin to sweat, and your hunger ceases. You're experiencing the emotion of terror/fear. Once you think or say to yourself, "oh man, I'm scared s***less right now," you are feeling the emotion of terror/fear.

 

Love is not an emotion or feeling. It is a motivator like hunger and works in our brain's reward pathways. Like hunger, it can cause a spectrum of emotions and feelings. It can make you happy, mad, sad, etc.

 

Romantic attachment is an emotion. He's saying dont go feeling all joyous about it because I cannot have a legitimate relationship with you. I don't want to feel "bad" when I break your heart. So this is my highly enigmatic warning that I if my SO ever finds out, I will cut those emotional bonds in a NY minute.

 

 

Thank you OneLov, I think I became to understand him more now.

I think what he meant was I was having so much feeling that I finally spoke to my friend about the affair and my friend told his wife everything. Thus his wife found out, etc...

He did like me/or the whole thing, he repeats that he never regrets. Well, probably another whole story when he told his wife...

Anyway, I think it doesn't matter what the words mean.

His actions explained it all.

I'm the toy, he likes, but just a toy.

That's it.

He had to dump the toy now because his mother doesn't like it, it makes too much noise, or looks ugly...whatever...he still likes the toy and still wants to play with the toy but he has to listen to his mama.

 

Nevertheless, time will heal....

[confusingme]

You are reading too much into the specific words. He is telling you he wants to have sex with you but not to have any expectations about love with him. In plain English, he wants you a a booty call.

 

And what is up with the check in thing? xmm still says that. Is there a book out there with these terms?

 

Actually, MidnightBlue, you just remind me something he said one time when I threw a tantrum.

He said "You have a huge expectation which I cannot deliver on."

Another time, he also said "I'm usually not this patient with my wife but since you are not my wife I'm more tolerable." (For goodness's sake, I was happy to hear that, I felt like a victor. Geez!!)

How blind an OW can be ?

[confusingme]

He is telling you that he has you completely compartmentalizes. You exist for him only inside the fantasy world of the affair. Expect nothing more. You are his toy. When he has time to play with you, he will take you off the shelf and play. When play time is over, he puts you back on the shelf and shuts the door. He does not want "drama" from his toy. He wants you to fall in line with this situation and just be his fun toy.

 

You are nobody's toy.

 

Expect nothing more!

You nailed it Grapesofwrath.

Why are we OWs so emotional in the affairs ?

[confusingme]

He wants to keep you on the side, not to have you cross over into his life. That's what he means. He is talking about relating but keeping it strictly within certain boundaries. He is setting up the boundaries and you have no say in the matter.

 

I think you deserve better. x

 

 

I truly think I deserve better as well.

I went to my college this afternoon, school starts in January.

And I haven't done signing up for orientation yet !!! I have to take some test before I can sign up because I'm not a US citizen.

I haven't done it because I have been so into this crap...

 

When I was at school and I got confused by something, so I texted my husband for help. He helped me and I felt a connection with my husband after a long time.

 

I think that's the difference between the affair and family.

NO matter how fantasy the affair is, it can not be brought into real life. You want to live you real life, forget about the beautiful things the OM has said to you, forget about love...

If you go too far, it will tear your body and soul apart.

It will mess up your life. (In my case, forgot to take the test and now in trouble signing up for orientation)

 

Anyway, I don't hate him.

But it's time to ignore all his craps, next time when he calls me, I'll tell him firmly without any emotion "I'm very busy studying for my test."

Instead of "Why?" "I don't understand" "I'm very sad" "I don't know what to do" These words open the door for him, don't they ?

[confusingme]

I enjoy having you as my sidepiece, don't intrude into my real life.

 

Right, no more sidepieces. I'm this person with EMOTIONS, FEELINGS.

and I will not intrude into your real life.

[spiderowl]

Confusingme, you do deserve better and someone better will come along. You just need to remember not to accept less. There is nothing wrong with you, only him. Don't you deserve a guy who is there for you and no-one else?