what is your take on this?

[wiseman6716]

Well. I received a text today around lunch time.

 

Sorry to be bothering you, I'm just having a bad day and saw your card and wanted to say you looked really good on Saturday and I had a lot of fun at the rehearsal dinner and on the party bus.

 

The card was sent over a month ago and that is the first text I got in a month.

 

I really don't know what to think of this?

[ExpatInItaly]

Well. I received a text today around lunch time.

 

Sorry to be bothering you, I'm just having a bad day and saw your card and wanted to say you looked really good on Saturday and I had a lot of fun at the rehearsal dinner and on the party bus.

 

The card was sent over a month ago and that is the first text I got in a month.

 

I really don't know what to think of this?

 

Nothing.

 

Did she still cheat on you? Yes.

Is she still with her affair partner? Yes.

 

She probably had a fight with her boyfriend and is using you for attention. But she will drop again the moment she feels better.

 

Block her already.

[rester]

Well. I received a text today around lunch time.

 

Sorry to be bothering you, I'm just having a bad day and saw your card and wanted to say you looked really good on Saturday and I had a lot of fun at the rehearsal dinner and on the party bus.

 

The card was sent over a month ago and that is the first text I got in a month.

 

I really don't know what to think of this?

 

She's having a bad day and wants to use your attention to make her feel better. Ignore it.

[lovebug_5858]

DO NOT REPLY.

 

No. She cannot use you whenever she feels like this. She chose to discard you from her life, that means you being there for her, consoling, etc.

 

Leave it alone.

[Blanco]

If anything, this should upset you.

 

She cheats on you, leaves you for another man, but still wants you around for emotional support when the waters in her life get a bit choppy? GTFO with that crap.

[Toodaloo]

Well. I received a text today around lunch time.

 

Sorry to be bothering you, I'm just having a bad day and saw your card and wanted to say you looked really good on Saturday and I had a lot of fun at the rehearsal dinner and on the party bus.

 

The card was sent over a month ago and that is the first text I got in a month.

 

I really don't know what to think of this?

 

Wise

 

This is what is happening. She is attention seeking. Its that simple. She rubbed it in your face, she tried everything to get an outburst from you, angry and shouting, pathetic and sniveling, doesn't matter because then she could have hated you. Then she could call you out as a bad person.

 

Instead she saw a guy who has his s*** together despite her putting him through hell. She knows exactly what she has done.

 

She saw a guy who is strong and masculine and still good and kind and fun regardless of whether she is there or not.

 

She saw a guy dealing with his emotions with dignity, grace and that special something that makes us women go weak at the knees.

 

She saw a guy who is capable and independent and yes god damn it SEXY!

 

She saw a guy who is an amazing catch and she knows she has screwed up.

 

So what does she do? She tries to get your attention. She isn't as happy as she has been pretending to be. Its all a mask all the time.

 

All this is too little and way too late.

 

Keep your boundaries up. Truth is even if you start speaking to her and end up getting back together she will just do this to you all over again. Do you really want to go through each wedding, christening, bar mitzvah, funeral, holiday etc feeling the way that you do now? Because if you take this little bread crumb that is what will happen.

 

Time to sack up and stay strong. Do not reply. Keep going with your healing and keep going with looking after yourself.

 

Do not accept this. You are better than this, you deserve better and if you keep your boundaries up and heal you will get better.

[wiseman6716]

Well I texted her back that night.

 

I'm sorry to hear you had a bad day, but thank you for the compliment. Glad you had a good time.

 

 

Just confused.

[lovebug_5858]

What happened with the text exchange?

[wiseman6716]

No further conversation was made.

 

Just un real when she had a hint I was moving on and ok, she sends a text like that, and I'll be honest has got my head thinking again the last few days, about her motive.

[Marc878]

Well I texted her back that night.

 

I'm sorry to hear you had a bad day, but thank you for the compliment. Glad you had a good time.

 

 

Just confused.

 

You can't leave it alone she'll continue to drop breadcrumbs and get ego kibbles watching you gobble them up.

 

Block her or linger in limbo. It's your life to waste if you want.

[S2B]

Why is she allowed any of your head space?

 

She had a bad day - boo Hoo! She needs to grow up! Don't let her think you're her shoulder to cry on when she's had a bad day! She has a boyfriend that can listen to her crap about her day - you know, that guy she was with - sitting in his lap with last week in order to embarrass you in front of others.

 

Tell her to go cry to him!

 

You don't need her crap! Draw the line man! Cut her loose - she still thinks you're HER doormat. You gotta set her straight!

[wiseman6716]

what do suggest I do to let her know this?

[JewelD]

Exactly what everyone has been telling you all of these pages. BLOCK HER. Move on with your life. Stop engaging in convo with people who treat you like crap.

[Marc878]

what do suggest I do to let her know this?

 

You don't let her know anything. Block phone, email, Facebook, etc.

 

It's your best way forward. Yeah, it'll hurt for awhile but you get over her quicker this way.

 

You're coming across as needy, clingy, hanging on. You have value and deserve better. Realize your worth.

 

Your actions say you are worth more than me and I'm waiting for you no matter what you do to me???? Why?

[Toodaloo]

Well I texted her back that night.

 

I'm sorry to hear you had a bad day, but thank you for the compliment. Glad you had a good time.

 

Just confused.

 

Well she got your attention which is what she wanted.

 

Could have been worse though.

 

Next time ignore her. Its just not worth it. Time for you to start thinking about you and looking after yourself.

 

Cut this one out Wise and you will heal faster. She is a mind f*** and it really is that simple. Don't let her do it to you. Just ignore her.

[S2B]

what do suggest I do to let her know this?

 

She will find out when she gets absolutely no response from you.

 

The sooner you block her - the better off you'll be in the long run.

 

What are you waiting for?

[wiseman6716]

Im 31 and my ex 28, been broke up for almost 3 months. Tried getting her back and talked for a week about 1.5 month ago. The problem was she was crushing on a guy and it ruined our relationship. They are still seeing each other. We we were in a wedding at the end of October and afterwards she texted me sorry to bother you, had a bad day but seen a past card you gave me and wanted to say you looked great and had fun at the dinner and party bus (when her new guy was not around).

 

I simply replied, sorry to hear you had a bad day, but thanks for the compliment, glad you had a good time. Mean time a group of is went out and I brought two girls along and a pic was put on social media. Nothing crazy a group shot. So last week, a week after first text, the night before I leave for vacation (we had planned with a group of our friends and my family) she text me have fun in ^^^ Miss you like crazy. I simply did not respond.

 

When arriving to the destination a good friend said a mutual friend of ours told him the rumor was the girls I brought out were fake and either paid for or forced to go. Un real. I laughed it off. I known the one girl for years and the other was her friend. My ex and her new guy used her ticket and went on vacation else where. I truly don't know why my ex doesn't let things be, and Im not sure what to think of all of it. I truly care bout her still for some odd reason, but its hard to believe that she would be that evil to someone after 3 years of being together. Thoughts?

THank you!

Edited November 15, 2016 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[Satu]

Get some no contact cream and rub it in all over.

 

 

*No direct contact.

*No sending or receiving of messages.

*Block any means she might use to contact you.

*No replies to anything that gets through your blocks.

*No indirect contact through third parties.

*De-friend or delete her from all social media.

*No monitoring of her on social media.

*No 'little birds' feeding you news.

*Tell people that you don't want to know anything about what she is doing or saying.

 

 

Take care.

[Mr Scorpio]

I truly care bout her still for some odd reason, but its hard to believe that she would be that evil to someone after 3 years of being together. Thoughts?

 

Have you read some of the threads in the divorce forum? Replace 3 years with 30 my friend. But that isn't to diminish your pain. My thoughts? You're broken up and she's with a new guy. She has moved on. You have moved on. Her breadcrumb-texts are an ego-stroke and/or her trying to keep one foot in the pool. Apox on that!