Nearly 8 years, 2 children & no ring

[sandylee1]

All true. But sooner or later, she'll have to deal with formal custody. That's why I recommended she get with her attorney and strategize ways to use past and current events to her best advantage...

 

Mr. Lucky

 

 

I was wrong. I should have said a match made in hell actually.

 

And these events should definetly be used to her advantage.

[SoleMate]

Aurelie, any update? How are you doing?

[GoldSparkz]

It sounds to me like you have major insecurities which may stem from the traumatic birth and the scarring as a result. Your lack of confidence will eventually spill out into other aspects of the relationship and your boyfriend will pick up on it. He will see that a once confident girlfriend us now very insecure and not the person that he fell in love with.

 

Your worrying about a lack of an engagement ring is most probably as a result of your body insecurities. Because if your boyfriend loves you and sees himself spending the rest of his life with you, why would he agree to getting a vasectomy? This is a big 'final' step for a guy so this shows great commitment in my opinion. If he is showing you his commitment, why do you need a ceremony and ring on your finger? Perhaps he keeps bringing up the subject of marriage to please you because you keep questioning him about it.

 

My advice would be to overcome you insecurities and then decide whether a marriage really does hold any value given that he has committed to you in other ways.

[elaine567]

It sounds to me like you have major insecurities which may stem from the traumatic birth and the scarring as a result. Your lack of confidence will eventually spill out into other aspects of the relationship and your boyfriend will pick up on it. He will see that a once confident girlfriend us now very insecure and not the person that he fell in love with.

 

Your worrying about a lack of an engagement ring is most probably as a result of your body insecurities. Because if your boyfriend loves you and sees himself spending the rest of his life with you, why would he agree to getting a vasectomy? This is a big 'final' step for a guy so this shows great commitment in my opinion. If he is showing you his commitment, why do you need a ceremony and ring on your finger? Perhaps he keeps bringing up the subject of marriage to please you because you keep questioning him about it.

 

My advice would be to overcome you insecurities and then decide whether a marriage really does hold any value given that he has committed to you in other ways.

 

You obviously didn't read the whole thread.

[GoldSparkz]

It sounds to me like you have major insecurities which may stem from the traumatic birth and the scarring as a result. Your lack of confidence will eventually spill out into other aspects of the relationship and your boyfriend will pick up on it. He will see that a once confident girlfriend us now very insecure and not the person that he fell in love with.

 

Your worrying about a lack of an engagement ring is most probably as a result of your body insecurities. Because if your boyfriend loves you and sees himself spending the rest of his life with you, why would he agree to getting a vasectomy? This is a big 'final' step for a guy so this shows great commitment in my opinion. If he is showing you his commitment, why do you need a ceremony and ring on your finger? Perhaps he keeps bringing up the subject of marriage to please you because you keep questioning him about it.

 

My advice would be to overcome you insecurities and then decide whether a marriage really does hold any value given that he has committed to you in other ways.

 

Ooops sorry, I had a baby crying and hastily replied before reading the whole thread. Apologies. Well all I can say is wow, what tense reading! You sound like a strong lass who doesn't suffer fools, so I hope you're OK and you get the support you need.

[Popsicle]

This happened to my best friend. After searching, she found a video of her long-time boyfriend getting a blow job.

 

And guess what? She still stayed with him.

 

Of course she threw him out and acted like she was totally done with him for a while but she still eventually took him back. Many betrayed partners do. They rationalize it in some way.

[Lemonbar]

To be honest, it seems like he stayed with you out of convenience and because you are the mother of his children. He's not okay with completely closing off the doors behind him that should be closed when you get married. Be greatful you aren't ALREADY married. By him not proposing, he's telling you he doesn't value the relationship enough to commit if something better comes along. 130? I'm sure you look great especially after having children. If a man wants to commit, he will. Don't try and convince him because you risk resentment and infidelity in your future marriage.

[elaine567]

To be honest, it seems like he stayed with you out of convenience and because you are the mother of his children. He's not okay with completely closing off the doors behind him that should be closed when you get married. Be greatful you aren't ALREADY married. By him not proposing, he's telling you he doesn't value the relationship enough to commit if something better comes along. 130? I'm sure you look great especially after having children. If a man wants to commit, he will. Don't try and convince him because you risk resentment and infidelity in your future marriage.

 

Had you read the thread you would have known there was no mere "risk" of infidelity, he has already cheated on the OP..

[sandylee1]

Had you read the thread you would have known there was no mere "risk" of infidelity, he has already cheated on the OP..

 

I hear you Elaine.

 

I do wish people would read the thread to, especially when posting so long after the original post.

[anna121]

Think before you post, people.