When a girl I'm dating just stops texting

[Rapto]

So I have been speaking with a girl now for couple weeks (I know it's short) she's 22 and I'm 26

 

I recently came out a 4 year relationship so the dating game is little strange for me..

 

Anyhow. We have already been out twice, for a meal and then we just visited a Christmas type market in the evening.

Both times she messaged me after saying she had an amazing time etc as did I.

 

I get attached so easy and I hate it, always did in the past, to the point I feel stupid for it.

 

Anyhow, we were messaging as usual few days ago and she just stopped texting, she hasn't text me since, but she's been active on her message and seen her active on social media. I can't work it out?

Is it likely she's just thought, can't be bothered anymore? Do girls do this a lot ?

Ps. I haven't messaged her since, don't want to look desperate and clingy.

Edited December 16, 2016 by Rapto

[salparadise]

Sounds like she suddenly lost interest and is ghosting. If it happened suddenly and without apparent cause, it's probably another guy. If not, then she might just have a short attention span. No point in over analyzing. You either make'em wet or not. It's probably not anything specific you said or did.

[fromheart]

You've pretty much answered your own question there. women hate it when you get clingy.

 

Messaging is for setting up dates primarily. Don't be texting back and forth, set a date and get back to what you were doing.

 

Let her reach out to you, then set a date with her. In the meantime, work on getting rid of any clingyness.

[Erik30]

Yeah a lot of people do that unfortunately. Instead of just straight up telling you they want to end it, they'll ignore you and hope you figure it out.

 

I'm sure if you ask her what's up, she'll give you some lame excuse and say something like she was really busy so "forgot" to reply.

[Rapto]

Thanks for replies, guess I'll just leave it then, typical when you just start to like someone....

 

Not to dwell, just doesn't make sense that she was the one pursueing these dates, and messaging every morning first, now just nothing.

 

Well, guess that's just the mystery of women

[ExpatInItaly]

Before we conclude she's not interested, maybe we can clarify a couple things:

 

1) What was the nature of your previous conversation? Texting gets tedious sometimes, especially when we don't know the person well and don't have a lot to talk about yet. As someone else pointed out, it's better to use it to make plans than to get to know each other. Did the last conversation just die off, or did you ask her a question that she hasn't responded to?

 

2) Who has done most of the initiating thus far?

 

Keep in mind that some women, especially a younger or more inexperienced one, want to be chased. Rightly or wrongly, a lot of us are told to let the guy do most of the initiating in the early stages to see how interested her really is. Not a very balanced approach to dating, I realize. But it could be a factor here.

 

It's possible that she is waiting for you to contact her, and is wondering the very same thing you are. Your answers to the above questions will make it easier to understand the context.

Edited December 16, 2016 by ExpatInItaly

[Rapto]

1- my last message was just a fun message and ending and with a question, which was read and never responded to, on the back of aboit 20 messages through that day.

 

I was the one who approached her on an evening and messaged her, then asked for first date, she said yes, cancelled with an excuse so I left it- she then proceeded to message me saying she can do any day in the week and let her know time and place. Since then we've been out twice and I've really enjoyed both times, had lots of fun.

 

I just feel bit weird following up with her if she has obviously ignored my last question with a message, I mean is it chasing her or just being annoying desperately folllowing up??

[ExpatInItaly]

1- my last message was just a fun message and ending and with a question, which was read and never responded to, on the back of aboit 20 messages through that day.

 

I was the one who approached her on an evening and messaged her, then asked for first date, she said yes, cancelled with an excuse so I left it- she then proceeded to message me saying she can do any day in the week and let her know time and place. Since then we've been out twice and I've really enjoyed both times, had lots of fun.

 

I just feel bit weird following up with her if she has obviously ignored my last question with a message, I mean is it chasing her or just being annoying desperately folllowing up??

 

In that case, I would let her come to you.

 

You asked a question, so the ball is indeed in her court.