ecybris Posted July 16, 2005 Share Posted July 16, 2005 I meet Matt about 2 years ago through an old friend I no longer talk too. Well anyway we have had a really great friendship (Both guys) but every once and a while he gets odd. Like for example, he may have free time to hangout but he he always seems to weasal out of it before you can ask. His number one excuse is that he is tired and needs to go home and sleep. Yet many of those times he ends up doing something with his parents. He also likes to make plans with us or mention plans for a certain day and then never mentions it again so me and another friend assume we are all still going out. Then when we call and ask Matt it's like he forgot or has some dumb excuse for needing to be home early. Now at first you would think he is avoiding us but that is never the case. We usually talk everyday and he always makes comments about wanting to hangout. My favorite thing is that he makes it seems like the schedules of myself and another friend are causing problems with us hanging out. We bend over backwards to be able to hangout with him and he never puts in any effort. Also, let's say him and my other friend are free, he will not even ask to hangout with her at all but had him and I had the same day off he would wanna do something. I just don't understand this. He also sometimes acts like he lives a second life. I mean his parents are really nice and everything but he makes them sound bad. It's like his family life and personal life can never interact. I just hate these mind games he plays with us. I know I should say something to him but I'm said things about other stuff he has done and it does not always work. The real kicker is that he calls me and our other friend, his Best Friends. Yet we in no way feel like we are. The funny thing is that sometimes it's like he never realizes he is doing what he is doing. Another thing is that you can only call him on his cell which he turns off when at home. He cannot call from is house phone because of no long distance. He makes it sound ok if we call him but then the next minute he does not. So basically if he has a day off you usually cannot get a hold of him. I just need advice. I'm so clueless. I mean I like 98% of him but that 2% makes me so mad. A friend at work told me that the 2% is the most important. So in other words he is messing up the two basic fundamentals of friendship. Please help me decide what to do, sometimes I get so close to dropping him but then back down. Link to post Share on other sites
A Fly onThe Wall Posted July 16, 2005 Share Posted July 16, 2005 Originally posted by ecybris I just need advice. I'm so clueless. I mean I like 98% of him but that 2% makes me so mad. A friend at work told me that the 2% is the most important. I don't think that it's the 2% that is important . Quite the contrary it's the 98 % that matters . Part of being a good friend is overlooking the "flaws" that all people have. If you don't over look their flaws you are not being their friend, as people are not perfect. I had this friend once that was kinda rude to people when we would go out to different places.. He had that kinda sharp abrasive personality.. It alway's bugged me but I found a way to ignore it and be his friend. Had I not I would've missed out on all the years of the good things that we have had. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ecybris Posted July 16, 2005 Author Share Posted July 16, 2005 Yeah but what about all those mind games he keeps playing like I mentioned above? Link to post Share on other sites
A Fly onThe Wall Posted July 16, 2005 Share Posted July 16, 2005 You should sit him down and face to face straighten it out.. Pull him back into line. If you think he is acting in a fashion that you cannot overlook then it is an issue you need to address with him. You are in control of your friendship. But you can't be vindictive or mean when you approach him with these issues, you need to approach him as his friend Link to post Share on other sites
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