PegNosePete Posted December 6, 2016 Share Posted December 6, 2016 I disagree. My story is very similar (husband doesn't feel much emotion, knew we didn't have a marriage and just let it run its course, I asked for us to work on things and it didn't happen). I did not, however, have any other man. Well there you go, that makes it entirely different. Would you have resented him for asking you to move out, if you actually had been banging some other dude behind his back? Link to post Share on other sites
New_girl Posted December 6, 2016 Share Posted December 6, 2016 She hid her loss of feelings from you for 3 years. Why to people tell themselves this lie? Because it's easy, I guess. If you don't spend time together, or connect emotionally, or have hum drum sex, or no sex, or don't laugh together, or just "play house," why do you think the love will stay alive? She didn't have to "hide" anything. If you neglect your car for 3 years, it probably won't run very well. We don't blame the car! And she did ask him to go to counseling. She told him she wasn't happy. He said so in his original post. Was she wrong to have the EA with another man? Absolutely! Did this guy know exactly how bad his marriage was? Yes. But he played dumb. Again, you wouldn't neglect your car for 3 years. But your marriage, you will and then blame the other person for not telling you? Nope. Just an example of not being able to be honest with yourself. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
New_girl Posted December 6, 2016 Share Posted December 6, 2016 Well there you go, that makes it entirely different. Would you have resented him for asking you to move out, if you actually had been banging some other dude behind his back? Unless I missed it somewhere in his posts, she's not banging anyone. Let's stick to the truth and not sensationalize. Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted December 6, 2016 Share Posted December 6, 2016 Unless I missed it somewhere in his posts, she's not banging anyone. Let's stick to the truth and not sensationalize. She is clearly very heavily involved with another man, she has lied repeatedly about it, set up secret gmail accounts to communicate with him, lied about cutting contact, shown through her actions that she has no absolutely intention of stopping or committing to saving the marriage.................. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
New_girl Posted December 6, 2016 Share Posted December 6, 2016 She is clearly very heavily involved with another man, she has lied repeatedly about it, set up secret gmail accounts to communicate with him, lied about cutting contact, shown through her actions that she has no absolutely intention of stopping or committing to saving the marriage.................. Agreed on all of the above. She is having an emotional affair that she can't seem to let go of. If I were the husband, I would ask her to move out or stop all communication with this other man. I believe he has, but she's not taking him seriously. He could have packed her a bag when he saw she had an email account she was looking at, and I would say he should have EXCEPT there are kids involved. Neither party should do anything rash. What they need is separation counseling. She's done with the marriage. And if she wants to keep contacting this other guy, then she should move out. Keeping a calm head isn't easy, but you must in these situations. And stay firm to your convictions. And he needs to let go, because it's over. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts