Danny32 Posted December 12, 2016 Share Posted December 12, 2016 I already started another thread about my situation with my spouse and his pregnant mistress. I was wondering if your spouse got his affair partner pregnant or your wife got knocked up by another man, would you file for divorce immediately? Would you possibly consider counseling or say the hell with it? If you stay in the marriage, what would be your reason? Link to post Share on other sites
Philosoraptor Posted December 12, 2016 Share Posted December 12, 2016 My wife and I are agreed that cheating is grounds for divorce on both our ends. There is nothing that should bubble to that point as long as we communicate well. We also respect each other enough to end the relationship before forsaking our vows. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. Lucky Posted December 12, 2016 Share Posted December 12, 2016 I was wondering if your spouse got his affair partner pregnant or your wife got knocked up by another man, would you file for divorce immediately? What you're facing is much harder than the already difficult challenges of getting over an affair. Instead of NC, you've got decades of potential co-parenting and continued hurt and resentment. So yes, I'd divorce and advise anyone similarly placed to do the same... Mr. Lucky 3 Link to post Share on other sites
RecentChange Posted December 12, 2016 Share Posted December 12, 2016 My husband cheated (not a serial cheater I may add), and we reconciled which I do not regret. But if he had gotten someone pregnant? No way, it would be over. He can go live his new path, with his new child, ans his new woman, I wouldn't be any part of that 1 Link to post Share on other sites
road Posted December 12, 2016 Share Posted December 12, 2016 I do not think I could be a dad to an OC. I do not think a WW that would be willing to stay married to her BH that would not share in the work to raise or be a dad to the OC. Unless the OM went NC as soon as he found out he knocked up his AP/WW and she needed her BH's financial support. Link to post Share on other sites
mikeylo Posted December 13, 2016 Share Posted December 13, 2016 It doesn't matter what we would do. What matters a can you live with a guy who has got another woman on the side with his child and is paying child support and visiting while taking all that was supposed to be for the kids you had together? OTOH, why give that OW everything that is supposed to be yours easily ? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Danny32 Posted December 13, 2016 Author Share Posted December 13, 2016 It doesn't matter what we would do. What matters a can you live with a guy who has got another woman on the side with his child and is paying child support and visiting while taking all that was supposed to be for the kids you had together? OTOH, why give that OW everything that is supposed to be yours easily ? This is my struggle at this time. That's why I was wondering what you think you would do if your were in this situation. Like I said with my other thread I started, its easy to say what you would do until your actually in the situation. I think its coming down to doing what's best for me. Either leave or either try to make it work and see if we can somehow get past it. I need more time to make that decision. I truly don't know if I want to try at this point but I also don't know if I want to file an annulment right away. I'm really torn but I think in time I will make the right decision for me. I just wish I could talk to someone who has actually been in this situation to get their opinion. If they stayed and what helped them to come to that decision? Or if they left, did they leave right away or did it take awhile. I read a story online where a woman stayed for two years after her husband's love child but she could no longer deal with it and left. I also read stories to where woman have stayed and the marriage became stronger if that even makes sense. It's all so confusing. Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted December 13, 2016 Share Posted December 13, 2016 Like I said with my other thread I started, its easy to say what you would do until your actually in the situation. So why are you asking what we would do...? For what it's worth I would immediately divorce, do not pass go, do not collect £200. see if we can somehow get past it. If you stay together then you can never "get past" it. She will always be a part of his life. FOREVER, and so will the child. Every time he goes to visit his child or his child comes to visit you, you will be reminded that he cheated on you and got another woman pregnant. You can never get past it because you will be constantly reminded. I just wish I could talk to someone who has actually been in this situation to get their opinion. There may not be many here in your exact position but there are many, many people here who have been cheated on. Myself included. I filed for divorce immediately and did not regret it once. Had my ex gotten pregnant... it would not have made a difference. I would still have divorced ASAP. Cheating is cheating is cheating, is a deal breaker. Link to post Share on other sites
Robert Posted December 13, 2016 Share Posted December 13, 2016 We'll close this up as there is a concurrent thread on the same topic. Please post there. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/separation-divorce/605758-my-husbands-pregnant-mistress Thanks, ~6 Link to post Share on other sites
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