Gawd! That last horrible job is still a pain and I was laid off last Friday!

[HokeyReligions]

Friday: July 8 - laid off (was happy about it becuase the place sucked!)

 

Saturday: July 9 - Mom falls & is rushed to hospital

 

Sunday: July 10 - Mom comes home, bruised and sore but I can care for her

 

 

Monday: July 11 - Mom's 79th birthday. I make some calls, send out some resumes, start the job search. Mom's is in a lot of pain and is a bit less coherent than yesterday. She's slept in her chair for two nights because of the pain

 

Tuesday: July 12 - Mom's visiting nurse is over. I can't rouse mom much and she's mumbling about her dog Muffin who died a few years ago, and about a cat we've never had. I get an email from my former boss wanting me to come in and sign some paperwork (?) The visiting nurse, Keith, is concerned about mom's lethargy and mental state. I had already put in a call to her doctor. Keith also calls. Doctor calls back and we tell him what's going on and that Keith suggested that he see mom today. I tell doctor that I can't lift and carry her to get her into or out of the car and up to his office. Her doctor said absolutly not to bring her there, but to call 911 and get her to the hospital. Hubbby & Keith are sitting there in front of mom and I and discussing swimming pools while I'm on the phone to 911. Before I finish the call, Hubby takes Keith outside to look at our pool---Keith wanted to see it and ask about it because he and his wife are considering one.

 

I get mom's dog locked in her bathroom and here comes the ambulance and a fire truck (they were here on Saturday when mom fell too) and again we have about six guys in the house. I walk to the back door while the EMTs are checking mom out and holler that I need some help and ask Keith to give the EMTs mom's vitals.

 

They get mom to the hospital and I'm there with her. She's in bad shape.

 

Wednesday: July 13 - I have a phone call on my answering machine from my old job telling me that they have my check and they won't release it until I come in and sign some termination paperwork. I don't think so! I emailed them and told them that my mother was quite ill and back in the hospital. I have just come from the hospital and a meeting with mom's doctor---who took one look at me and had a conference with hubby and Mom's doc put ME on Xanax for stress. My blood pressure is off the charts right now. In my email to my old job I tell them that I am having bloodpressure problems and am now on medication and can't drive and to send me my check. I was specific in stating that I have nothing that belongs to the company--which I don't. I also said that I can't afford the gas and wear&tear on the van to drive up there anyway and to send me the check.

 

She told me she would give me a good reference (which I had doubts about anyway) but I thought we left on decent terms. They could still cause me some problems and I wouldn't put it past them to try and deny my unemployment, which would be stupid on their part. The money has already been paid and its based on what I earned in the year before I worked there anyway. The last time I filed for unemployment I only collected a couple of checks before I was working again so I never even used all of that. But that evil woman there is so vindictive! I've stayed in touch with a couple people there that I was friends with (via IM or cell phone -- not company email) and they said its been horrible there and the evil one screams at everyone about everything. I was the go-between before, now there is no supervisor running interference because her whipping boy (me) is gone.

 

I'm a mess right now. Mom may not come home again. Her doctor is keeping her in the hospital for a few days to make sure she meets the requirements for the nursing home and from there, if she is strong enough, she is going to have stints put in on the 22nd and then come home. If she is not well enough then she will be transferred to the crappy little state-run home about 10 miles from us. No TVs no phone, 4 to a room, and poor care. We thought we had hospice set up, but mom is not meeting those requirements and can't be home alone and I have to be able to leave sometimes to look for work, or hopefully, find a job and go to work every day.

 

Oh, and we talked to a realtor friend of ours and looked at our finances and our equity in the house (we've been here 10 years) and the condition of the house, etc. and the house requires so much repair work right now (needs ALL new floors and some other pricey repairs) that it is more than our equity in the house and because of the repairs, we would have to sell at such a low price we could end up losing money on it! It would be better if we could stay here and try to fix the things that need fixing and then sell. But we don't have the money and I'm at a point right now where I'm ready to walk out the front door and not look back! We are selling what we can in garage sales, but not making much (garage sales around here don't garner much -- I sold a leather recliner in perfect condition for five dollars because that's all I could get for it. I'm trying to learn how to sell on-line now. I have some nice things, but I don't have the market here for them. I have tons of Hallmark collectible ornaments, and a bunch of 1960's teen magazines and Beatles bubblegum cards, and a few thousand dollars worth of Lionel trains and accessories---some antiques. I need a larger market for these things. I sold a solid wood bedroom suite that cost about $1,400 20 years ago, for $75. A highboy, headboard, triple dresser with mirrored and lighted hutch, and a bedside table with two drawers. It was in good condition. We've been trying to sell it for several years and the most we ever were offered was $100 some years ago and we decied to hold on to it because it is good furniture, but now we took the $75.

 

I'm rambling. I've tried so hard for so long to pay all the medical bills and take care of the family. We have not had a vacation since way before we bought the house, and with mom living with us we have never been able to get ahead. I still owe so much for my hospital visit last December and on hubby's medical bills from his various surgeries. My dog has a lump on her foot that needs to be looked at and none of them are current on their shots.

 

Where's my Xanax?

[laRubiaBonita]

oh, my Darling i feel soo for you.

 

 

i can suggest consignment, if you have any good shops around, but ebay, any online selling would be cool.

 

i, too, am going to start dabbling in that.

 

i am not sure what state you are in, besides ther over-stressd state, but definatley check into any type of grants they maybe able to swing....even look fotr a job in a different state, with better state elder care.

 

It WILL all work out, and things WILL get better, i just know it..

 

at least you can spend some time with your mother. even if she in unaware at times, that you are there.....i am sure she knows in her heart.

 

cry, be strong, yell, laugh......what ever you need to do, do it.

[shygurl]

Hey Hokey,

I'm so sorry you're going through all of this, your Mom too - and that your husband is really no support to you at all.

 

It sounds like you have some very valuable items you could sell.........have you ever heard of or considered having someone sell them on Ebay for you? I've just heard about this recently...there's actually people out there who will sell your stuff.....they'll make up the listing, they'll do the advertising, etc..............and of course they get a cut of whatever you make. It seems a shame to let some of the great stuff you have just go for dirt cheap.........??