Adding an (attractive) acquintance from the past

[Stilnaught]

Hi all,

 

my cousin has a cousin from her other half of the family (so we're totally unrelated) who has my age. A cute girl, with whom she always had a very good bond.

 

This girl has been in a relationship in her late teens/early twenties, became single, had another boyfriend for a year or so, and has been on the dating field since (3-4 years). Reportedly, she's a "slow catch" who's not thàt much out to get a guy, but who'd like to have kids later on etc etc.

 

I only met her every now and then, and thus we both know each other mostly from stories and inquiries about my cousins family, in both directions. It must have been about 2 years since i last saw her at a party and talked to her, as we both moved out of town.

 

Lately, my cousin has been talking more often about her. I suspect her of trying to match us, as she's always talking about how often she asks how i'm doing, and most of all she keeps repeating: "add her on facebook, just talk to her!".

 

How awkward is adding someone on facebook in these circumstances, if you're mid-twenties and post-college? Since she's a truly attractive girl, i'd give it a go, but i don't want to blow it by being clumsy with a random add, as that would be slightly annoying with my cousin involved ...

 

Also, how would you guys (/girls) get a conversation going with such an old acquintance?

[oldbutcurious]

if your mutual cousin have already suggested you add her on FB, then, you'll only have to accept. with a click. you did not even have to say hi, or maybe, you should. but over at chat/messenger. it has gone much easier, see?

 

back in our days, we had to dial, wait for the endless ringing of phone, say hello to the stranger on the other end of the line , introduce ourselves if necessary ( and be nervous wondering who was that - his mom, dad, sister, brother, uncle, the whole clan?), then wait as the target person is being called...

 

you see, internet has made many things much easier, with the click of a finger.

[Stilnaught]

you see, internet has made many things much easier, with the click of a finger.

 

Oddly enough, also much harder. There seems to have spawned an (n)etiquette with some absurd rules. Which makes me wonder about how awkward this actually is, if i start talking to her right away.

[PegNosePete]

makes me wonder about how awkward this actually is, if i start talking to her right away.

You'll never know if you don't try.

[clia]

You've met her before and you have a mutual cousin. It's not awkward at all to send her a friend request, in my opinion, and I wouldn't really consider it to be a "random add." But, assuming she accepts, don't pounce right away with private messages and such. Just roll with it for awhile, like some of her posts, make a comment here and there if appropriate, and see what evolves. You want to get yourself on her radar.

[Stilnaught]

Thanks guys, you tipped me over

 

Unfortunately, she seems to be fully passive on social media: just liking the stuff she's tagged in. Finding a solid ground for a good conversation will be a matter of time and chance.

[MidwestUSA]

Thanks guys, you tipped me over

 

Unfortunately, she seems to be fully passive on social media: just liking the stuff she's tagged in. Finding a solid ground for a good conversation will be a matter of time and chance.

 

Be patient. I befriended a guy with a lot of mutual friends in February 2012. We met in person in May, but didn't actually go on a date until June. We were married a year later.

 

You just never know!