ImaginaryDream Posted January 4, 2017 Share Posted January 4, 2017 I fully admit I haven't read this entire thread.. I don't have the energy if I'm to be completely honest. I've been absent from LS for a bit, but I see some familiar faces so I thought I would share. I know I don't post much, but it's not that I don't read and want to share, it's just so hard because when I type it out, it makes it so real... I'm going on almost 4 years in my A with my coworker. The first three years were your typical MM and AP scenario... hot and cold, nothing emotional, me wanting more but never saying. Things came to a head a few months ago, and for the first time he told me his feelings of love, etc etc.. nothing could have reeled me in so hard as that. Things changed. No more hot and cold. Constant communication.. it felt as if we had entered a different stage in our "relationship". It was more stable, more comfortable.. but the desire and the intensity of our feelings didn't fade. Maybe if we kept this up, it would eventually turn to something more...? Not so much. I'm not sure what happened, but this past week he drew back hard. I can only wonder why. I don't think his W found out, otherwise all communication would have been stopped. I think maybe it just got to be too much for him. The closeness, the sharing... what is it all for? We never future-faked and he never made promises. Seriously, what is the point of this all? That's why I find myself back here, trying to find answers and to know that I'm not alone in this misery. I guess I should say that I know what the answer is.. It's obvious. I just drag this out because I'm not ready to be without him yet... sad huh? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Chica80 Posted January 4, 2017 Author Share Posted January 4, 2017 I fully admit I haven't read this entire thread.. I don't have the energy if I'm to be completely honest. I've been absent from LS for a bit, but I see some familiar faces so I thought I would share. I know I don't post much, but it's not that I don't read and want to share, it's just so hard because when I type it out, it makes it so real... I'm going on almost 4 years in my A with my coworker. The first three years were your typical MM and AP scenario... hot and cold, nothing emotional, me wanting more but never saying. Things came to a head a few months ago, and for the first time he told me his feelings of love, etc etc.. nothing could have reeled me in so hard as that. Things changed. No more hot and cold. Constant communication.. it felt as if we had entered a different stage in our "relationship". It was more stable, more comfortable.. but the desire and the intensity of our feelings didn't fade. Maybe if we kept this up, it would eventually turn to something more...? Not so much. I'm not sure what happened, but this past week he drew back hard. I can only wonder why. I don't think his W found out, otherwise all communication would have been stopped. I think maybe it just got to be too much for him. The closeness, the sharing... what is it all for? We never future-faked and he never made promises. Seriously, what is the point of this all? That's why I find myself back here, trying to find answers and to know that I'm not alone in this misery. I guess I should say that I know what the answer is.. It's obvious. I just drag this out because I'm not ready to be without him yet... sad huh? 4 years, that's a long time!! The thing is we can tell ourselves all the answers we like. I find that even when you feel you know the answer and you know the truth. It doesn't really matter, if the end result is the same. You can't look to him for answers, because he can't/ won't give them to you. It could be she got suspicious. Or the guilt got to him. Or its actually too difficult for him to continue to be with you and not want more, anymore therefore having to give everything else up...that can be scary. Who knows? The question is why are YOU still here and what do you get out of it? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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