hawx79 Posted December 13, 2016 Share Posted December 13, 2016 What are good examples of showing confidence to impress a woman? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
LargoLagg Posted December 13, 2016 Share Posted December 13, 2016 #1 - Not posting on LS to find out! 3 Link to post Share on other sites
LargoLagg Posted December 13, 2016 Share Posted December 13, 2016 OK, I couldn't resist. #2 - Don't take too long to ask her out. #3 - Be just as confident with men as you are with anybody else. #4 - Take charge when you take her out on a date. Don't ask "what would you like to do? or "what do you like to eat?" Find something to do. Have a plan B in case she hates X. Do whatever you do enthusiastically. Help her enjoy it. #5 - Be considerate and generous to other people. I think that falls in the realm of confidence. It's how you present yourself to the world that counts, not just to her. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted December 13, 2016 Share Posted December 13, 2016 IMO, my answer to a related question still applies as an example of confidence. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
CommittedToThis Posted December 13, 2016 Share Posted December 13, 2016 1. Attractiveness. This doesn't mean you're Brad Pitt, but that you practice good personal hygiene and make an attempt at having a personal style of appearance. Take some pride in your appearance, make the effort. 2. Assertiveness. This means you can speak up in a conversation, hold your own, start new topics, suggest things, etc. Just basically be yourself with no reservations, make the call and believe in it. 3. Assuredness. Believe in yourself and what you have to offer. It helps if you are passionate about something in life that you put first above all else. Mainly just believe you are a worthy person and act like it. 4. Attentiveness. Pretty much self-explanatory, but take an interest in her, ask questions, remember details about her. Be kind and attentive to other people, servers, bartenders, etc. 5. Aliveness. Show gumption, passion; take chances. Lead the way with your ideas. Have a lot of fun with the whole thing knowing that even if you strike out with this one, you're not bothered because you know you're better prepared for the next encounter. I think if you pull elements of these 5 traits together you'll have an above-average chance of getting some phone numbers and dates. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Mysterio Posted December 13, 2016 Share Posted December 13, 2016 Have interesting conversations and laughs. I think thats a direction. Yet for some reason. Its almost like you have to charm her into her wanting you to ask her out. I find I get way more play, when I borderline don't care about dating her or getting romantic with her. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
JuneJulySeptember Posted December 13, 2016 Share Posted December 13, 2016 In my experience with the world, acting like a confident guy with machismo and bravado will help you get some @ss. If you work on it and are willing to stomach a LOT of rejection, some women, possibly even the majority have an internal mechanism that attracts them to macho/take charge/borderline d@uchey guys. However, if what you are searching for is a life partner, then changing who you are to get results from the world is just taking you away from the person you truly want to be, and IMHO ... happiness. In other words, if you're a nice wuss, be proud to be a nice wuss. Keep doing nice things for people. If they step on you, that's their f@cking problem for being a@@holes, not yours... 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author hawx79 Posted December 15, 2016 Author Share Posted December 15, 2016 However, if what you are searching for is a life partner, then changing who you are to get results from the world is just taking you away from the person you truly want to be, and IMHO ... happiness. In other words, if you're a nice wuss, be proud to be a nice wuss. Keep doing nice things for people. If they step on you, that's their f@cking problem for being a@@holes, not yours... Thanks a lot for this advice, its golden for me! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
spiderowl Posted December 15, 2016 Share Posted December 15, 2016 (edited) Being honest and direct, few guys will do that. If you like her, say so. Best to get the ground work right first though: - Dress cleanly - Be clean, nice-smelling and well-groomed - Be polite - Be considerate - Be generous If you like her, show interest by spending time with her and talking with her. Ask her if she'd like a drink, fetch her a chair. These might seem little things, but they show a guy is not afraid to treat someone as special if they want to. Ask to stay in contact somehow, by phone, text, email. Be friendly and smile. Laugh about things. Find out what you both have in common in terms of interests, then suggest a way you can both share an outing to somewhere you would both enjoy. If she is not interested in that, ask her where she would like to go for an evening out. You are casually suggesting a date without spelling it out. Do not persist if she is blatantly not interested, simply turn your attention elsewhere and do not seem perturbed by a possible rejection. Edited December 15, 2016 by spiderowl 3 Link to post Share on other sites
butterfly84 Posted December 17, 2016 Share Posted December 17, 2016 #1 for me would probably be being yourself/fearless. Like not being afraid to just be you when you're around me as opposed to sometimes when people try to impress you by doing things they dont normally do. And another thing would be if you give a girl a choice, like give her your # instead of taking hers and tell her you liked talking to her and if she does or doesn't want to talk again its up to her. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
CommittedToThis Posted December 17, 2016 Share Posted December 17, 2016 If you can afford it, a great line is, "Excuse me, you're absolutely radiant, may I buy you a car?" It's been known to work. Hawk, one last suggestion: YouTube some pick-up artist videos, by both males and females. You will have to wade thru a lot of b.s. but you can pan a few gold nuggets out of the endless stream of information if you listen carefully and notice the commonalities between the varying approaches. At the end of the day it's about being yourself; I know, what a massive cliche, right? But it's true. What I've learned is that "being yourself" means you love and respect yourself and in so doing, you present a relaxed and assured presence. Everyone, male and female, feels comfortable being around someone who comes across as having it all together, someone with assurance. If you were raised by a kind and loving family, you already do. If you came from a messed-up family, you have to learn it. Either way, my friend, if you can look yourself in the mirror and say, "I am a good man, I'm smart and funny and have a great job and shred on bass guitar and I deserve to meet as many women as it takes to meet my future wife," and believe it truly, then guess what? It's gonna happen. All the best! It snowed last night so I gotta go roll around in it before it melts! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
OatsAndHall Posted December 17, 2016 Share Posted December 17, 2016 All of the advice above is excellent. My two cents may come across as a bit misogynistic but it helped me build confidence. Don't put women on a pedestal. They're just people, plain and simple. I treat them the same way I treat male friends and acquaintances: with respect and kindness. Dating life becomes much easier when you sit down across from a woman and interact with them the same way you would with anyone else. The date becomes more relaxed and more comfortable. They're not some omnipotent being that's agreed to grace you with their presence: it's just a woman and it's just a date. I know that many women like a well-dressed man. However, I dress pretty casually on a date. Jeans and a collared shirt of some kind or a sweater. I don't look like a slob but I look relaxed as well. I think that this is can show confidence as well. Plus, I'm not going to get a long well with a woman who wants to see me in slacks and a vest on a date... It kind of goes along with this little bit of b.s. machismo: "any man that sacrifices his beard for a woman deserves neither of them". 2 Link to post Share on other sites
spiderowl Posted December 17, 2016 Share Posted December 17, 2016 In my experience, most men do not show enough interest. They show some by smiling and being near to you, looking as if waiting for an opportunity, but they don't take initiative and show real interest. Those that do stand out as being stronger in some way, even if they might get turned down. They have shown they are not your average guy. I am not suggesting that anyone persist if they do not get a positive and friendly response, but taking a bit of a risk gives you a chance. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
OatsAndHall Posted December 18, 2016 Share Posted December 18, 2016 In my experience, most men do not show enough interest. They show some by smiling and being near to you, looking as if waiting for an opportunity, but they don't take initiative and show real interest. Those that do stand out as being stronger in some way, even if they might get turned down. They have shown they are not your average guy. I am not suggesting that anyone persist if they do not get a positive and friendly response, but taking a bit of a risk gives you a chance. I agree. But, this just takes some practice. I hit up an convenience store around town pretty consistently and one of the clerks compared my looks to the main character from a popular TV show. I got my receipt, immediately wrote my name and number on it and handed it over to her. I never heard from her but that didn't stop me from popping in again a few days later. She told me she was seeing someone and that's why she didn't call. I told her to hit me up if she ever became single and she laughed and said she'd "keep me updated". I still go in there on a weekly basis and say hello when she's working. I don't hit on her; I just say "hello" and go about my business. I know a lot of guys would have gotten weird when they didn't hear from the gal and wouldn't have gone into the store ever again. It get glares from the other female clerks as they probably think I'm creepy but I don't care: that's their problem. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
carnelian Posted December 24, 2016 Share Posted December 24, 2016 Here is a funny way that might work--- Keep a bag of fresh dates in your pocket. When you see an attractive girl or woman, go to her and show her your bag and ask her if she wants a date! She will laugh and make maybe take one. You have broken the ice. Maybe she likes these juicy treats--if they are fresh. If you are in a market, ask a female clerk if she has any dates? Where are her dates? I did this==gets a big laugh. Start talking. Don't try this with screws or balls. Link to post Share on other sites
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