c_c43224 Posted July 13, 2005 Share Posted July 13, 2005 My best friend thinks that her husband is cheating on her but she doesn't have any solid proof. They have been married for 5 or 6 years and a couple of years ago, she caught him sending e-mails back and forth with a lady that he worked with or knew. They went out to dinner often. Eventually somehow they stopped talking. They have moved away from the area and the husband is starting a buisness. He has been starting this buisness for about 2-3 years now and has a partner in it as well. He is currently going part time with his buisness but is still working part time at his job he used to have full time. He was controlling and agressive in the first few years of marriage and this past year, the wife has realized that he was controlling and what kind of me he was being and has started to stand up for herself. The family has always been 2nd since he started with his new buisness and he proised that the family would never be last and if it ever did he would stop. Whenever he is talked to about it, he blows it off. The wife is to the point where she doesn't care if he spends time with her, she just wants her kids to be able to see him and spend more than 3 mintues a week with him. She has always had suspisions lately that somethings been going on. About 2 weeks ago, she called his cell phone and a lady answered and was all laughing and saying hi and the wife hung up. THinking she had dialed the wrong number she pressed redial and it was his number and it went directly to voice mail. I blocked my number and called his cell phone and it went to voice mail. She called his cell phone and left a message saying i don't know who the girl was and you can kind of imagine the way it went. She called work and got no answer. about 2 minutes after she left the message on his cell phone he calls back and says that he doesn't know what she was talking about and that he was in the bathroom and kept directing all his phone calls to voice mail. He said she must have dailed the wrong number although i went and looked at the redial tomake sure she had done it right as well. Yesterday he had to work for his new buisness and he worked from 4pm and didn't get home till 6am. He called a few times from where he was working at but that was early on. At one time he called and said someone was outside in a suv with loud music playing because the wife could hear loud music from the phone. He came home at 6am this morning and she said do you want some breakfast before you go to bed and he said no, i ate already and she asked where and he said mcdonalds. He has lately been intrested in getting a motorcycle, has started working out and really didn't have much of an intrest before. The wife has checked his computer and has found him looking at several sites where you can get matched up with people as well as web cams, and porn sites. He also has multiple e-mail addressess and she knows passowords on all of them that she knows of but one and can't figure it out. She looked on the computer tonight and he has been looking at realestate in another state for some reason (renting property). They have never talked about getting a summer home or anything at all like that. He comes across to people that he is a loving husband and all that but its all lies. His wife looked in his phone at text messages and was lying about being late to work so many times saying that his kids were sick, his wife was sick, or the wife forgot to turn on the alaram or she turned off the alarm. Recently she has been catching him in little lies about things. The place he worked at last night till 6 am, he was supposed to go back today and then was supposed to go back tonight but didn't for some reason. What do we do? Link to post Share on other sites
LucreziaBorgia Posted July 13, 2005 Share Posted July 13, 2005 Invest in a PI, and get the solid proof to show her what her gut already knows to be true. Link to post Share on other sites
wanting to heal Posted July 14, 2005 Share Posted July 14, 2005 He is cheating. I would get a tracking device for his car. You can get it at Land Air Sea systems. Link to post Share on other sites
Sal Paradise Posted July 14, 2005 Share Posted July 14, 2005 No doubt about it, he is cheating. Link to post Share on other sites
RecordProducer Posted July 19, 2005 Share Posted July 19, 2005 C_C, it sounds like you're the OW trying to figure out whether his wife suspects or not. If I am right, I will tell you this, she may perfectly be fooled by her husband for years and close her eyes to his affair and never leave him. If it's really a friend of yours then she already knows too much, you may stay out of it. Don't tell her to dump the ass cuz it ain't your business. Link to post Share on other sites
loony Posted July 19, 2005 Share Posted July 19, 2005 I think getting a PI is a good idea to prepare herself well for a divorce, this guy seems to be quite self-centered and he might not take it very well if she decides to go her own ways. I'd try to get solid proof whether he was really cheating or not, if he was I would then take a good look at my feelings for him and if I really believed in this marriage, if it was really something worth fighting for. It's counseling or divorce. It's a bit difficult to conclude from your post to her state of mind, but I would bet she's not very happy and she should be careful to ensure a good financial arrangement for her kids because from the description you gave us about her husband I doubt that his family is anywhere on his priority list. Link to post Share on other sites
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