Guinevere04 Posted July 14, 2005 Posted July 14, 2005 He is in the house. He only gives me child support about every three weeks which doesn't even come close to paying a weeks worth of child care. He has only paid 1/2 the house payment 3 times in 7 months and a credit card bill twice in 7 months. I have paid all of the credit card bills, house payments, car payments, day care, everything because I don't want my credit ruined. I have filled for custody and support and our pretrial date is Aug 26. I know nothing will be accomplished that day but another court date determined. I have consulted with a credit counseling place that I pay $35 a month and they pay our creditors so that they stop calling and there are no more late charges. Now, my question is. Since I am the one that called this place, I don't want it coming back that I am assuming total responsibility for the debt and it will be coming out of my checking acct. He hasn't helped in the past but it just scared me that I am signing for my checking acct to be debited and his name not be on anything. Also, am I foolish to pay this $35? They are getting my interest rates down and if our house sells we can pay everything off. If the dumba$$ would just help me things would be so much easier. I am doing the best I can and he does nothing. If all else fails, bankrutpcy looks better and better. I haven't signed the papers on the credit counseling program yet, just thought maybe someone else may have had a similar experience and advice.
quankanne Posted July 14, 2005 Posted July 14, 2005 my husband and I got the assistance of a credit counselling program several years ago, and that really worked to our advantage, because the bills were much more manageable. The only thing we couldn't do was get a loan through our credit union while we in that program, but then again, we were able to pay things off fairly quickly. So, I'd say that in a situation like mine -- and yours -- it's a great solution. I think what worries me more is the fact that your credit is tied into his. I know I've seen published statements in the ad section of our local paper (and Thrifty Nickel) from people saying that "as of X date, I am no long responsible for debts incurred by NAME OF PERSON." not sure if you have to line that up through a lawyer or what, but that might help keep your credit safe if you could find a way to legally wash your hands of his attempts to do whatever he wants at your financial expense. best of luck to Guinevere -- I've never understood those ass monkeys who "claim" they love their children, but will fight tooth and nail to avoid paying child support. Don't they understand that it's not their former spouse who it benefits, even though that person is paying child rearing costs with that money?
shygurl Posted July 14, 2005 Posted July 14, 2005 Originally posted by Guinevere04 He is in the house. He only gives me child support about every three weeks which doesn't even come close to paying a weeks worth of child care. He has only paid 1/2 the house payment 3 times in 7 months and a credit card bill twice in 7 months. I have paid all of the credit card bills, house payments, car payments, day care, everything because I don't want my credit ruined. I have filled for custody and support and our pretrial date is Aug 26. I know nothing will be accomplished that day but another court date determined. I have consulted with a credit counseling place that I pay $35 a month and they pay our creditors so that they stop calling and there are no more late charges. Now, my question is. Since I am the one that called this place, I don't want it coming back that I am assuming total responsibility for the debt and it will be coming out of my checking acct. He hasn't helped in the past but it just scared me that I am signing for my checking acct to be debited and his name not be on anything. Also, am I foolish to pay this $35? They are getting my interest rates down and if our house sells we can pay everything off. If the dumba$$ would just help me things would be so much easier. I am doing the best I can and he does nothing. If all else fails, bankrutpcy looks better and better. I haven't signed the papers on the credit counseling program yet, just thought maybe someone else may have had a similar experience and advice. You should be able to get the answers to these questions from the Credit Counselling place....about whether your doing this will be, in essence, your taking full responsibility for the debt and essentially letting him off the hook (or giving the appearance of same). Ask them, I'm sure they can give you the answers. If you don't trust to get the answers from them, consider contacting an attorney who deals with bankruptcy (look in the yellow pages of your phone book under Attorneys, and look through the listings to find those who specialize in bankruptcy law - even though that's not what you're doing now, they should be well versed in this whole "area" and be best able to advise you ,particularly with regards to laws in your state). I don't know how it works there but many times in the past, for various things, I've called up law firms and asked if I could speak with one of the lawyers there about a simple question I had........and almost always they would have a lawyer call me back, for free, and answer my questions.
shygurl Posted July 14, 2005 Posted July 14, 2005 Also............I think it's very very wise of you to be doing what you're doing........to try and save your credit from being ruined. I say stick with it if you can because if you were to file for bankruptcy and you've got that on your record, it's often difficult to find a place to rent or even get hooked up with Utility places ..if you don't have good credit. Also...........as for the credit card debt, is this particular credit card one that your husband is continuing to use? Is it in his name also? Whose name is it in - his but you also have a card? Or the other way around? If it's in YOUR name but he also has card under yours, in his name....contact the CC company ASAP and find out how to go about having him removed off the card........you don't want him incuring more debt, let him get his own dang card. And ask them what you do if he's continuing to rack up debt at this time............will you be responsible at all for new debt that he's incurred since you 2 split up? You could also call up other well known Credit Counselling places and ask your questions.......so you feel confident that you're getting the correct answers from the place you're dealing with now. Just do a search on Google. Here's one I found, they have a toll free #, maybe you could call them up and just ask them your questions....don't tell them you're currently dealing with any particular Cred Coun. place......just say you need to get more info so that you can decide how to proceed: http://consumercredit.com/ (this is a non-profit Cred coun place)
Lil Honey Posted July 14, 2005 Posted July 14, 2005 I am in a similar situation. We had credit cards that were in both of our names. Some of the credit cards can have the other person removed. Some of the credit cards required that new cards be issued instead of dropping one person. If there is a balance, you can have the card account closed, but both of you will still be responsible to pay off the balance. This way you would have the peace of mind that he couldn't ADD TO the balance. Like Guinevere04, I am paying the mortgage payment as well as my rent. Things are really tight, especially since I had some medical bills flood in recently. I keep my fingers crossed that my car doesn't die. But I'm here to say that I'm keeping my head above water. It CAN be done. Good luck.
Author Guinevere04 Posted July 14, 2005 Author Posted July 14, 2005 shygurl - his name is on some of the accts but he was authorized user on most because his credit was ugly from his first marriage where neither of them cared about their credit. I helped him get his credit back over the last 8 years and he knows that I will still take care of my credit so that's why he is being this way. I closed ALL accts after I realized he was still using them buying beer and gas and taking girls on dates. The credit counselor, when I asked about it appearing as though I am taking full responsibility for it all, said the main thing is that I am trying to get out of debt. I have actually spoken to a bankruptcy lawyer because if the spousal support that I am requesting (1/2 of all joint debts via spousal support so I know if gets paid) does not get granted, I am filing bankruptcy. The bankr. lawyer said that after Oct 17 of this year anyone filing bankr. has to go to credit counseling anyway. I'll die if I have to file, but you can't do but so much without going cRaZy. So I may call him back and see what he says as far as signing up before we go to court, which will be a good 4 months away. If only someone would just buy our house.
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