Ex-girlfriend contacted me after getting married

[Dia Mata]

We had been together for about two years. We did most things boyfriend/girlfriend could do together. Then, I had few things in my life I needed to sort out before we move in together. This made her to feel that I was not giving her the attention she wanted. So, she started communication with another guy and finally she said that they guy wanted to meet her to talk because he wanted to marry her.

 

I told her that was entirely her decision to meet him but we will have to ended our relationship. She asked if we could remain friends; I said no. She cried a lot and said a lot of things, some which I found a bit threatening. In the end, I ended the relationship. Later, I apologized to her for the way I ended the relationship, but she was getting none of it. So, I decided the best way for both of us was to cut all communication.

 

She started a relationship with the new guy and put a lot of pictures on Facebook showing how they were having fun and all that. I didn't do anything. Then, she got engaged and married to the guy so quickly. As for me, I focused on doing my stuff I really wanted to accomplish. I made myself a promise that I won't engage into another serious relationship until after a year and a half.

 

Then, one evening I was having a night out with friends. It was probably my best night since breaking up with her. When I was about to give the girl a good night kiss, a text arrived in my phone. The girl stopped and asked me to read the text first as she thought it might be important. I took my phone and it was my ex text asking me how I was doing. This was completely out of the blue and just about two months after she got married.

 

I was very surprised (even the girl sensed this) because I honestly believed that my ex has moved on by getting married and that she will never contact me again. I replied to her text three days later saying I was doing fine. She replied immediately thanking me for responding to her text and wished me well. I texted her back wishing her well too and that was it.

 

My question is why the hell after cutting off all the communication for almost a year, she still contacted me? And why she contacted me two months after getting married?

[Sweetfish]

We had been together for about two years. We did most things boyfriend/girlfriend could do together. Then, I had few things in my life I needed to sort out before we move in together. This made her to feel that I was not giving her the attention she wanted. So, she started communication with another guy and finally she said that they guy wanted to meet her to talk because he wanted to marry her.

 

I told her that was entirely her decision to meet him but we will have to ended our relationship. She asked if we could remain friends; I said no. She cried a lot and said a lot of things, some which I found a bit threatening. In the end, I ended the relationship. Later, I apologized to her for the way I ended the relationship, but she was getting none of it. So, I decided the best way for both of us was to cut all communication.

 

She started a relationship with the new guy and put a lot of pictures on Facebook showing how they were having fun and all that. I didn't do anything. Then, she got engaged and married to the guy so quickly. As for me, I focused on doing my stuff I really wanted to accomplish. I made myself a promise that I won't engage into another serious relationship until after a year and a half.

 

Then, one evening I was having a night out with friends. It was probably my best night since breaking up with her. When I was about to give the girl a good night kiss, a text arrived in my phone. The girl stopped and asked me to read the text first as she thought it might be important. I took my phone and it was my ex text asking me how I was doing. This was completely out of the blue and just about two months after she got married.

 

I was very surprised (even the girl sensed this) because I honestly believed that my ex has moved on by getting married and that she will never contact me again. I replied to her text three days later saying I was doing fine. She replied immediately thanking me for responding to her text and wished me well. I texted her back wishing her well too and that was it.

 

My question is why the hell after cutting off all the communication for almost a year, she still contacted me? And why she contacted me two months after getting married?

 

Clear her soul for her bad deeds?

[basil67]

Why is she contacting you?

 

That's a really good question and one which can form the basis of your reply text. "why are you contacting me?"

[Cephalopod]

Ego feeding. She's immature and needs more attention than one man can give her.

 

Be glad you broke up with her. She's an attention junkie. Your answering her text was the affirmation she needed to know that you still consider her worthy to still talk to, and in that sense she feels she has an emotional hook in you. Pull the hook out and move on and never answer her texts again.

[Marc878]

Your reply should have been "crickets"

 

Now block her number.

[LastAcorn99]

While I have no possible answer to your questions, given what you shared, i would suggest that you keep your distance from your ex. Since she is married, you don’t want to find yourself coming in the way of her relationship with her husband. Take care – stay strong!

[Superchicken]

I foresee problems here.

Both for you and her.

Not only, are you going to spiral out of control (Its already started, because you brought it up here), but your life will be impacted severely, to a point that you wont be able to meet "Real" girls to date, or care about.

Don't have this in the back of your mind, when your next date says to you "So what ya thinking about "..

 

 

Prophecy...... DOOM and GLOOM.

 

 

Ted.

[ExpatInItaly]

You should have flat-out asked her what she wanted.

 

One of my exes did the same. He told me this big sob story about how he shouldn't have married her, how he wasn't sure he made the right choice, blah blah blah.

 

My response was along the lines of, "Gee, what a shame. Have a nice life!"

[Formerfiveo]

My ex-fiance (a serial cheater, narcissist, and liar) contacted me 2 months after I got married and said, "Are you happy?" This was 9 years (!) after I broke off our engagement.

 

I replied, "Never been happier. Go away and do not contact me again."

 

I changed my email address and blocked him everywhere else.

 

All he was looking for was a ego stroke and to see if the door was still open to put his foot in.

[elaine567]

All he was looking for was a ego stroke and to see if the door was still open to put his foot in.

Yes.

.....................................

[LargoLagg]

Why is she contacting you?

 

That's a really good question and one which can form the basis of your reply text. "why are you contacting me?"

Hey, that's what I was going to say! If you really want to know, you should ask. However, this might be more appropriate for a newly married ex who is now texting you:

 

Does your husband know you're texting me??

[kendahke]

 

My question is why the hell after cutting off all the communication for almost a year, she still contacted me? And why she contacted me two months after getting married?

 

because she wanted to.

 

I wouldn't have responded.

 

Also, she'd have been on block. That she wasn't means you are giving lip service to moving on by leaving doors open to her to get in contact with you. She's got a husband to be friends with. Let her be content with what she has. Why she needs the attention of someone who is not her lawful husband should be troubling enough to leave her alone.

[Dia Mata]

Thanks guys for the advice.