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I'm ashamed

kades

By kades,
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kades

kades

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I ve been married for ten years. Politically I'm very liberal but about sex and r.ships I m conservative. At least I used to be. For the last few years i have a weird fantasy that I feel ashamed of it. I imagine my wife to cheat on me behind my back. I imagine her to find a lover. I want her to live passionate love. Wanna see her making love. But she should do it secretly. She doesnt have any idea about my fantasy. She'd probably kill me if she knew but I can't get turn on unless I imagine of it and I can't tell it to anyone. Actually I could hardly confess it to myself. Am I sick???

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Philosoraptor

Philosoraptor

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You're not sick, but it's clear you and your wife need to figure out how to spice things up. Communicate with her.

 

There are monogamous couples that find a way to bring these fantasies to life using toys and talk. Plenty to work with without even crossing the boundary of being with someone else.

 

Then there is also an open relationship... which would be something to bring up if everything else fails to hit the mark.

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DeeplyMissHer

DeeplyMissHer

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Maybe try porn.

I just don't see the point of opening up a marriage. Once you do and you see her with another man, there is no undoing that ****.

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Karma24

Karma24

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But she should do it secretly.

 

Here's a thought: maybe she already is? I mean, something being done in secret means you'd have no way of knowing.

 

I don't think it's sick...more like a kink or fetish. If no one gets hurt, what's the harm?

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CommittedToThis

CommittedToThis

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So called "hotwife/cuckold" couples are pretty common these days, at least around the swinging scene (I am not a swinger but I've looked into it recently as I am, after all, newly f'in single!).

 

If this is your fantasy, there is nothing to be ashamed of. It's like being ashamed if you're bi-sexual or gay. As long as no one is harmed in the process, it's all healthy and natural for you, so let the shame go.

 

For now things seem to be working for you, all you need to do is fantasize about a stranger (like, say, me LOL) sexually satisfying your wife and you are Joe Studbanger. As long as you're both enjoying the sex, and the frequency, I see no reason to do anything.

 

Just keep pretending your wife is sleeping around; if that gets old, talk to her and consider looking into the cuckold thing. Plenty of single men out there willing to help with your marital issues.

 

All the best, man. No shame, ok? You're still 100% a good man.

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Cephalopod

Cephalopod

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Maybe try porn.

I just don't see the point of opening up a marriage. Once you do and you see her with another man, there is no undoing that ****.

 

I think he's already tried porn. That's his problem.

 

Most men don't get hooked on the cuck fetish naturally. It has to be planted in the brain like a bad seed.

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BoaConstrictor

BoaConstrictor

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No, you're totally normal.

 

It's up to you and your wife if you want to keep it in the realm of fantasy or instead make it a reality. But if both of you are game, you could certainly find a "bull" who will make your cuckold fantasy real.

 

I believe CommitedToThis already volunteered. :cool:

 

So, don't worry. You can still be a card-carrying liberal and want this. It's totally within the realm of normal.

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bigman1

bigman1

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Cuckoldry is a common fantasy. There are many variations. Sub cuck, bi cuck, interracial cuck, reverse cuck, it's so many variations.

 

Try roll play. Fake it. She can make up stories. If she's not judgmental.

 

Yes Splim, that's a cyck fantasy.

 

Also, more trolls on this and similar sites work this angle.

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kades

kades

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Thanks for all the replies. Yes I ve tried porn but wife refused it. She doesnt like it. And I never mentioned about my fantasy. And I should say I want her to have a lover. I mean she should love and be loved and make love with her lover passionately. I don't say ****ing, I mean love making. Thats why this is crazy

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bubbaganoosh

bubbaganoosh

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I would think love making for you two and just plain old screwing with the other guy.

 

I don't know. Three in a bedroom make for something bad to happen.

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road

road

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I ve been married for ten years. Politically I'm very liberal but about sex and r.ships I m conservative. At least I used to be. For the last few years i have a weird fantasy that I feel ashamed of it. I imagine my wife to cheat on me behind my back. I imagine her to find a lover. I want her to live passionate love. Wanna see her making love. But she should do it secretly. She doesnt have any idea about my fantasy. She'd probably kill me if she knew but I can't get turn on unless I imagine of it and I can't tell it to anyone. Actually I could hardly confess it to myself. Am I sick???

 

I have seen this end badly many times. The marriage ends with the wife marring her new stud.

 

 

Do not do this and stop watching this type of porn.

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Cephalopod

Cephalopod

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I say don't go there. Why not take nude shots of your wife, then use Photoshop to superimpose images of men on her and in her and using her, and then jerk off to that? Just don't let her find it.

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fenix

fenix

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Thanks for all the replies. Yes I ve tried porn but wife refused it. She doesnt like it. And I never mentioned about my fantasy. And I should say I want her to have a lover. I mean she should love and be loved and make love with her lover passionately. I don't say ****ing, I mean love making. Thats why this is crazy

 

After looking to your first post I didn't see any harmful thing, there are many people who fantasies with their wife being pleasured by another man, not my thing but... if you like it whatever floats your boat.

 

But reading the above marked in bold brought a t totally different angle to it. I don't think you have a cuckold fetish but a guilty conscience... You don't love your wife and you want someone else to do that job for you because you realize she deserves to be loved.

 

Your wife loving another man or another man loving your wife is much more than a sexual act... I would go to IC to understand why you wish your wife would love someone else, it hides a huge feeling of inadequacy and low self worth.

 

Good luck, I hope you don't walk down a path you can't ever unwalk without understanding first why would you want to do something like this.

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fenix

fenix

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Oh I don't think I can tell this to an IC. I can do it here cause I can be anonymous.

Well ... IC are actually there for this kind of problems.

You need help (serious help!). You can either eat your pride and go to an IC or find what the future will have for you, but my prediction is that is not going to be happiness.

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fenix

fenix

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You mean a divorce?

 

That is a possible outcome but unhappiness can come in many different ways and your feeling of inadequacy and low self worth will never let you be happy until you decide to face yourself and understand yourself.

 

You need to heal from whatever trauma is making you feel that someone else need to be the "lover" (and I don't mean the *** buddy) of your wife.

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