Just found out that co-worker is married to a whore!

[FolderWife]

Apparently, a coworker that I am close with is seperated from his wife...and she'd found somene else.

 

His wife and this guy have slept together, but he said, "I guess it's not technically cheating, since she told me about it." I said, "Some other guy had his dick in her! IT'S CHEATING!"

 

 

I feel aweful...I wish I hadn't said that. He wants to reconcile, and they may reconcile. This happened four months ago, and I just now found out about it, because someone said they 'heard' it, so I asked him flat out if the rumor was true.

 

And it is

 

if you knew this guy, you'd feel aweful. He's gorgeous, generous, nice, sweet, giving, and clean, AND a hard worker.

 

She looks like a frog, she's rude, loud, obnoxious, and now apparently a whore too.

 

He said he spent a month on their couch, and he'd hear her upstairs on the phone. Then he found condoms and confronted her with them, and she confessed, and he moved out.

 

But she's still seeing the guy, and he wants to reconcile with her

 

UGH! "not technically cheating" He can do better

[Moose]

Sound to me his a door mat, and doesn't mind being one.

[FolderWife]

Poor guy He's in love. I can't judge him I guess, because I put up with a lot...but I think that's a little bit much. I feel like I have my limits, and this would definately be one

[crazy_grl]

I so thought this thread was going to be about a guy who's wife is a prostitute...

 

And um... so are you asking a question?

[alphamale]

Originally posted by FolderWife

He's gorgeous, generous, nice, sweet, giving, and clean, AND a hard worker.

Yep! Just as I thought....once more strike against the 'nice guys'

[tiki]

Poor guy. He deserves someone better. I hope it all works out.

[Cecelius]

The nicer the guy, the more they cheat...

 

Another story that goes into the never-getting-married folder

[alphamale]

Originally posted by Cecelius

The nicer the guy, the more they cheat...

that's funny CECELIUS....most of the "nice guys" I know cannot even get dates!

[westernxer]

It's his problem if he puts up with it.

 

Don't let this get to you...

[Sal Paradise]

He needs to grow a backbone.

[SoleMate]

A "whore" is a woman who has sex for pay. Why are you using that term here?

 

I think you get very emotional, maybe you better stay out of other people's sex lives.

[XNemesisX]

Do you have a thing for him FolderWife?

 

No but really...you don't know the dynamics of that relationship. There are always two sides to every story

[Iluvsiamese]

I agree with XNemesisX. It is seldom obvious what is going on within a relationship. If you met my ex, you would probably think the same things about him. Nice looking, nice guy, hard worker, giving etc. However, within the relationship was a whole 'nother story. I am sure that there are many of our former aquaintances who classify me with this woman you term a "whore." And none of them have any notion why I left him. None of them really care either as it is alot more fun to believe his lies since they are much more "exciting" than the truth.

 

Yes, he is nice looking, but he is unable to care for anyone other than himself. Even his mother made that statement. He admitted to me that he never loved me or cared for me, but he just wanted a wife and kids so he lied. He was completely disinterested in his wife and kids. Even now, it is all about his convenience when it comes to seeing his kids.

 

Yes, he is a nice guy, polite etc. Lies through his teeth though and believes it. As long as you agree with him and stroke his ego or provide him with something, either monetary or material as long as he stands to gain, then you are a nice person too. However, disagree or refuse him something and you will see his true colors.

 

Works hard at what he wants to work at. Sports, watching tv and his "business" which never made money. That was my job. He took everything I had (including my inheritance of $85,000) and left me with 50% of his business debt. He did nothing around the house--didn't take out the garbage, didn't mow the lawn (which I put in myself) didn't maintain the house (again, my job,) or the cars or anything. I shovelled the driveway in the winter and so on.

 

Giving? Oh yes, but always with strings attached. You can bet that he would be the first to help anyone who asked. But you can also bet that he expected something in return. He was forever helping the neighbours, which is laudable, but I'm sure they wondered why he was helping them with their driveway (they had a snowblower) which his wife shovelled his own. They weren't stupid so I expect that they figured it out.

 

The only time he paid any attention to me was when he wanted sex and it was always on his times and terms. He would snore in front of the tv all evening while I dealt with housework, homework, kids etc and then when he woke at 2:30 am, he figured it was time for fun and games. His approach was stellar "Do you mind if I stick it in?" and as far as he was concerned if it worked for him then it must work for me. He considered himself an expert in women and wouldn't listen to me. He even believed that he knew everything about labour and childbirth! Rich.

 

We agreed to separate and began divorce proceedings. However, he decided that it was his house too and that he would continue to live there even though he had somewhere else to go and I didn't. Ugh. He slept in the king sized bed (which he always claimed hurt his back and normally he slept on the couch) and I slept on the living room floor. It was at this point that, in the process of trying to get my life back, I met someone else. So what did he do? He went and told everyone that I was cheating on him and lied about the separation and impending divorce.

 

Yes, he is a real gem. Just be careful what labels you hand out.

[lindya]

Certainly doesn't sound like a marriage made in heaven. She's out having sex with guys, and he's busy discussing intimate problems in his relationship with a co-worker who sounds as if she's just a little bit too emotionally involved.

 

I wonder which came first.

[Craig]

No matter how thin you slice it . . .

Originally posted by XNemesisX

There are always two sides to every story

Is this the story of a good guy or just another tale of a player maintaining his trap line.

[FolderWife]

Originally posted by lindya

Certainly doesn't sound like a marriage made in heaven. She's out having sex with guys, and he's busy discussing intimate problems in his relationship with a co-worker who sounds as if she's just a little bit too emotionally involved.

 

I wonder which came first.

 

Spoken like a truly jaded woman

 

He kept this to himself since March! hello! The only reason that I found out about it, is because his wife is out telling everyone that "he left her" So someone who works with her told my best friend, and my best friend told me, and I asked him. He denied it at first, but as soon as he heard why I was asking, he felt it necessary to clear things up.

 

If you all knew the two of them, you'd totally see that he's the truthful one. Everyone that knows both of them knows how he is, and they know how she is. He's a nice guy, and she's walking all over him.

 

What's this "too emotionally involved" bull crap that you all are pulling I don't have feelings for him. We work closely together. I rarely ever speak to him, unless it's work related. I just nosied into his private life, and pulled out a lot of juice. It just really pisses me off, and I wish I could help him, but I can't, so I thought I'd come here and see what your opinions were (aka, if they were the same as mine) but you all are always looking for ulterior motives to everything!

 

ulterior motive 1: There's no way that he's innocent in all of this

ulterior motive 2: He and I MUST be having an affair for him to tell me this...even though it's now four months since this started, and I'm just hearing anything about it. I suppose the two other women that he told must be sleeping with him too!

ulterior motive 3: He must be a player; this guy never flirts with me...EVER. I always get hit on, but he never flirts with me or any other woman. He's the only guy that I've met who's like that.

ulterior motive 4: It's his fault that she had to go elsewhere for sex...even though SHE'S the one that got bored and asked him to sleep on the couch, so she could talk to her lover on the phone in their bedroom

 

There's something wrong with you people. I just needed to express this, because I was filled in with ALL of this so fast, and I didn't know how to handle it...it's hard to go from respecting a loving relationship one minute, and to hear that it's been destroyed the next! I didn't know how to react. I came here (sorry, forgot to ask the question) looking for advice on keeping my nose out of it. I just felt awful, and I needed to talk, so I called my husband, but he wasn't home yet, so to avoid gossiping to co workers about his personal problems, I came here!

 

Just because I'm concerned for a friend doesn't mean that I'm sleeping with him! or that I'm too emotionally involved! And just because he SEEMS like a nice guy, that doesn't mean that he ISN'T a nice guy!

 

Good GRIEF! After reading some of these comments, I've lost a lot of respect for opinions at this place. You all have been hurt and screwed over so many times, that you can't be objective any more!

[FolderWife]

And P.S. To all you smart elecs who defined "Whore" as a Prostitute, I KNOW that's what whore means. In my area, that's what we call a slut...we call her a whore! I didn't mean anything stupid by it. When I finally got to tell my husband about all of this last night, you know what he said? "She's a whore isn't she!" My best friend,"I always knew that she was a whore!"

 

So you see, it's a term...EXCUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSE ME!!!

[westernxer]

Originally posted by lindya

...sounds as if she's just a little bit too emotionally involved.

 

I agree.

 

 

Originally posted by Craig

...just another tale of a player maintaining his trap line.

 

This was my first impression.

[Pocky]

Originally posted by FolderWife

And P.S. To all you smart elecs who defined "Whore" as a Prostitute, I KNOW that's what whore means. In my area, that's what we call a slut...we call her a whore! I didn't mean anything stupid by it. When I finally got to tell my husband about all of this last night, you know what he said? "She's a whore isn't she!" My best friend,"I always knew that she was a whore!"

 

So you see, it's a term...EXCUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSE ME!!!

 

And all that really means is it's a term used by the ignorant to demean another person that they find disreputable.

[westernxer]

Originally posted by FolderWife

You all have been hurt and screwed over so many times, that you can't be objective any more!

 

There is no such thing as objectivity. Never existed, ever.

 

Calling someone a whore is not objective. The word is derogatory for a reason.

 

If you were objective, you'd say she was a woman who liked having sex with others. But this is what you said...

 

She looks like a frog, she's rude, loud, obnoxious, and now apparently a whore too.

 

Hardly objective. Just admit it and we'll forgive you, but don't get defensive on us.

[A Fly onThe Wall]

Originally posted by FolderWife

I just nosied into his private life, and pulled out a lot of juice.

 

Your first mistake

[FolderWife]

F*ck all of you. You're all pathetic I'm really pissed now

[FolderWife]

Originally posted by Pocky

And all that really means is it's a term used by the ignorant to demean another person that they find disreputable.

 

Said like a truly ignorant person.

 

 

Originally posted by westernxr

 

quote:Originally posted by lindya

...sounds as if she's just a little bit too emotionally involved.

 

 

 

I agree.

 

 

 

quote:Originally posted by Craig

...just another tale of a player maintaining his trap line.

 

 

 

This was my first impression.

 

And you're God, so of course, you're right.

[Pocky]

[westernxer]

Originally posted by FolderWife

F*ck all of you. You're all pathetic I'm really pissed now

 

Stop getting so emotional... no wonder you hate that guy's wife so much.

 

Originally posted by FolderWife

And you're God, so of course, you're right.

 

Is this an objective statement?

 

By the way, I'd rather be the devil.