zarb Posted November 19, 2016 Share Posted November 19, 2016 My ex and I have been separated for a year. We had a condo that we bought together and she has been living there, she moved her boy-toy in around July-August. She has tried to buy me out so that she can stay there. I've decided that I want to buy her out and make her leave. Financially, I am more than capable. I've spoken to a lawyer so I have the legal side covered. She wants me to disappear so bad then she and her FB can get out of my home. When everything was shared, how do you divide things up? The nice side of me would give her everything just to get her out, but that side is long gone. Lawyer suggested 50/50, but unless we are going to start cutting things in half that won't be a simple process. Demand more and in trade leave her alone? I don't care about staying on good terms with her, I just want her out. She was sporting a very large rock on her finger at work today, I'm done. I'm over her. Separated for a year and in the last 5 months she has moved the scum of the earth into our home, gotten herself knocked up and engaged. She can get the F out of my condo. She loved that unit, but you don't get everything you love. Link to post Share on other sites
mikeylo Posted November 19, 2016 Share Posted November 19, 2016 When it comes to the house, if you want to keep it, don't leave it. That's the first rule but most divorcing people get that once the have moved out. Well, it's not something you can ask for out of spite or whatever. Do you have kids? Where are the living? How long was the marriage? Are you in no fault state? Who is paying the mortgage? There are many variables that come into this. Just because you want it, it's not that you can have it. Since you have a lawyer, what does he say? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted November 19, 2016 Share Posted November 19, 2016 (edited) If neither of you accepts the other to buy the condo, you will be stuck dealing with each other for far too long. Where you go from here depends on whether you prefer to have peace or the condo. Though the fact that you dumped her a week before your wedding does give her the moral high ground. If you didn't want her being with this guy, you shouldn't have dumped her. You have zero justification for resentment of her. Edited November 19, 2016 by basil67 1 Link to post Share on other sites
mrs rubble Posted November 19, 2016 Share Posted November 19, 2016 Why do you want it? I was so relieved to sort the splitting of the assets after the separation and eager to move away from the memories. Make her buy you out and start again in a new place. Link to post Share on other sites
Author zarb Posted November 19, 2016 Author Share Posted November 19, 2016 Why do you want it? I was so relieved to sort the splitting of the assets after the separation and eager to move away from the memories. Make her buy you out and start again in a new place. Because I don't want her to have it. She loved that condo. The design, the location, the view, the renovations we did. It's a very hard neighborhood to get into, right beside our workplace. Her and her ****buddy-fiance will have to find a new place to live, she's pregnant, they'll be farther away from work. I might just sell it when I buy her out. Markets going up here anyway. Link to post Share on other sites
Author zarb Posted November 19, 2016 Author Share Posted November 19, 2016 When it comes to the house, if you want to keep it, don't leave it. That's the first rule but most divorcing people get that once the have moved out. Well, it's not something you can ask for out of spite or whatever. Do you have kids? Where are the living? How long was the marriage? Are you in no fault state? Who is paying the mortgage? There are many variables that come into this. Just because you want it, it's not that you can have it. Since you have a lawyer, what does he say? We didn't marry, we bought the condo together and broke up a week before the wedding. From a legal standpoint, it needs to get divided 50/50. We always alternated months on who paid the mortgage. Either we sell and split the profits, or one buys the other out. We are supposed to make a list of everything that is owned and write the replacement value, try and split the value equally. We don't have kids, I moved out because I thought if she had time she'd come to her senses. Link to post Share on other sites
Marc878 Posted November 19, 2016 Share Posted November 19, 2016 Surprise. The separation was to move the other man in. It always is. Learn from that one. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author zarb Posted November 19, 2016 Author Share Posted November 19, 2016 Surprise. The separation was to move the other man in. It always is. Learn from that one. Within a year she moved in her ex-fiance, got knocked up and engaged to him. And tries to blame the break up on me. Sure. Link to post Share on other sites
oldshirt Posted November 20, 2016 Share Posted November 20, 2016 Note to other Loveshack members: This is reason #127 of the 1001 reasons we tell people not to be the one to move out of the marital home if their partner is messing around. It's always harder getting the person residing in the home out than it is the person who initially moved out. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
oldshirt Posted November 20, 2016 Share Posted November 20, 2016 Not to address Zarb and the original question: You still have much emotion and resentment and passion here. Dividing properties and assets requires cold, hard facts and legalities. This is why we hire lawyers. Lawyers are dispassionate 3rd parties that we hire to give us unbiased legal and financial advise. Tell the lawyer your general objectives and then do what the lawyer says. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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